Fiction by Natalie Paris — new chapters and storieshttps://nparis.co/en-ushttps://nparis.co/works/journal-rpg-actual-plays/a-machine-that-observes/https://nparis.co/works/journal-rpg-actual-plays/a-machine-that-observes/Hopefully this is functional enough as a little baby short story to be worth poasting lol. I just wanted to play a journal game and then when I have a piece of writing I end up wanting to post it somewhere.Mon, 01 Sep 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-002/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-003/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-004/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-001/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-007/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-006/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-005/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-008/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-009/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-010/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-014/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-012/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-013/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-011/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-017/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-017/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-016/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-016/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-015/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-018/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-018/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-020/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-020/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-019/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-019/New chapter of Tomorrow Ye Will Get Your Pay.Tue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-021/https://nparis.co/works/tomorrow-ye-will-get-your-pay/ch-021/I can see the future, and it’s a place about seventy miles east of here, where it’s lighter. “Let X Equal X” Laurie AndersonTue, 22 Apr 2025 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/running-dogs-running-dogs/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/running-dogs-running-dogs/ch-001/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Tue, 31 Dec 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/running-dogs-running-dogs/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/running-dogs-running-dogs/ch-002/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Tue, 31 Dec 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/running-dogs-running-dogs/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/running-dogs-running-dogs/ch-003/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Tue, 31 Dec 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/there-is-a-snake-in-swans/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/there-is-a-snake-in-swans/You know exactly who wrote this lmfao. This is fig leaf anon at absolute best lmfao I thought about calling this one "Leda and the Ugly Duckling" but I didn't think it quite jelled as a title. This also could have gone into my "the difference between \_\_\_\_\_ and \_\_\_\_\_" series of fics but I decided against it. Probably it would have been "The Difference Between Gratitude and Guilt" but that's less of a ringer... This fic is very much "about" the play of power, as it reflects in the domestic sphere. Eva is conscious of the power as exerted on her, but is less conscious of the way she herself holds power-- both as the "right" person in society and as Felix's mother, larger and stronger than he is. This is not a world of equals :| but I wanted to like, explore how even in this unequal world love can exist. it's a very domestic story and therefore very very different from the "spirit" of LOGH. not sure how I feel about that... idk. I think that made this fic particularly difficult to write, but I knew you really wanted Eva/Elfriede so I tried my hardest to make it cohere (does it cohere? it coheres...) Since Sylvia Plath's "Three Women" was originally written as a piece for radio, it felt appropriate to include here. I suppose the "third woman" who does not appear in this fic has to be Hilda? It would have been nice to include her but I couldn't fit her in. But the other two are a woman who miscarries and a woman who gives up her baby for adoption (while citing the Leda story) so i liked the idea of vaguely structuring this fic around that. The first song lyrics from Dominique are directly from the poem, but the second set are original uhhh there's probably more to say about this one but you can say it yourself I'm sure :p Thu, 28 Nov 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-anachronism-of-the-marmoset/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-anachronism-of-the-marmoset/to be clear I don't know anything about roman history so this is fully fanfiction of the TV show. any resemblance to actual history is pure coincidence. I, CLAVDIVS thematically is like... about this backwards looking lens-- the certainty of history vs the uncertainty of prophecy. the narrative knows the future when none of the characters do, the audience playing the part of the sibyl. you know how it is. anyway nobody else has written this particular i clavdivs yaoi and i'm ngl herod/claudius is pretty yaoiful. so i will bear this burden. for all of us. also, to the one person who is an active writer in the I, CLAVDIVS tag... you should watch the hit space opera anime of the 90s: Legend of the Galactic Heroes. You'll love it I promise. Thu, 28 Nov 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/euphonia-hotel-sutra/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/euphonia-hotel-sutra/funnily enough, both my rarepairs exchange fics have involved doomed couples failing to have a drink together i think this one maybe could have been longer, but it's an hour until reveals and i don't want to like, sit on this one and gift it late, so it's moving out the door haha. i think i've said everything that i need to say 😅 i hope i've captured the essence correctly, and i hope you enjoy lol title is a joke on ['brisbane hotel sutra'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4WOW9Mn0gQ) Sun, 18 Aug 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/going-to-denmark/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/going-to-denmark/ch-001/> _Your bright eyes render all discussion pointless > Your bright eyes are gonna kill me for sure > I look at you and I know that the house will come down > Because your burning eyes are bright and pure > [...] > There's a room for us in a red brick building > By a bright green field in a very old country_ Mon, 12 Aug 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-040/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-040/[Oh God the pride of man! Broken in the dust again!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zc1P4TkWN5g) and so we come to the end of this book! thank you all so so much for sticking with me for so long-- this one took longer to write than I ever imagined (proooobably because i kept stopping to write other novels in the middle lol) but I hope that the journey was worth it. and I'm sorry to end on a cliffhanger lol. on that note: this story is going on hiatus, sorta. my schedule is looking like this: - run the [logh rarepairs exchange](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/logh_rarepair_exchange_2024) (which you should sign up for!) - next few months, write a novel-length fic for the [logh big bang](https://twitter.com/logh_Bang) - depending on how i'm feeling, either work on [Every Hateful Instrument](https://archiveofourown.org/works/33371965) or - the thing i actually want to talk about in this author's note, which is a rework of the alliance side of the story now, i can hear every experienced web fiction reader groaning/screaming/throwing up. "i'm going to do a rewrite of the early parts of the story" is like the tolling of a death bell for web serials. but. i would hope that i have enough credit in your banks of trust to know that i'm capable of following through on things lol. anyway, the issue is, as i'm sure you may have noticed-- the alliance side of this story is way way way underdeveloped compared to the empire side. on some level this is natural-- LOGH is reinhard's tragedy; WIAW is yang's. but, to put myself in a position to succeed for writing the next two books ( *lightless labyrinth* and *silent spiral*) I need to have a solid foundation to build from on both sides of the story. and right now, that straight up isn't there. also the timeline is mega broken b/c i fucked up bad lol. so i need to fix that. so my plan is to near completely rewrite *life out of balance* and then add significant material to *lighting out for the territories*. i don't expect either of these things to be super like, difficult, but it is something that will take effort. but it has to be done before i can move forward. so. keep an eye out for that. (i guess reinhard fans rejoice? i /want/ to give him a good story lol-- i've just been doing a pretty poor job at it so far.) oh, also, phezzan novella. that will get slotted in somewhere. anyway. sorry that this means that the story won't be moving forward for minimum 6 months, probably closer to a year. but it will eventually move forward. SMST was like the halfway point of my planned story-- there's a lot that i'm really really excited to get to. if you're excited to read it, trust me, i'm more excited to write it 😅 but i do really want to reiterate how grateful i am to everyone who's stuck around so far, especially everyone who's left a comment (on here or on lofter) or come to hang out on discord. i would not be doing this without your support. thank you 💙💙💙 i really hope i'm giving you a story worth your time (if i am, hit that kudos button on your way out, why don'tcha :p i want to climb the rankings lol. and tell all your friends to read this story too. shameless request for advertising over here lol) anyway. thank you. and i really hope you enjoyed it ;0; special thanks as always to em for the beta read. couldn't do it without you 💙💙💙 join me on discord, etc ! https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 25 Jun 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-039/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-039/the title means "cows' milk is for the calves" (to be followed immediately by the line "the juice of the barley for me") i know the rule in literature is that no one is dead until you see the body. rest assured, count mariendorf is genuinely dead. should probably explain where i've been. uh. did i talk about whale novel in my last chapter end notes? idk. anyway i wrote whale novel. if anything comes of it publishing wise, I'll let you know. if you are anywhere in the area of providence, rhode island on june 10 at 5pm, you are obligated to come to [my talk at the providence public library](https://provlib.libcal.com/event/12250272). not kidding i do need people to come to it lmao. if you're in boston hop on that T and come see me 🚃 oh i also moved houses and switched jobs. my life has been uh. all over the place of late. but only one more chapter of SMST to go!!! definitely for sure 10000% will be done by the end of june. speaking of june. i will be running the logh rarepairs exchange again, so make sure you sign up for that. [details forthcoming on twitter.](https://twitter.com/loghrarepairex) other notable event this summer is [timehopper's logh big bang.](https://twitter.com/logh_Bang) sign up for 50+k with meeee this fandom needs more good longfic :p thank you so much as always to em for the beta read! discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 05 Jun 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-train-sets-off-the-platform-remains-behind/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-train-sets-off-the-platform-remains-behind/the whole time I was writing this fic i was thinking about how oddly unseasonal to watch this movie at any time other than new year's eve lol. new year's eve is the irony of fate containment zone. i don't know if i was able to give ippolit as happy of an ending as you wanted but I hope this fic is to your satisfaction anyway 😅 i found it so funny while rewatching this movie with ippolit glasses on that everyone accuses him of being boring when he is... well he's Like That. an odd contradiction that i wanted to explore i picked 1977 for the date but honestly i have no idea if that's the year that the movie is theoretically set in haha. it's just the year after it aired Sat, 27 Apr 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/numberless-army-of-cephalophores/the-trouble-with-desire-or-protect-me-from-what-i-want/https://nparis.co/works/numberless-army-of-cephalophores/the-trouble-with-desire-or-protect-me-from-what-i-want/I love when I get assigned an OW request that's just an excuse to write a weird little SF short story... truly nothing better than that lol. I hope you enjoy this one! I love writing about the weird melancholy of memory and desire... it's really something I'm a bit obsessed with. And robots as Things that by the nature of computers have mutable memory (perfect, but erasable... very different from the flesh) and are supposed to lack desire, are an interesting avenue to use for exploration of those subjects. Mon, 22 Apr 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/you-who-come-demanding-proof-let-your-god-rebuild-this-roof/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/you-who-come-demanding-proof-let-your-god-rebuild-this-roof/The title is a little bit of a joke. It's a line from ["Their Gods Do Not Have Surgeons"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSeeyH3jXPs), in which the pagan narrator bemoans the destruction of the temple to Isis, after the conversion of Rome to Christianity. > melted holes in celluloid / give me back what you've destroyed / you who come demanding proof / let your god rebuild this roof > and restore the temple of isis at memphis But the song is invoking a biblical image from john 2:19-21 > 19 Jesus answered them, “Destroy this temple, and I will raise it again in three days.” > > 20 They replied, “It has taken forty-six years to build this temple, and you are going to raise it in three days?” 21 But the temple he had spoken of was his body. The physical temple referred to is, of course, the second temple in jerusalem. which has some metatextual relevance to the earth church plot. to me. but the idea of a resurrection and legacy became very important to this fic... idk. I had originally set out to make this fic significantly more about the Earth Church b/c i am an unhealthy level of obsessed with the Earth Church plotline, but instead I think it came out in a much more interesting way, being about the way all of these various people in reinhard's orbit are in some ways operating under this logic of failed continuations of their family line. hilde is not a son; reinhard has no interest in marriage; oberstein and kummel have genetic problems that under the last dynasty disqualified them; reuenthal is reuenthal; mittermeyer can't have a kid, etc. it's a thematically rich vein to tap into, so i really had fun trying to tease out these connections. i hope you enjoy it 😅 i also am such a sucker for the frame narrative + little vignettes structure, where the smaller scenes directly interrogate and challenge the framing device... i probably should not do this super often but i do love it a lot... thank you so much to em for the beta read Fri, 05 Apr 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-038/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-038/sorry for my extremely protracted absence from this story ;0; the long story short is that i had to drop everything and write a novel about whales (a novel about the absence of whales?) so that’s where i’ve been… you can read whale novel on my discord if you like https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu (you have to go to #get-roles and press the whale button). but anyway that book will either end up published for real or posted online like all my other web serials at some point lol. so even if you don’t feel like reading it there, you’ll see it eventually anyway my life has also just in general been total chaos. got a new job. gonna have to move. that kind of thing. bweh. but we’re super close to finishing this book… it’s going to be so weird to actually finish it b/c i’ve been working on it for so long. 2 years and 4 months. coincidentally, that’s almost exactly the span of time that the novel itself covers. me and yang wenli shaking hands meme living through jan 2022-april 2024. or whatever the years are in the story. but it’s 2 and change. happy million words of WIAW? i should do something to celebrate but i don’t have anything planned lol. maybe i should have something real for the last chapter of SMST… join my discord if you have ideas and tell them to me. you probably missed all the recent (“recent”) fics I wrote for various exchanges, such as Fic In a Box and the LOGH New Year exchange, so click on my profile and check those out. I’m especially proud of my julian/machungo fic [”A Cathedral (In a Dream (of the Future))”](“) which i don’t think many people have read 😅 so go read that lol in other bookkeeping-esque news, this story now has a korean translation! go check out zebi’s work over on posttype! yeah. the last two chapters of this story should be coming Soon™️. it really will be weird to have it done done… again, discord has a more active status-update scene lol i see in these notes i haven’t actually talked about the chapter. well it’s yaoibait. yangsbach is not real except for the ways in which it is :p thank you so so much as always to Em for the beta read anyway thanks for reading. leave me a comment whydontcha 😅Sat, 23 Mar 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/every-link-was-freedoms-name/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/every-link-was-freedoms-name/ch-001/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Thu, 29 Feb 2024 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/a-cathedral-in-a-dream-of-the-future/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/a-cathedral-in-a-dream-of-the-future/lmfao there's literally no point in pretending to be anon here-- no one else is made as bonkers in yonkers by the earth church plotline as i am. this story was made to be a companion piece to ["The Destruction of the Second Temple; or, We Accuse Genocide"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/42029703/chapters/105523938) though you can probably read this one first, even though without that basis it might feel like a bit of a jarring reinterpretation of canon. sorry about that... you requested Julian/Machungo's Fun Earth Church Arc... which is i mean... technically that's what this is... anyway the whole throwaway plotline of Julian losing the Earth Church data disk on odin and then suspiciously getting it back is like. oh my god. LOGH you can't DO this to me. this is the most "my hotel room has obviously been broken into by government agents trying to set me up" ever written, and the fact that actually LOGH wants us to take those events at face value is [scream]. i love this show but what on earth (heh). this is my attempt to massage that plot point into making a little more sense the title is from the mountain goats song [Ezekiel 7 and the Permanent Efficacy of Grace](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQ-zZJu6LKI) but I wanted the structure of the title, with the different layers, to represent the layers of the fic. logh -> julian's memoirs -> the short story. "did oberstein&co actually set up the earth church to take the blame for him assassinating yang for the sake of galactic peace" the longest thread in the history of forums, anyway, I hope you like it despite it being a little bit out there 😅 thank you very much to Kay for the beta read! Sun, 31 Dec 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/the-other-side-of-the-looking-glass/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/the-other-side-of-the-looking-glass/there's literally no point in being anon you know who's writing this 😅 i'm nooooot stealthy. though i at least avoided blabbing about this one on twitter lol anyway i wanted to do something a lot more elaborate for this gift but i, uh, ran out of time and am squeaking this one in at the last minute. (very last minute. it could use an edit lol.) i hope it's still a good new years gift for you anyway 💙💙💙 hmu when i have like actual free time and i'll write the reurein novella that you probably actually wanted lmao. but it was very fun to write this fic! i've wanted to write a fic with Alexander and Emil for a long time and so I'm very grateful for the opportunity to do it. the idea of emil finding himself on the opposite side of the strange ghost-relationship he and reinhard shared makes me very ;0; post-series it seems like reinhard would be such an absence in everyone's life, in the same way that kircheis was in his... anyway happy new year again... i hope 2024 gives you everything your heart desires! 🎇🎇🎇 Sun, 31 Dec 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-short-stories/molon-labe/https://nparis.co/works/misc-short-stories/molon-labe/We matched on the 'aspiring young criminal over his head' tag-- i hope you enjoy this story! it was a very interesting challenge to write. it's been a long time since i've gotten to write an original short story haha. thank you to aetheo and unice for the beta read! Mon, 18 Dec 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-037/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-037/This chapter is a structural inverse of Eva's earlier chapter, "Leaving the City". Both chapters are titled after Joanna Newsom songs from the same album (this one: ["The Things I Say"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eupLpsycx3Y)), and Mittermeyer speaks to Reuenthal and then returns to the ruined city and the apartment that Eva left. He's escorted by Hilde rather than Kircheis, of course-- another structural inverse. If you read the two chapters side by side, there's a bunch of things that tie them directly together. But ignore me this is just me playing around with structure like it's a toy 😅 Part of the Reumitt convo will have relevance to Yang in upcoming chapters. Place your bets on what that is now lol. I do worry a little that the Reumitt convo was a bit short-- there were many, many things that did not get discussed. But this conversation was never one in which anything was going to get resolved, so maybe that's for the best. Speaking of Yang-- thank god we're going back to Yang-land lol. Next chapter belongs to him. Hopefully it will be done soon. I really want to finish this book before the end of the year and I have a tonnnn of stuff I need to get done. Anyway please leave a comment/let me know what you think/etc. We're coming very very close to the end of the story, so :] thank you so much as always to em for the beta read! uh you can find me in the usual places but i'm posting this from work so i'm too lazy to fish around and find the links. just go back to last chapter to grab the discord invite lmao. uhh logh watchparty saturdays at 5 eastern / thursdays 7 eastern rerun. join us.Thu, 07 Dec 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-difference-between-giving-and-taking/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-difference-between-giving-and-taking/this fic is actually only 2k words long. idk where the extra 7.5k came from 😅 this one got away from me i offered this fandom on a whim-- i really had forgotten how much i loved this movie so I'm really glad I got to write for it. amanda my beloved little freak... i hope i walked the right line here of her stated emotionlessness, it was tricky to balance her having desires but having her process them all through this filter of not having them... idk 🤔 i hope you enjoy my take on her! her ending dream description monologue in the movie really really got to me ;0; Sat, 02 Dec 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/when-i-was-a-child-i-talked-like-a-child-i-thought-like-a-child-i-reasoned-like-a-child/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/when-i-was-a-child-i-talked-like-a-child-i-thought-like-a-child-i-reasoned-like-a-child/The title, and the sermon that Anne says Mr. Allan gave, are from 1 Corinthians 13. "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me." it is, unfortunately, a bible passage i'm unpleasant levels of obsessed with lmao. when i was writing this story i was like "oh, this is kinda an evil little fic isn't it." incredible for how one of the sweetest canons in existence it is still possible to write something a bit miserable 👍 sometimes you are so very in love with your best friend, and you do not have the words to express it, and so you try to make her give an indirect kiss to your reflection. this does not make you feel weirdbad at all. reading AoGG doesn't at all make me feel ;0; ;0; ;0; about anne's feelings towards diana. not at all lmao. anyway it was really fun to reread AoGG-- i requested you for swaps on a total whim and I'm very glad I got you haha. i hadn't read the book in probably a decade, and it was fun to come back to it with fresh eyes. thanks for requesting it 💙 Sat, 02 Dec 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/where-did-the-future-go-parts-unknown/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/where-did-the-future-go-parts-unknown/when I originally requested you for swaps I was like "I want to write for Moon (2009)" but then as soon as I sat down to actually do so I was like "ah. I have no idea what I want to write for Moon (2009)." so I looked at your other requests and said "well, I've been \*meaning\* to read LHoD for about a million years, maybe now's the time lol". so. new canon yay! The only other Le Guin book I've read is *The Dispossessed* so hopefully I haven't made any truly canon-breaking continuity errors with regards to the rest of the cycle haha I really wanted to do some worldbuilding about what the future would look like-- post canon fics are a favorite of mine to write in general-- and the Ekumen with all its worlds so far apart is fascinating to me in how it manages to function as a society, and how Foretelling has the potential to cause incredible problems when loosed on the universe at large (clearly from all the folklore bits in the book, it already causes plenty of problems on Gethen alone lol) I was originally intending to do one of your opt-in mediums, but then I opened a document and just started writing, and before I knew it i had hit my swapsignment goal 😅 ah well maybe next FIAB I'll get to write a play about Therem Harth lol I hope the interchanging of Genly/Genry and He/She pronouns for him isn't too confusing-- I was trying to indicate when Sorve was thinking in his Gethen framework or Genly's Terran one. Not sure if that actually comes across correctly haha. The title is from Handsome Furs ["Repatriated"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJOFwJP6B_U) i hope you like this-- it was really fun to work on! and i'm glad i had the excuse to read a really great book haha thank you very very much as always to Em for the beta read Sat, 02 Dec 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-036/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-036/mea culpa for the prolonged absence. lot has been going on in my life and none of it is worth getting into here lmao. i really truly am trying to finish this book by the end of the year though. i need to get it done eva continues to possibly have the worst time of every character in SMST lol. people on discord were like "wow reinhard is not going to be nice about a little kaiser showing up on his doorstep" and i was thinking to myself. well. reinhard is lucky just this once to avoid me giving him the opportunity to behave badly lmao. eva isn't, and nor is ingrid, or erwin josef, or annerose, or magdalena, or caribelle, but, hey, at least reinhard doesn't have to dirty his hands here. for now anyway. and this is the last we'll see of eva for quite some time. she'll \*probably\* next show up in Lightless Labyrinth, but no promises as to when that book will actually start getting written lol. thank you so much as always to em for the beta read you can find me in the usual places javert @ tumblr , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . join my discord for logh rewatch saturdays 5pm eastern time or thursdays 7pm eastern. we've finally made it to s1 🥳🥳🥳🥳Wed, 29 Nov 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-035/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-035/we've made it to the end of the odin arc-- thank god. i think this has been the most difficult [on both a technical and emotional level] set of chapters i've ever written haha. not that things really get /easier/ from here but they're at least not the SMST Odin arc. we'll be back to odin in a bit for braunschweig's crew (remember them? it's been a hot minute lol. currently the team assembled is mittermeyer, merkatz, and flegel-- a combination of dudes for the ages lmfao) to retake the planet. but for now. this is where we leave the odin crew. absolutely everybody has had just a straight up nightmare of a time. including me. anyway... i know i've said this at like 16 different points but we are finally for real in the home stretch of this book. i'd love to hear what you all are thinking about it all 💙 god i miss martin sm already. he was just my special little guy!!! my guy!!!!!! ;0; ;0; ;0; i know he inspired mixed feelings (lol) in many of you but yeah. in many ways he epitomized my feelings about this project as a whole-- so it's kinda inevitable and an honor for him to be the first major death. even so. it would have been nice if he could have lived 😭 anyway. there should be a bonus chapter coming out in a few days, and then i have to take a break to work on my fic in a box assignments, but i'm committed to having this book done by the end of the year at the very least lol. so i shall do my absolute best to get things accomplished in a timely manner thank you so much as always to em for the beta readWed, 20 Sep 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-034/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-034/The title is from Les Misérables Thank you very very much as always to Em for the beta read! you can find me in the usual places javert @ tumblr , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . join my discord for logh rewatch sundays 4pm eastern time. we're on the HBSHBL gaiden rn ✌Mon, 18 Sep 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/an-antidote-for-strychnine/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/an-antidote-for-strychnine/It amazes me that I've somehow written well over a million words of fic for this series and I somehow, until now, hadn't written an Oberstein fic lol. It's funny-- I really do like him, but it's very hard to figure out the right angle on him. Canon gives us so little information about what's going on inside his head-- which is, of course, intentional. Anyway I hope that my peek inside his brain rings true here. It's especially funny to look at Oberstein in a period of life when he \*doesn't\* have all the answers-- or any answers at all, really. In canon he always seems to have all the information that he needs for any given situation, to shape it the way he wants. But without any power, who is he? Just one more guy being slowly squished under the Empire's Machine That Eats People. [he title is, ofc, from the mountain goats song of the same name](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QxqjV-A47xUt) thank you so much to em for the beta read as always 💙💙💙💙 anon for WDLF but i assume everyone who's clicked on this from the logh tag knows exactly how to find me lmfao Wed, 06 Sep 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/attempting-to-do-away-with-it-entirely/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/attempting-to-do-away-with-it-entirely/first of all i have to say @ my WDLF recip here: your prompts were so good pleeeeeeeease please please come hang out in logh fandom and request it in every exchange ever so that i can write for you again lol. this one was so fun and i was /thrilled/ to get to write a logh prompt for WDLF (that wasn't CCoF lol) i might go back and make some edits to this fic at some point b/c i'm posting it at [checks clock] 40 mins before reveals. so i have not gotten to do much editing lol. but hopefully the core of it is still a good gift o7 i love reuenthal and elfriede's fucked up mess so much. like SO much. they mean everything to me. usually i don't like the Reinhard Royal We translation choice that the hidive subs make but it kinda works here? i hope anyway lol anyway i've been writing this at work all day lol. i need to hit post and then commute home from work 😅 theoretically anon for WDLF but anyone finding this via the logh tag-- i'm sure you know where to find me lmfao. Wed, 06 Sep 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/and-the-big-wheel-keep-on-turning/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/and-the-big-wheel-keep-on-turning/ch-003/nvm i don't have anything constructive to say in these endnotes lolWed, 23 Aug 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-033/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-033/sorry kay this one is more setup :p there's something a little awkward about this chapter in that the emotional scene is frontloaded and then immediately undercut by kircheis ending up going to martin. but ah well. there's no way to backload that emotional moment and have the necessary setup for the next chapter... if i kept it all as one massive chunk it might be less weird but i can't do that. i'm addicted to posting 😔😔😔😔 and also that would be a stupid amount of words to drop at once. so. the song that martin hums is the school song of my alma mater, which did play from the clock tower at noon lol "is kircheis saint peter" the worst fucking thread in the history of biblical allusions etc etc etc. he does have a textually important set of housekeys tho. so who's to say. you'll almost certainly want to go check out the latest chapter of [and the big wheel keep on turning](https://archiveofourown.org/works/41588007/chapters/125073046) characters who know they're about to die do have a bit of a special place in my heart 💙 i think this is because i was raised catholic and that's sorta like. the whole thing. thanks as always to em for the beta read! next chapter ideally coming soonish? i'm a couple thousand words into it and have a solid plan, and furthermore want to get it done. so. we'll see. anyway you can find me in the usual places javert @ tumblr , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . uhh join my discord for logh rewatch sundays 4pm eastern time. we're watching golden wings this sunday ✌Tue, 22 Aug 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-032/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-032/[*it's not the room, not beginning, not the crowd, not winning, not the planet, not spinning, not a ruse, not heat, not the fire lapping up the creek, not food, not to eat*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIcVwH47uxQ) TYVM as always to em for all the help with this chapter javert @ tumblr , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSun, 13 Aug 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-031/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-031/i think it's very logh to introduce and then instantly kill off a minor character how sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child! though i should perhaps have titled this chapter 'blood running down the stairs: cascade' lol this chapter is crammed through with various images lol, feat. both the lightless labyrinth and the silent spiral, as well as you know, some yonic rocks, and reuenthal finally getting to do the arson he's been dreaming of since the day he was born i love erwin josef actually but it's kinda canon that he is a total fucking menace. but honestly... he got kidnapped... so he deserves to be allowed to savagely attack whoever tf he wants. anyway i'd love to hear what you all think about eva's terrible horrible no good very bad day (it's unfortunately only going to get worse from here). if you want to reap the rewards of being a plot important character, you have to suffer the mortifying ordeal of. well. just ordeals, unfortunately :( i have put women in this story just for the sake of fucking up their lives in some heretofore unimaginable ways. sorry women! thank you so much as always to em for the beta read you know where to find me: javert @ tumblr , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . come join us for our logh rewatch! sundays @ 4 eastern. we're watching the mutineer gaiden next week :] it's always a good timeWed, 02 Aug 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/in-that-rich-earth-a-richer-dust-concealed/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/in-that-rich-earth-a-richer-dust-concealed/title from "the soldier" by rupert brooke. somewhat tongue in cheek usage lmao. i'm thinking about wrapping up and printing out this collection of short stories... this one is meant to be a sort of introduction to the general set. it's very much a "nat rome" piece lol. but if you have any canon compliant shorts you want to see written (esp that you think would fit thematically) get yr suggestions in before i'm finished (in a couple months). i think i still have a few more things i want to write in here but yeah. i do take requests if you've got something interesting lol. anyway you should join the logh rewatch happening on my discord server https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . sundays 4pm eastern time. we just finished up spiral labyrinth (the reason for this fic getting written), and we're doing chronological order, working our way through the gaidens, so you've got plenty of time to hop on board if you're interested :) i'd love to have you around i hope you all like this fic lol. i'm aware that i continue to write ever niche-er things but you know. they call to my soul lol. anyway i'd love to hear what you think! thank you so much as always to em for the beta read! i'm @ javert on tumblr and @ natsinator on twitter, however long twitter lasts lol Tue, 25 Jul 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-030/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-030/lol this chapter was originally supposed to be part of the next eva chapter, but then Em told me that it would probably work better on its own, so it has been split. anyway now we can finally stop having this secret hanging over our heads lol. sorry eva........................ feel free to put another "a ring changes hands" check on your bingo cards if you're keeping track :p this was not the first and it certainly shall not be the last reuenthal is ofc the presence haunting this conversation-- present in image only. elfriede unintentionally echoes his words when she asks eva if she hates her, and eva unintentionally echoes his actions when she stares into the candle flame to avoid looking at anyone else (see: TWS ch1) evil women being godawful to each other in the horrid girl house... i think this chapter was weird to write in some ways b/c a lot of it is about magdalena's traits-- which have thus far been presented as neutral ish-- being now turned around by elfride. kay from my discord probably will appreciate this lol since he is a noted magdalena critic :p anyway sorry this one took so long... i'm trying to get back into the game lol. also: there's probably a bunch of stuff of mine that you haven't read. check out - [[WIAW] Those Few Who've Slipped the Surly Bonds](https://archiveofourown.org/works/47657656) - [[WIAW] The World In Its Circular Way](https://archiveofourown.org/works/47409136) - [[Annerose/Magdalena, canon compliant] Unstable Mass of Blood and Foam](https://archiveofourown.org/works/47567389) and i always appreciate a comment on anything letting me know what you think/that you're all still alive out there haha 💙 hope you're all doing well thank you so much as always to em for the beta read! you can find me in the usual places: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . wrt my discord: we're having a LOGH rewatch: sundays at 4pm eastern. currently we're about to start the second half of spiral labyrinth (we're doing gaidens -> movies -> ova watch order) and i'd love to have you join!Sun, 09 Jul 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/those-few-whove-slipped-the-surly-bonds/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/those-few-whove-slipped-the-surly-bonds/ch-001/mixing my Shakespeare here— they quote alternately from hamlet and macbethMon, 05 Jun 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/those-few-whove-slipped-the-surly-bonds/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/those-few-whove-slipped-the-surly-bonds/ch-002/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Mon, 05 Jun 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/those-few-whove-slipped-the-surly-bonds/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/those-few-whove-slipped-the-surly-bonds/ch-003/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Mon, 05 Jun 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/unstable-mass-of-blood-and-foam/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/unstable-mass-of-blood-and-foam/So sorry that this is untitled lmfao. This is the pinch hit to end all pinch hits and I could not think of a title. I prommy I’ll think of one in the next couple days… I hope you enjoy this story <3 Despite having to crunch to get this done I really loved writing it— Annerose and Magdalena are like… theeeeeee ship for me so it’s always a blast to give them some attention haha. ok i need to stop writing notes because i need to post this and then [redacted for anonymity reasons] Thu, 01 Jun 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/the-world-in-its-circular-way/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/the-world-in-its-circular-way/ch-001/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Thu, 25 May 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/the-world-in-its-circular-way/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/the-world-in-its-circular-way/ch-002/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Thu, 25 May 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-029/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-029/womp womp womp well at least now you know how all three of the odin plots are going to tie together lol. i hope it all dovetails nicely 😅😅 the title of this chapter is from les miserables, but also picked because of siegfried idyll :p i like to think that hilde being a bit of an established go-getter could become a tragic flaw in a universe where nobody is capable of keeping their hands clean, as opposed to logh where most characters' hands are scrupulously shiny by narrative design this will prooooooobably be the last chapter for a hot second. i have to write my rarepairs exchange fic, and then after that i'm going on vacation to europe for 3 weeks (reminder: if you are in or near glasgow, paris, or lisbon, dm me. i'd love to hang out). and also the next 3 chapters all happen essentially simultaneously, so i miiiiiiiiiight release them all at once so you can pick your reading order. that kinda depends on how able to keep things secret i am though lol thank you so much as always to em for the beta read! you can find me in the usual places: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . oh also if you're not already on my discord, i'm starting an epic group rewatch of logh for the ages. come join us! it's gonna be great! we're going to have the most unhinged watch order in the history of ever lolMon, 15 May 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-028/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-028/and blessed is the fruit of your womb ;) betcha didn't expect this to be the wiaw turnaround of the reumitt baby adoption plot lol the hints have been here for a long time i think but it's a little easier to see in retrospect, as most such things are 😅 tysm as always to em for the beta read 💙 you can find me in all the usual places: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 02 May 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-027/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-027/we are about to enter the most exciting string of chapters in this story yet lol. i don't think i've been this excited to write something since the end of itsoh act 2 lol. i love it when all the dominoes i've spent so long setting up finally get to start falling-- it makes the writing way easier b/c all the tools i need are at hand and it's payoff all the way down haha. anyway no one has yet guessed what is going to happen next chapter even though i've set it up in a /very/ obvious in hindsight way so i have to imagine you all are going to be very surprised lol. we're headed back to the horrible girl house next chapter :3 anyway... um well the title of this chapter is from the book of david and belshazzar's feast. it's maybe a /little/ on the nose but i've wanted to name a chapter this for aaages so here it is haha thank you very much as always to em for the beta read 💙 you can find me in all the usual places: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 25 Apr 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/that-which-resembles-the-grave-but-isnt/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/that-which-resembles-the-grave-but-isnt/I thought extremely long and hard about what I wanted to do for this prompt, and I deliberated on it for so long that I'm really just squeaking this one in before the deadline lol. I wanted to do something that felt \*true\* to the original work while still feeling sufficiently angsty, and since so much of the climax of this book is about a certain flavor of dramatic irony-- not knowing that a person who loves you is right next door-- i thought it would be fun to do a sort of continuation of that idea. Tom believes that Ralph never forgives him for running away-- what if Ralph, a sweet man from what we know of him, did forgive Tom, but simply never got to tell him that? maybe it's a bit too stretched of a premise that there could be enough of a miscommunication for Ralph to actually think that Tom is dead, rather than having run away, but I hope it doesn't break your suspension of disbelief tooo much haha i haven't read a little princess in many years-- coming back to it as an adult is kinda a strange feeling. on one hand-- it is obvious why this book remains beloved and charming to read, but otoh, oh boy those diamond mines (and everything else lol). the politics do not really stand up to modern sentiments 😅 but this isn't a letter about captain crewe suddenly coming to an understanding about how colonialism is bad lmao. that would have probably been a significantly worse fic, or at the very least a /very/ different (and probably much longer) one haha anyway, i hope you enjoyed! it was really fun to write something historical, and i know this is an epistolary exchange so ofc i was writing a letter, but i do /love/ writing epistolary fic lol. thank you so much for wanting delicious delicious angst Sat, 22 Apr 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-026/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-026/boy i wonder what phezzan's up to :p i hope my "muller regurgitates a half remembered rein blog post to infodump phezzan's economics" is a) not boring and b) at least makes a /little/ sense lol. i try. i'm not an economics expert unfortunately 😅 why i have written a series that foregrounds it, i couldn't really tell you lol. b/c i have terminal "i need to explain how things work" hard sf writer brain ig. the unholy lovechild of victor hugo and kim stanley robinson that lives in my brain and rattles the bars of its cage occasionally shorter chapter but that's why it's an interlude. just have to remind everyone (esp my imperial-side-only readers) that yang's civil war problems are, uh, only some of his problems lol it would be fun for me to have made this series a 3 way split, and given the rubinsky-dominique-kesserlink-earth church leadership squad their own section, but also, no it wouldn't have lmao. you should thank me for not doing that. as with most of the chapters involving muller in this section, the title is from ['letter from belgium'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2L9VseqsNKA) as usual, you can find me at tumblr @ javert, twitter @ natsinator, gayspaceopera.carrd.co, and you can join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 19 Apr 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/and-this-is-how-you-can-be-walking-and-falling-at-the-same-time/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/and-this-is-how-you-can-be-walking-and-falling-at-the-same-time/do i have much to say about this one? idk. i think it probably speaks for itself haha. the title is from laurie anderson: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxeK-KYvibc thank you so much to ren and em for the beta read 💙 Wed, 12 Apr 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-025/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-025/rip muckenburger 💔 i actually really like him as an ultraminor logh character so it's kinda an honor for him to get the first major-ish onscreen death. stabbed to death by flegel... what a miserable way to go lol. and that's the end of the iserlohn stuff for the moment-- next chapter i think we'll check in with [redacted] unless i change my mind and have the reunion w/ mittermeyer be next chapter. kinda depends on how i'm feeling. i had more to say but i've lost it 😔 well it's all in the chapter anyway lol oh, here's something: do you live in or near any of the following cities: glasgow, paris, or lisbon? if you do, and you want to hang out, dm me... i'm going to be in your fine cities in the end of may/early june. noodle's overseas vacation... thank you so much as always to em for the beta read as usual you can find me on tumblr @ javert, on twitter @ natsinator, and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 12 Apr 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-024/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-024/sorry this one took so long 😔 hopefully it's exciting enough to make up for it writing battle sequences is so hard for a wide variety of reasons-- i was doing my usual whining over on tumblr about the reasons why. i think the main one is that things that make a battle sequence entertaining to read about or watch in an anime often do not feel remotely realistic to me, and so i struggle to walk the line of something feeling plausible enough that i don't feel like it's TOTALLY cheating to write it, and actually succeeds at my goal of being an entertaining milSF novel lol. this whole series would feel a lot different if the battle sequences were "harder" sf i think. anyway. it is weird also to have yang be like straight up winning with military force rather than [insert yang iserlohn trickery here] but hopefully this still feels true to like a yang way of thinking about things. i needed to give him a real win anyway lol. too bad he hates it. shipping cleanliness fans beware the yang/ansbach subtext :p [joshua fit the battle of jericho / where them walls come a'tumblin down](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQLpKLLD8RU) thank you so much as always to em for the beta read 💙💙 btw: if you are a creative yourself, please do sign up for the [logh rarepairs exchange](https://twitter.com/loghrarepairex) that i am running starting late this month. you need an ao3 account to participate, so if you don't have one, now is the time to sign up. this event is for artists and writers so please do join me :3 you can find me in the usual places: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuMon, 20 Mar 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-014/lol sorry to anyone actually waiting on updates to this story. i did not really mean to let it go a year sans update 😅 one of my goals is to finish this book this year, though i do not promise regular updates until i finish writing SMST (which is my actual top priority) anyway. slight bit of aymon's backstory time. he's talked about Loan before, and she also very briefly shows up in New Creatures With New Hearts. she is, in both places, more of a vessel for plot than anything else (sorry Loan) but it's also very funny to picture aymon having an extremely mutually destructive and wildly codependent friendship with her lol. the layout of the park mentioned in this chapter is fucked up bad urban planning and park design. but much more importantly, it's #symbolic lol. you get it. anyway the usual links: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuFri, 03 Mar 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-023/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-023/"The Hunt for Red October" is a thriller novel about a soviet submarine captain who steals his extremely fancy new type of boat and tries to defect to the US. The name of the ship, Red October, refers to events of the russian october revolution (the events happened in november per the western calendar but russia still used a different one back then lol). here it refers to the fact that the ship is painted bright red "when reinhard gets his little paws on the [barbarossa] is he actually going to name it Red October????" idk what it will be called lol. maybe. i think it would be funny lol. but 'annerose has become maoist' is already very funny idk if we need 'reinhard has become leninist' to match EDIT: annerose is not actually a maoist nor is she planning to become one lmfao... i see this is a case of "i wrote an author's note that is utterly incomprehensible to anyone who does not live inside my head" and then i immediately went to bed, causing mass confusion. annerose quotes mao once offhandedly in LOFTT, and someone made a "sasuke has become catholic" joke about it which has made me mutter to myself "annerose has become maoist..." on a weekly basis for like over a year since then because it makes me crack up. reinhard isn't a leninist either. this book would be significantly worse if i started assigning everyone pet brands of leftism. [spins wheel] magdalena is an anarcho-syndicalist and dusty has been getting really into posadism I DO know what the brunhilde will eventually get named. i've talked about it publicly elsewhere but i shan't here :p you have to know where to look to find the spoilery lore lol people have been begging and pleading for brunhilde and barbarossa to show up and here they are. all of you playing along at home can cross off 'someone commits grand theft starship' on your bingo cards once again :p anyway i said in "the real mr bronner" that i would get to spend some time waxing poetic about the grace and beauty of warships so here's a little bit of that haha this chapter was a pain in the ass to write for no real good reason and tbh if/when i edit this book it might end up deleted. but it's written now so it gets a little chance to live. also fair warning here that i'm retconing the timeline of LOFTT b/c i could not for the life of me get it to actually work with the events of this novel lol. i gave myself way too much time to let the civil war happen in 😅 thank you very very much as always to em for the beta read 💙💙 you can find me in the usual places: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuMon, 13 Feb 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-022/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-022/well if you've been wondering what justification eva has been using about mittermeyer's secret that she absolutely does know about. here it is lol. it's a classic case of fitting the facts to something that you want to be true, rather than actually is true. sorry eva. anyway i have to run to work and i don't want to blab too many spoilers in this note lol but heyo time for eva to get a plot of her own instead of just being a victim of everybody else's plots. it's important for me to do this-- let me not be accused of being a fujo who sidelines women for the sake of the yaoi lmfao. though as with many characters in this series, there's not that much for me to work with 😅 there's only so far the perfect wife persona can take a character lol chapter title is from the joanna newsom song of the same name happy lunar new year! thank you so much as always to em for the beta read! the usuals: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 24 Jan 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-021/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-021/i reserve the right to title a different chapter after this bible verse, and also to write a different chapter about how reuenthal feels about oberstein's eyes lol. sometimes i need more room to work over an idea but it also fits here so i'll put it in here this chapter's pretty short b/c it's really the first half of events on odin during littenheim's invasion. next chapter will belong to somebody else. but we haven't had a reuenthal chapter in aaaages so. one guess as to who the captain was who visited elfriede lol elfriede thinks that she is out of the labyrinth. she is wrong. reuenthal thinks that there's no way out of the labyrinth. he might be right but he has probably arrived at this conclusion for the wrong reasons. thank you so much to em for the beta read as always you can find me on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 17 Jan 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/the-words-graven-in-the-wall-with-a-nail-were-still-legible-in-1848/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/the-words-graven-in-the-wall-with-a-nail-were-still-legible-in-1848/merry [belated] christmas and happy [belated] new year xiari! i was originally going to hold this off until the 15th, but a) i hate sitting on completed fic and b) I saw that you had already posted your gift on christmas, so it felt very unfair to continue to make you wait 😅. i really hope you enjoy! the somewhat unhinged title is from les miserables vol 5, book 1, ch 2 "What Can You Do In the Abyss But Talk", which discusses what the characters at the barricade do during the night before they die. One of them, Feuilly, takes the opportunity to write some graffiti on the wall. The graffiti in les mis reads "VIVENT LES PEUPLES!", but it is the reader's choice if that is what Konev writes :) if it is what he writes it's, you know, the permanent marks of life as contrasted with poplan's transient marks of death. but of course. um. anyway i love iserlohn lol. boy you really sure can tell i'm an engineer by day in this one 😅😅😅 I think I wanted to have this conversation be longer when I originally started, but I really do like leaving things half said or unsaid haha. I don't think Poplan is really the type to openly discuss his own grief and fears about leaving, even with Konev (who clearly feels some type of way himself). so i hope this still feels satisfying to read. as usual, i'm @ javert on tumblr, @ natsinator on twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co, and https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu Mon, 09 Jan 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-020/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-020/the title is a bit of a misnomer lol since this chapter's action hinges on the fact that they are in interstellar space, but i really wanted to have a "the battle of xyz" chapter title for the first real shots of the civil war haha i find spacebattles so hard to write you guys you don't even know... this was struggle city. but i hope it feels both true to the way logh does spacebattles and also interesting/fun to read/true to the way i like to write :p do i know how the ships are supposed to work in logh? no lol. so i feel free to make up my own worldbuilding there. oh no you know what i've done in this chapter? gotten attached to my sad little failson OC lmao. here's the thing about logh: all the people who are sympathetic are also supposed to be extremely brave and stoic all the time. but i like to sympathize with people who are not that sometimes lol anyway... new year new chapter haha. sorry for disappearing for like two months! i have been writing some stuff in the meantime, which i highly encourage you go check out. it's good! those things are - [*Pictures of Decency*](https://archiveofourown.org/works/43804719), a 45k word canon-compliant novella about Yang, Jessica Edwards, and Jean Robert Lapp, set between the Spiral Labyrinth gaiden and Overture - ["A War From Which There Is No Discharge"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/43650258), a canon-compliant short fic about how Schenkopp ends up tutoring Julian to be a soldier. Set between e16/17. - ["That Which Remains In the Absence of a Confession"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/43242553), an experimental fic about the question "did Reuenthal's dad kill his mom?" and the fallibility of memory Would love if you checked those out 💙💙 in terms of the schedule for this story-- i have one other short fic commitment that i have to write before i can write the next chapter, but after that i don't foresee any major breaks for the remainder of this story. so sorry for my sporadic upload schedule 😅 life is. you know. lmao. i hope everyone had a wonderful new year, and i'd just like to thank you all for coming with me on this journey for another trip around the sun 💙 i hope you're all enjoying it still haha. thank you so much as always to em for the beta read! socials: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuFri, 06 Jan 2023 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/a-war-from-which-there-is-no-discharge/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/a-war-from-which-there-is-no-discharge/sorry that i'm incapable of writing yang/schenkopp fics where anything "happens" lol. the title is from Ecclesiastes 8:8. "There is no man that hath power over the spirit to retain the spirit; neither hath he power in the day of death: and there is no discharge in that war; neither shall wickedness deliver those that are given to it." a loadbearing component of this fic is that i have been reading Thomas Mann's *The Magic Mountain*. Highly recommend. Anyway in that book two characters have a gay little child custody battle for the main character's soul. ofc Yang is not Settembrini, and good lord is Schenkopp not Naphta, but, you know. Julian can be a delicate child of life. as a treat. there's i guess a lot of other things that could be said about this fic but i should refrain. i think it pretty much stands up for itself haha. i just like to talk this was not the fic i originally set out to write for yuletide 😅 i'm like 30k words into a 50k yang/jessica/lapp fic and we'll see if it can get finished by christmas to actually go in the collection lol. hopefully this is a suitable replacement anyway >.> thank you so much to smithensy and ren for the beta read! and for everyone on twit telling me to write yang/schenkopp for the culture lmao since it's yuletide i shan't link my socials but tbh i presume you all know where to find me Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-004/New chapter of Pictures of Decency.Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-002/New chapter of Pictures of Decency.Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-003/New chapter of Pictures of Decency.Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-001/New chapter of Pictures of Decency.Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-005/New chapter of Pictures of Decency.Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-006/New chapter of Pictures of Decency.Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-008/New chapter of Pictures of Decency.Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-009/lol rip i can't embed a video in the author's notes? anyway chapter title is from [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OS0Tg0IjCp4)Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/pictures-of-decency/ch-007/New chapter of Pictures of Decency.Sun, 25 Dec 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/that-which-remains-in-the-absence-of-a-confession/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/that-which-remains-in-the-absence-of-a-confession/and happy thanksgiving to the rest of you americans lmfao. we love a cheerful family narrative for this holiday gathering. i'm sorry(?) that most things i've written this year have been (generously) "experimental" or (more realistically) "completely unhinged" lol. it's kinda fun to try to be more literary but jesus it takes some real effort so i doubt i could sustain this type of playing around for more than the length of a oneshot. you can all breathe a sigh of relief. i've really always loved second person though... it's so fun to write... anyway the idea of this fic came to me because i was searching the back of my own memory for anything Chief might have wanted, and i remembered "reuenthal therapy crackfic" and i was like. well ok i'm physiologically incapable of writing crackfic, but I could probably engineer a serious fic in which reuenthal is forced to interact with a mental health professional. maybe after his mom dies?: but how would he actually react to that? oh he literally wouldn't tell them anything. and then from there i thought about how, boy, isn't it Really Fucking Weird that we get two different (and contradictory) Reuenthal mom death scenes? there's the one that reuenthal dreams in the beginning of e46 (the police photographer taking pictures of his mother's dead body, with his father sitting in front of the crooked picture), and the one in e93 that Reuenthal remembers (of her being dead on the bed). so i wanted to play around with the fallibility of memory, especially for things that maybe you're trying to forget. it was fun to play around with the multiple layers this fic is operating on: what actually happened, what child reuenthal is thinking about the events (and why he's acting the way he does), and the way that adult reuenthal is interpreting those memories. all of these layers don't necessarily match one another. hopefully that's obvious in the way that reuenthal's own narration directly conflicts with various other things lol. i don't really like the title for this fic but i don't have anything else to replace it with? half tempted by "I thought I saw an eagle, but it might have been a vulture, I never could decide" from Leonard Cohen's song "Story of Isaac" but that feels even clunkier... idk maybe i'll change the title later lol anyway this is a weird and complicated fic and i'd love to hear your thoughts on it if you have any! thank you so much to ren for the beta read. as always, you can find me on tumblr @ javert, twitter @ natsinator, discord @ https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu Thu, 24 Nov 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/to-love-the-stars-more-fondly-and-not-be-fearful-of-the-night/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/to-love-the-stars-more-fondly-and-not-be-fearful-of-the-night/i 💙 writing sad gay fanfiction about two ultra minor characters who die offscreen in a 90s sf novel that doesn't even have an ao3 tag yet lmao. this is probably the nichest thing i've ever written lmao. I'm just interested in these two. They were never mentioned without each other in the first part of the book really, but then they got split up :( Anyway there wasn't much to base their personalities on, except that they were the types who would spend time and a whole lot of money making this elaborate construction. I personally wanted to see it play out in the book, but we didn't get that, so I'm here to fill in that blank for you you can find me on tumblr @ javert, twitter @ natsinator , gayspaceopera.carrd.co, or join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu Sun, 30 Oct 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-019/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-019/[American Psycho voice] Very nice. Now let's see Nat Rome's takes on Art. chapter title is from Matthew 24:36-44. figured it was appropriate since everyone in this chapter is waiting for the other apocalyptic shoe to drop, and several people get unexpected guests welcome to the story a new group of randos haha. every time i introduce new characters it's like oh no now i've got new guys whose arcs i have to juggle... "noodle why do you write so many characters who were sent to horrible Special Ed situations as children?" complicated question to answer. i sure do keep doing it though. uh i thought i had more to say here but i've gone and forgotten it all lmao. you all can do the saying for me. tell me your takes fyi that this story may go on mini-hiatus for november while i work on yuletide fic/some other micro projects that need to get done. i'm not 100% saying that will happen but if i don't post for a month, that's why lol. you'll all be the eventual beneficiaries of said work anyway so it probably doesn't matter but you know. forewarned is forearmed. speaking of writing other things: you may want to check out ["And the Big Wheel Keep On Turning"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/41588007) thank you very very much to em for the beta read! you know where to find me: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , join my discord for many stimulating discussions https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 25 Oct 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/and-the-big-wheel-keep-on-turning/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/and-the-big-wheel-keep-on-turning/ch-001/[From "September 1, 1939" by W.H. Auden](https://poets.org/poem/september-1-1939) Faces along the bar Cling to their average day: The lights must never go out, The music must always play, All the conventions conspire To make this fort assume The furniture of home; Lest we should see where we are, Lost in a haunted wood, Children afraid of the night Who have never been happy or good. The windiest militant trash Important Persons shout Is not so crude as our wish: What mad Nijinsky wrote About Diaghilev Is true of the normal heart; For the error bred in the bone Of each woman and each man Craves what it cannot have, Not universal love But to be loved alone. From the conservative dark Into the ethical life The dense commuters come, Repeating their morning vow; "I will be true to the wife, I'll concentrate more on my work," And helpless governors wake To resume their compulsory game: Who can release them now, Who can reach the deaf, Who can speak for the dumb? All I have is a voice To undo the folded lie, The romantic lie in the brain Of the sensual man-in-the-street And the lie of Authority Whose buildings grope the sky: There is no such thing as the State And no one exists alone; Hunger allows no choice To the citizen or the police; We must love one another and die.Sat, 15 Oct 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/and-the-big-wheel-keep-on-turning/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/and-the-big-wheel-keep-on-turning/ch-002/happy one million words of noodle logh fanfiction lmao. hats off to anybody who's read all of it. i love you. title is from [the mountain goats 'deianara crush'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gO12aPXcpMM) one day in september, you come here you pull my head down and you whisper in my ear and you tell me the sidewalk is as far as the world really goes but that's a secret everybody knows you hold my head in your hands, you say my name how is it that though you say it some twenty thousand times, it's never quite the same? and you tell me that hercules died burning consumed by an article of his own clothing that's something i'd rather not be reminded of!Sat, 15 Oct 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-018/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-018/it's my birthday :3 so i will give you a chapter it's fun to try to come up with solutions to problems that seem a) like something that would happen in logh, b) something that yang would think of, and c) don't make my engineer instincts scream in horror at how little the numbers make sense. anyway yang's patented solution to so many things is "chuck a big rock at it" so i feel justified in continuing to chuck rocks at things lol. Elizabeth has just gotten signed up for "trauma tuesdays". sorry elizabeth! the chess game that braunschweig/flegel and ansbach play is based on [the opera game](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Opera_Game), which is very famous. included here by request ;) it is time for everyone to start killing each other with beams. we can see some of the cracks in the braunschweig camp already. this is not going to be pretty for anyone. thank you very very much to em for the beta read as always hey did you read [The Destruction of the Second Temple](https://archiveofourown.org/works/42029703)? It's my "it's time to talk about the earth church plot" fic. I personally think it's really good and you should check it out if you haven't :^) let me know what you think! [i'd love to hear what you think of this chapter too of course lol] you can find me in the normal places: gayspaceopera.carrd.co , javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , and join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 11 Oct 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-destruction-of-the-second-temple/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/the-destruction-of-the-second-temple/ch-003/New chapter of The Destruction of the Second Temple; or, We Accuse Genocide.Fri, 30 Sep 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-destruction-of-the-second-temple/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/the-destruction-of-the-second-temple/ch-002/New chapter of The Destruction of the Second Temple; or, We Accuse Genocide.Fri, 30 Sep 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-destruction-of-the-second-temple/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/the-destruction-of-the-second-temple/ch-001/New chapter of The Destruction of the Second Temple; or, We Accuse Genocide.Fri, 30 Sep 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-017/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-017/hope you enjoyed yang getting married. the fun times are over. martin my little [combeferre](https://www.online-literature.com/victor_hugo/les_miserables/180/) kinnie... oh no... much of this story is concerned with secret language and the ways that people who know each other well communicate. kircheis writes a poem in a language he doesn't know. the poem is the last stanza of [sappho 16](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sappho_16), which is the same poem that martin quoted in [chapter 14 of servants of the pharaoh](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23878408/chapters/60062248). martin, in his reply, signs his name as the subject of the poem, anactoria. [it's i guess a motif that martin and reinhard both at points use women's pen names haha. but that's neither here nor there.] interestingly, the anactoria poem was written about in a [different poem by swinburne](http://www.telelib.com/authors/S/SwinburneAlgernonCharles/verse/p1/anactoria.html), from which part of the title of this book is drawn (through a long chain 😂) *I would my love could kill thee; I am satiated With seeing thee live, and fain would have thee dead. I would earth had thy body as fruit to eat, And no mouth but some serpent’s found thee sweet.* i feel like i had more to say but i've lost it. title is from [lingua ignota](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTEYzMPdXTM) many thanks to em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @ javert, twitter @ natsinator , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 20 Sep 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/will-the-real-mr-bronner-please-stand-up/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/will-the-real-mr-bronner-please-stand-up/ch-001/I grew up middle class, my parents are still alive and married, and Bronner is named after the soap ;) Thank you to Em for the beta read! you can find me in the following places: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu Fri, 02 Sep 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-016/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-016/it's literally so late and i have to be up so early doing complicated things tomorrow 😭 ok fun times over. kaiser's dying next chapter and shit is about to fully hit the fan. um. yang gets all of 3 seconds to enjoy married life sorry yang. everybody's got so many fucking problems. reuenthal and elfriede... they made me break my fade to black streak b/c they literally cannot have a conversation without being insane and horny about it. he has filled his house with the remnants of his abusive childhood. to keep him insane i fuck him on the floor. speaking of-- yang making a note that elfriede is wearing a dress that is 30 yrs out of date-- that's reuenthal's mom's dress. b/c elfriede knows exactly what buttons to push. still not sure if i'm satisfied with that last scene but it is what it is. maybe i'll come back to it later. anyway everyone is thinking about the moment vs the future and this is causing them all to be sad in 5000 different directions. you may say "man yang sure did get married to magdalena in this chapter and she got like 0 speaking lines" i'm probably going to write a bonus chapter about her in a hot sec so hopefully this lack is not too egregious. sorry maggy ilu. but she is not having overt problems at this wedding lol. unlike everybody else. idk. sorry this chapter took so long it was a struggle and a half. hopefully things will get back on a normal schedule? but i make no real promises lol thank you so much to em for the beta read usual social medias: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 31 Aug 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-015/"With friends like these, who needs enemies?" Sorry for the slight delay in getting this chapter moving lol. I had covid haha. Can't believe after like 2.5 yrs I finally got the plague. I suppose it was only a matter of time u.u Also idk this chapter was just weirdly difficult to write for some reason. usually "reuenthal behaves really badly at someone's dinner party" is my favorite type of scene to write,but I struggled with this one. i think it would have been easier to write from Elfriede POV, b/c then we would have gotten a lot of information that I can only sorta say indirectly here. but my plans for an elfriede chapter were deemed TOO out there so they were scrapped lol. I'll keep her POV in my back pocket in case I need it later. anyway she's gonna be weird and horny and terrible along with reuenthal for the foreseeable future lol. i know a lot of people have been waiting for her to show up. considering that she's hands down one of my fave chars in LOGH, it's incredible that it's taken me um. almost a million words of fic for me to get around to writing her at all anyway considering that the civil war is coming soon, probably everyone in the empire is going to stop having stupid little parties, at least for a while. so i'll have to find a different backdrop for my nonsenses :p i'd love to hear what you all think :] thank you so much to em for the beta read! you can find me in the usual places javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 16 Aug 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-014/lol there's a bunch to say about this chapter i suppose. poor yang is truly learning the meaning of "suffering from success" lol. hilde #gender or something magdalena doesn't exactly have cold feet, but for all her quasi-cheerful "well, you've just gotta do it"-ness of previous chapters, she's remembered that the entire reason she started hanging out with yang in the first place was so that she could avoid getting married. obviously the circumstances are very very different than they were back in the beginning of 'servants of the pharaoh' but maggie is still herself. it's not that she doesn't love yang-- it's that Living In A Society is really just getting to her haha. hopefully i have gotten this across semi-clearly, even though no one in any conversation should ever be allowed to speak their minds Mind The Gap, as usual. ([lenny TheYoungPope voice] My Mind Is A Gap) ansbach backstory reveal! i love my horrible boy per the chapter title, the yang - odysseus parallels are in full force. constant descriptions of himself as 'nobody', and we're reminded of his leg scar lol. along with the large numbers of lies he tells in this chapter haha. "why does yang get to be odysseus?" you may ask. well because reinhard has always been achilles (through the transitive property with alexander the great, anyway). it's foils. it's very fun to read the chinese translation of talking without speaking by ChiefAccelerator, because it is reminding me of just how far back some of the themes and imagery that i've been building up stretches. when i was first writing the beginning of this story, i wasn't super consciously building a narrative about lies, specifically. just about the way stories are told. but it's been there from the very beginning in how many times yang lies about things. lies, performances, games, histories, truths... lot going on with this axis of concepts 😂 but that's what i love about writing, especially things that are wicked long and grow in complexity and depth over time-- the way i get to reinterpret and make deeper ideas that have been there from the beginning... ough. anyway i hope you are enjoying being on this ride with me haha oh also in this chapter i am really being blunt about the relationships of power destroying people concept haha. but that's a fun one. i'd love to hear what you all think <3 we're moving swiftly towards the second half of this book. i also really have no idea who is actively reading this story anymore, so pls do say hi. and any of my readers from lofter-- i would love to chat over here 💙💙 thank you so much as always to em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @ javert , twitter @ natsinator , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSun, 07 Aug 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-013/not sure if i love this chapter lol but i'm glad to be free of it. finally we can move on to the actually interesting parts of this book 😅 not that it hasn't had its moments so far, but a lot has been rehashing LOFTT and now we finally get to original material :3c hold onto your hats etc i feel like the thing about hilde is that in the OVA she takes on these roles that aren't always natural to her, because she's trying to be what reinhard needs from her-- she's a replacement annerose and a replacement kircheis at times. and she's pretty good at that. but i think it is not... if she didn't feel like it was something that she was "required" to do, that it was a hole that she needed to fill, i'm not sure that she would behave like that naturally. she's a tempering influence in the OVA, but in a situation where she doesn't need to temper anyone-- her closest relationships in WIAW are the chillest characters around, Yang and Kircheis-- what is her natural state? we know in the OVA she is political and shrewd, and she's not afraid to take risks. nor is she exactly afraid of violence-- at the end of S1 when reinhard's fleets are invading the capital, she's thrilled rather than terrified, even though this is a military attack on her home that will lead to bloodshed. anyway all that is to say that i don't think hilde is cruel or wants violence for its own sake, but i also am not sure she would always take the high road when it's offered. idk. you can disagree with me if you want lol thank you very very much to em for the beta read as always social medias: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 02 Aug 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-012/a very short chapter, but we had to get yang's part out of the way lol i admittedly do love when canon hands me a fun little technical puzzle and asks me how I would solve it. this is one, iserlohn is another, you know. thank you mr tanaka. i do love a brain teaser :3c though probably i'm leaning a little bit hard on "the artemis necklace is not very well designed (or is intentionally poorly designed)" but all of this is extrapolations from what is seen in the OVA-- it is in a rock cloud after all, and not constantly firing on those rocks. so it has to have some kind of target discrimination, unless it's actively tracking every tiny piece of debris in the planet's orbit,which seems... not that feasible :p if you didn't read Keep the Home Fires (Burning), the conversation with Friedrich that Yang is referring to takes place in ch1 of that story. thank you very very much to Em for the beta read as always! socials: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 27 Jul 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-011/tbh i want to be free of the castrop plot lol. it's important for reasons (mostly on the other side of the story lol) but i want to hurry up and get to new content. anyway sorry for the mild cliffhanger. next chapter will probably be pretty short-- it's the "yang fucks up the artemis necklace" chapter. is it a little contrived that castrop owns the same type of ship that yang's dad had? maybe. but-- as so much of this story is lmao-- this is a story about families. and the relationship between yang and his father, and yang and count mariendorf are both important. so for yang, it seems like a nice(?) way to tie those emotional threads together-- yang is now in control of the thing that killed his father, and he can use it to save the man who considers him his adoptive son. also i just needed a way to blow up castrop's ship without violating the plot established on the other side of the story-- this was always the plan after i had muller and reinhard do their little negotiations over there haha. thank you so so much as always to em for the beta read! you know where to find me: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 26 Jul 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-010/tbh not entirely sure what to say about this chapter-- i think it kinda stands on its own lol. hilde is setting herself up for a fall in a major way. ms elizabeth does not have her best interests at heart haha. but i love mess. those of you who have read *lighting out for the territories* obviously already know how this ends haha. i won't spoil it for those of you who haven't, though 😅 not sure if i'm looking forward to writing the next couple chapters or not. i will give it my best effort lol the title is a slight paraphrase from the intro to "animal mask" from this particular tmg show https://archive.org/details/tmg2015-09-12.radio.mp3.128 . tbh animal mask is very much a yang/reuenthal song to me in the context of this story lol but the phrase popped into my head while i was flailing around trying to find a title for this chapter. on that note though, in some ways elizabeth and her fiancee hans (who has yet to show up on screen but will lol) are meant to be pretty direct contrasts between reuenthal and elfriede (who has also not yet shown up... but is certainly on her way!) but more on that later :^) but that is to say that there's some very interesting comparisons that you can make between the various, um, idk, relationships in which weird fucking power dynamics cause people problems. elizbeth herself very much calls attention to hilde being similar to yang here. but i'm saying wayyyyy too much lol. this is what happens when my author's notes aren't actually relevant to the chapter at hand 😅 thank you so much to em for the beta read as always you all know where to find me. natsinator @ twitter. javert @ tumblr. gayspaceopera.carrd.co . discord: https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSat, 16 Jul 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-009/i'm posting this chap while standing on the front of a mountain goats show so if the formatting is fucked that's why lol. i'll fix it when i get to a computer if it is sorry for my absence. i finished the itsoh act 1 rewrite and a bunch of other stuff which you should go read. i'm planning to write the rest of this story straight through now though so i shouldn't vanish again title is about nietzche, who disagrees with me and martin certainly. the opener asked the crowd how to tune his guitar lol anyway a few points of order: there are TWO chinese translations of WIAW available! if you prefer to read in chinese, both translations are linked in the series notes. WTR's translation is only on lofter, and ChiefAccelerator's translation is on lofter and ao3. please say hi to them both! all their work is so impressive ;0; thank you very very much as always to em for the beta read. and shoutout to will, kavka, camille, and kyle for coming to see the mountain goats with me. ilu all lol. we got very soggy i should be back with another chapter sooner rather than later. anyway u know where to find meSat, 09 Jul 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-022/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-022/well! that's a wrap, babes! funnily enough, this has been by calendar the longest it's ever taken me to write a book. I think I started this rewrite in january 2020, and here i am finishing it in july 2022. so 2.5 years. whoops >.> not the idea way to do anything lol. I think there are a lot of things that I could say about the process of writing this rewrite. it was certainly interesting to try to beat existing act 1 into a shape that vaguely functioned. i'm not sure if i completely succeeded. I do think act 1 works well as the first act of itsoh, but does it stand alone as a novel? ehhhhhhhhh ymmv. i think a competent editor (ie someone who is not me) would probably be able to help me fix the structural issues that continue to plague act 1. but at this point in time,that ain't happening lol. i also think that despite the fact that i cut some 100k words from act 1, this draft is probably still too long by, idk, 15-20k words. (especially in the second half i do think it gets a little long in the tooth.) some of those i could probably trim myself, and maybe i will, but again it's one of those things where an outside perspective would help. but even with all that said, I do think that this version of itsoh act 1 is far far far superior to the original act 1, and i think that it's probably very enjoyable to read. i hope that everyone has liked it! while i was writing this book, I basically didn't look at the original at all, b/c i didn't want to accidentally end up marrying myself to old mistakes. so it is probably pretty interesting to see what differences pop out. i actually ended at a slightly different place than the og itsoh act 1 ends, so if you are headed over to act2 of the original to continue the story, i suggest you start with the chapter titled ["the emperor's punishment"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/35494159/chapters/88480762). there are a few continuity changes between the original and new versions, the biggest one that impacts act 2 being that in og itsoh i had the whole war be a state secret that the population did not know about, so this affects some of the plot. but it shouldn't be too jarring tbh, since that was a very minor plotpoint in act 1 anyway. but i guess you will have to also contend with the much older, still figuring out how to do things, style of writing in the original lol. act2 is fun though. it's a radical change of pace :3 as i am wont to do. so. yeah. that's itsoh! thank you so much for reading. I would love to hear what you think! now back to WIAW stuff. I don't know when i will be getting around to the act 2 rewrite, but 2023 i will probably at least start it? we'll see. itsoh is kinda a back burner project for me a lot of the time haha anyway. you know the drill: natsinator @ twitter. javert @ tumblr. gayspaceopera.carrd.co . and discord if you want to chat! https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuMon, 04 Jul 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-021/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-021/only one more chapter! whoooThu, 30 Jun 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-020/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-020/this chapter could maybe use a thorough edit, but [shrug emoji] that is perhaps a problem for future noodle. present noodle is just trying to finish this book before i go on vacation next week. i would love to start with a clean slate, and clear one of my lingering WIPs off my plate lol. anyway, that's why i wrote this chapter in a day. haven't done that in aaages. it was fun though. I should do this more often. But maybe this is one of the Symptoms lol. whatever. if i am manic i am going to ride this as long as possible. because at least when you're manic and getting writing done, you get to take the writing out of the manic episode with you. life hack. um the title in this chapter is the same one i use for every chapter in which yan and halen have their little chats. it's a gordon lightfoot lyric. i saw gordon lightfoot in concert on friday night. it was good except the rest of the audience was the rudest audience i have ever experienced. and i go to a decent number of shows. anyway. my goal is to finish this book this week. wheeeMon, 27 Jun 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-019/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-019/I thought about titling this chapter 'family happiness' and maybe i will go back and change it, but the tmg song 'family happiness' does not really have the right vibes for this like... somewhat miserable slog through everybody's relationships. it's frustrating because everyone involved in all of this is trying their best. but that is not an assurance that everything will work out. next chapter will probably be somewhat less teeth pulling on the relationships between people front, since yan will get to talk to halen again lol. and halen is a literal empath so he's like... actually good at understanding yan's feelings haha. also yan and sid will be reunited with kino. this i'm sure will not lead to conflict :p anyway um. some of this chapter is "lol" if you've read act 2. social medias: javert @ tumblr. natsinator @ twitter. gayspaceopera.carrd.co . https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSat, 25 Jun 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-018/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-018/chapter title from mr Yeats' poem Easter 1916, from which I will probably quote from again at some point ("O when may it suffice? That is Heaven's part") i was originally going to cut the tattoo scene from this book! but multiple people said that it was one of their favorite scenes from the OG act 1, so of course with that ringing endorsement, I had to leave it in. I hope I succeeded in making it perform as a progression of various character arcs and not just as "lol sid gets a tattoo" 😅 i don't reread any of the old chapters when i write the new ones-- i find my 2018 writing pretty unbearably cringe to look at. so i don't actually remember how this scene compares to the original version. hopefully it's an improvement lol anyway aymon shall return next chapter. looking forward to closing out this book. it'll be good to have a book project finished-- i haven't finished a novel since LG@C last november!! christ. too long. anyway. socials: javert @ tumblr. natsinator @ twitter. gayspaceopera.carrd.co . https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 22 Jun 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-017/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-017/this chapter is a little bit beating you over the head with "yan is an unreliable narrator and cannot be trusted to think about other people in a way that is true in any objective sense" lol. hopefully it's fun to read though and not just deeply frustrating. i mean sometimes i do want to shake yan and be like "yan...my darling... your uncle loves you maybe even more than he loves his own kids... stop feeling so weird about this" but of course she can't. it's not /entirely/ her fault-- as is discussed somewhat, later in the conversation with the guild, the academy and taking children away from their families is explicitly done to break family ties. this has done a number on yan in particular. i love yuuni olms. #girlboss. This Is A Secret Tool That Will Help Us Later hm i've gotta run. javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSat, 18 Jun 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-016/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-016/title is from luke 15:8-10 tbf kino was not in the cave for very long. look! foreshadowing! (this will not pay off until the end of act 2). if you know you know or whatever. everyone is having their own fucked up little brain problems in this chapter hunh. lol. kino, the world's most apathetic bisexual, circa age 17, sleeping with her 30 y/o drug dealer b/c it's something to do and takes the edge off. girl... [also the fact that she'll just tell aymon all of this is so funny to me. this is the "servants of the pharaoh yang wenli" life strat] **halen**: i've spent too much of my life torturing people to death, i can't even look at someone vulnerable without knowing exactly how i would kill them. it scares me and it makes it hard for me to trust myself to care for other people **aymon [incapable of not being horny about this]**: not seeing a problem here but ok anyway. javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSun, 12 Jun 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-015/no end notes today i've gotta run i'm lateSun, 05 Jun 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/repairing-the-ravages-made-by-generosity-added-to-love/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/repairing-the-ravages-made-by-generosity-added-to-love/I felt bad going a whole month and not posting anything for logh lol. so i looked through my stack of ideas and pulled out one that i thought would be fun and fairly easy to write. i guess this depends on your definition of "fun" and "easy to write" but i liked it. i'm not sure i'm /completely/ satisfied, but sometimes the thing about conversational pieces is that they don't always go exactly where you wanted them to the title is a line from the gift of the magi, which i do suggest you read if you haven't. it feels to me so extremely like the way annerose and reinhard conceptualize each other lol https://www.gutenberg.org/files/7256/7256-h/7256-h.htm god i'm obsessed with annerose and her problems and the horrible way the story treats her <3 gotta keep this note short b/c i am ruining my thursday by being up this late lmfao um. socials: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu , read the rest of my stuff. yeah. Thu, 26 May 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-014/I thought that this chapter would encompass way more of Kino's Stupid Cave Adventure, but this chapter ended up being way more like. weird aymon/halen vignettes. i'm not sure if it like. works? if it doesn't let me know. but ofc you all like my horrid evil husbands so.lol. anyway i guess this ends on a little bit of a cliffhanger but such is life. i think it helps to stretch out the aymon sections a little, to make them commensurate with the yan chapters not sure i love the title of this chapter either but w/e anyway thanks for reading ilu. socials: javert @ tumblr . natsinator @ twitter . gayspaceopera.carrd.co . discord: https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 24 May 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-difference-between-grasping-and-holding/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-difference-between-grasping-and-holding/when I got my WDLF assignments, I had made a challenge with myself to not toss back what I got, so I was /very/ relieved to see that we had DA as a fandom in common 😅 when i looked through your previous requests, I also saw that you liked space AUs. as maybe the only author of a tom/sybil space au novel\* i was /mightily/ tempted to write a follow up to it, but i decided to spare you lol. it would have been incomprehensible as a gift. so i stuck to canon setting haha the few months when tom and sybil are living in dublin and we see nothing of them are probably the most interesting period in their lives to write fic about. i do so love a story about a fish out of water. but anyway i tried to keep the scope of this story nice and small to stop it from getting completely out of hand. the problem with writing canon setting is that i know a shamefully small amount about history and what daily life was like in dublin circa 1919ish. so apologies for any vagueness or incorrect details anyway, i really hope you like it! it was fun to return to DA briefly. i'm looking forward to seeing the new movie when it finally makes its way to the US \*it's like 1/3 tom/sybil, 1/3 thomas/duke, 1/3 a pairing from the anime it's a crossover with lmao so maybe i'm overselling it. much like the average DA episode, it's highly ensemble Sat, 21 May 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/numberless-army-of-cephalophores/the-intestine-of-the-basilisk/https://nparis.co/works/numberless-army-of-cephalophores/the-intestine-of-the-basilisk/well... it is a story that i have written. i really hope you like it lol. i saw when i was poking through your requests that you like robots, and had once requested a house of leaves fic. and i was like "oh i could definitely write a story about a robot and a haunted house" but of course that quickly got away from me conceptually as i sat on the story and figured out what kind of angle i wanted to take. well, at least it still has robots in it lol i think i probably could have done more on the environmental horror aspect, but by the time i was really getting to the section where the walls were shifting i was like "this is already getting long in the tooth narration wise" so I didn't spend as much time on it as i maybe should have. idk maybe someday i will do a second draft and clean up the first 1/3 to make it slimmer, so that i can put effort into where the horror really is. i'm letting these end notes get away from me too haha. this is not the time and place to do a whole post-mortem on this short story lmfao the title comes from les miserables vol 5 book 2: the intestine of the leviathan, and the concept of roko's basilisk. if you don't know what that is, don't look it up if you're susceptible to scrupulosity about the concept of hell. anyway i really hope you like it <3 i know this isn't what the typical "original work" fic request is but it was fun to write haha. thank you very much for reading many thanks as always to kavka for the beta read <3 Sat, 21 May 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-013/someday i'll figure out how to write formal verse for real for real, and then you'll all be in trouble. this is a combination of several chapters in the OG version-- "the dead on culloden's field" and "the eyes of dr. t.j. eckleburg". because i have eliminated the chapter epigraphs, which used to contain the Red King story at the head of a bunch of aymon POV chapters, i've had to strategically distribute it elsewhere. this is because it is important. on a symbolic level. hopefully it's not annoying to have yan give a quick summary of the salient point here and then just read to us from the book haha. and hopefully this chapter is not /too/ heavy on the melodrama either title is from ovid's metamorphoses: "No form of things remained the same; all objects were at odds, for within one body cold things strove with hot, and moist with dry, soft things with hard, things having weight with weightless things." anyway i want to get this rewrite finished-- i'm tired of it haunting me. so i think i'm going to put some effort into it for a while. we'll see if that plan holds water um. find me @ javert on tumblr, @ natsinator on twitter , and gayspaceopera.carrd.co . also: join my discord! https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuMon, 16 May 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/ive-seen-the-future-i-will-never-be-repatriated/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/ive-seen-the-future-i-will-never-be-repatriated/the prompt was for muckenburger to be actively dying during this scene, but even at the maximum possible age i could fix for him (being ~16 in 745UC when his dad asks for his son to become a soldier as his dying wish) that only makes him about 80 a decade post canon lol. i guess i could have been more flexible on 'decade' and less flexible about 'muckenburger dying' but i didn't want to have schneider spend too long in his horrid depression zone in my heart when schneider goes to phezzan he somehow manages to get a position tutoring 10 y/os Alex and Felix. He knew Yang Wenli, he can pass on his teachings and solid imperial military knowledge. lol. does this belong in "as in a mirror, dimly"? really requesting me to write things that absolutely 3 people will ever want to click on <3 thanks guys love ya lol title is from the handsome furs song ['repatriated'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJOFwJP6B_U) follow me on twitter @ natsinator , on tumblr @ javert , see my writing @ gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu Sat, 23 Apr 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-body-without-organs/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/the-body-without-organs/BOY i had forgotten what a slow paced movie 2001 is lol. it took me /several/ sittings to get through so I could write this lol. it's a great movie but oh my god. i have many other thoughts on it that did not make it into this fanfiction such as: i think the rotating rings are way too small to be actually functional as gravity rings and lmfao how much money did IBM and GE and all these other companies pay for the prominent product placement. it's really funny to me. anyway i am, admittedly, a little tiny bit obsessed with "oh my god the space ship is sentient and that's its body and we're all inside of it" b/c the question of what is a body and what is a mind and what does it mean to have or be each of those things is like... so fundamental haha. so i was glad to have a chance to play with this. i almost wrote about how in ye olden days when someone was getting a lobotomy, they'd be made to recite the Our Father while it was happening so that the person performing it would know how much cognitive function was being retained, and this felt analogous to the scene when HAL is getting disconnected and he's singing 'daisy', but I couldn't figure out how to structure it. i'm not entirely sure if i structured this one well either, but there's not... a ton you can hang a plot for a fanfiction off of in that movie lol. i did my level best so i hope you like it 😅 the body without organs is a philosophy thing that no one can agree on what it means. but i think... it makes a good title. thank you to kavka for the beta read! thanks for reading <3 Mon, 04 Apr 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-008/[fyi, there's an extra scene that takes place at the end of this chapter... lol](https://archiveofourown.org/works/41588007) This Action Will Have Consequences well, some of you have been waiting for this for um. 700k words. so here it is lol. treason threesome treason threesome treason threesome mea culpa on the fade to black. i'm working so hard to keep this series rating low so that as many people can read it as possible lol. anyway the threesome is an exercise for the reader's imagination lol. you're welcome to write it yourself. maybe someday after i finish this series i'll go back and just write all of the sex scenes that i have omitted 😅 anyway this is essentially the pivot point upon which the second half of the story rests. so yay for making it to the halfway point? this feels ridiculous to say lol. please let me know what you think :3c i love to hear from you all thank you very very very much to em for the beta read. telling me to fix this half of the chapter was a good decision haha. social medias: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSun, 03 Apr 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-007/this was actually supposed to be the first half of a much (much) longer chapter, but Em convinced me to let this half out into the wild, and hold back the second half to add more to. this was a good suggestion, but it unfortunately means that i lied to people when i said that mittermeyer/oberstein/reuenthal would be appearing in this chapter. they were. but then this chapter became two chapters lol. anyway that second half is already written, but it needs some work. so should be coming in a day or so-- you don't have long to wait anyway. also, since DNT is actively coming out, I suppose i should keep writing this story instead of dipping to go work on my original fiction lol. sorry to the two people who also read *every hateful instrument* and want to know what happens in that story. so i guess i'll be chugging along here until DNT is concluded at least. tell all your DNT watching friends to read this story :p they'll love it not actually a ton to say about this chapter lol. poor kircheis is having A Time. baby's first murder + the appearance of annerose + complicated feelings about martin and yang. i don't think yang/kircheis works in the context of this story (yang is too cognizant of the fact that kircheis was his student lol. it would be awkward) but anyone who ships yang/kircheis can consider this scene food anyway lol. kircheis is half naked and they're drinking on his bed haha anyway, as i said, next chapter coming in a day or so, give or take. thank you very much to em for the beta read! socials: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , join my discord if you want to chat https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuThu, 31 Mar 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-006/hiiiiii annerose <3 my beloved. the equivalent chapter on the other side of the story (lighting out for the territories ch6) is fun b/c when yang and kircheis show up the reader gets to be like omg it's yang and kircheis. but here you get to be omg it's annerose. go girl do axe murder it's hilarious that annerose and kircheis have their baby's first murder on the same day lol. same hat. i think this scene is sorta equivalent to the hbshbl gaiden scene where kircheis and schenkopp duke it out lol. i love hbshbl. best gaiden by a mile and a half. now that we have established a kircheis = pylades connection you may of course look forward to "orestes drunk and pylades fasting" (reversal intentional) chapter coming... later this book probably :p [technically orestes should probably be reinhard, seeing as annerose gets to be iphegenia, but reinhard doesn't get to hang out with kircheis in this book so somebody else will have to work as a substitute :^) ] not actually that much to say about this chapter lol. i'm going to write one (1) more chapter of SMST before i go back to writing my original fiction for a hot second. gotta resolve this mini cliffhanger haha thank you very very much to em for the beta read! social medias: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 16 Mar 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-005/feels good feels natural to increase the length of this story by ~50% in one chapter lol. i'm not sure how successful this chapter actually is. a lot happens in it kinda? but none of it is particularly fleshed out lol. the problem is that all of these events are really reinhard & annerose events on the other side of the story. the next arc after this (the castrop arc) will be the opposite. reinhard covers that in one chapter over in LOftT, but it's going to take quite a lot on this side of the story to get through (that's the hilde-kircheis competency arc :p so look forward to that in a few chapters) anyway. this is all really just setup. but i'm having fun with the weirdo yang-ansbach relationship. there are a lot of interesting interpersonal relationships in this story (SMST) in particular, but theirs is one that's fun to play with b/c it's going to be a driving force of a non-trivial number of events in this book. also it's just-- i really like having this minor antagonist from book 1 come back to be a more complicated and developed figure later on. #growth. speaking of relationships, hilde is playing with fire for sure. elizabeth and her various relationships with the cast will also be important going forward so keep an eye on that i guess lol. Em told me that it would make sense for elizabeth to have an arranged marriage situation going on, which i wholeheartedly agree with, so i have constructed one. Mr. Hans von Vering is an OC b/c I didn't have any suitable canon characters of the correct age + station to pair her up with. He'll be important later :3c did you read ["First As Farce"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/37317859)? It's a bronner & martin sidestory. and have you checked out the [WIAW art archive](https://archiveofourown.org/works/37303681)? if you want your art featured in it, drop me a line and i'll stick it in social medias: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuFri, 04 Mar 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/first-as-farce/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/first-as-farce/ch-001/I'm sorry I know this is literally unhinged. But sometimes it's good for the soul to spend a day writing hot nonsense that I do not think a single other person in this universe will care about lol. The idea for this short story has just been living in my brain for MONTHS (the note in my secret ideas channel in my discord where I write down all my terrible ideas dates this one to at least december) and now is as good of a time as any to get it out. At least you can rest assured that I will never write another script format work again b/c the formatting is litcherally so miserable. In some ways, this fic is the spiritual twin to both "To Love That Well Which Thou Must Leave Ere Long" and "A Funeral Shroud for Laertes" but in different directions lol. I might at some point in the future edit this to make the closing scene stronger. I'm not sure I have a future in screenwriting lol b/c it feels a little weak to me as it is. But I wanted something to post so. I'm getting a more well rounded literary education simply by virtue of wanting to talk about literature in my silly little fanfictions lmao. Chat with me on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . I've temporarily banned myself from social medias to try to get my life together. Tue, 22 Feb 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-004/reinhard and annerose got an epistolary chapter in Life Out of Balance, so Yang and Muller can have one here lol for anyone who didn't read Lighting Out for the Territories (ie the reinhard story that covers these events) i hope all of this is comprehensible and doesn't feel like it's coming out of absolutely nowhere lol. all of this takes way way way more time on that side of the story, since reinhard (and annerose) are the ones actually doing things the mental image of yang reading reinhard's stupid little economics blog and being like "aw i have a weird fondness for this deeply strange guy" and later reinhard reading yang's history book and going ???? at the whole thing is such a fun thing for me to think about. yang has a much more positive image of reinhard than reinhard has of yang lol what's also funny is thinking about yang and muller's little correspondence in the context of the singular conversation they have in the OVA where they lament that they weren't on the same side. yang is going to be so deeply annoyed at muller when [redacted for spoilers on the other side of the story. if you know you know.] anyway glad to be back writing this! i'm going to do 2 more chapters before going back to my original fiction, Every Hateful Instrument, which you should absolutely definitely read (it's posted on ao3/rr). it's very good if i do say so myself! thank you very much to em for the beta read! socials: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSun, 13 Feb 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-013/it took way too long to get this chapter written but such is life lol. this is another one of those "well in ItSoH i make you wait like hundreds of thousands of words to get this information" chapters :p the emperor is so so questionable lol. aymon is going to be so incredibly pissy that hail is willing to be friends with frae lol. frae is a poor substitute for grace, but like, she's also the one person in hail's general vicinity who completely lacks the wherewithal or desire to have his whole family murdered. this is a positive trait in hail's book lol. all of these people are so messy lol. anyway hail obviously lacks the context to understand but the knife herrault is fiddling with is the jalena knife. symbols. i'm sorry to report that this story is going on mini-hiatus until i finish the next 3 chapters of *serpent's mouth, serpent's teeth*. shouldn't take too too long but you never know lol. but i shall be back sooner rather than later. did you see the picture i drew? :) thank you very very much to em for the beta read! social medias: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSun, 06 Feb 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-012/farewell kicks aymon out of the shuttle b/c they're both disgusted by aymon's whole schtick and by feeling kinda :| about realizing that their own first impulse to jump to is torturing people. poor farewell. they're having a very rough time of it we're now finally past the point of "things that i kinda covered in og itsoh" whoo. incredible that i managed to take 12 chapters to communicate things that i covered in 3 in the original... well. this is meant to stand alone and the original 'home of the past' chapters had the entire structure of itsoh preceding them to hold them up worldbuilding wise haha. idk my pacing might be not ideal still. but i'm looking forward to writing new things! despite the struggle that these recent times have been. probably only one more chapter before i put this story back on mini-hiatus and write a chunk of chapters for *Serpent's Mouth, Serpent's Teeth* thank you very very much to em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator , @ gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuThu, 27 Jan 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-011/heyo welcome back. as i think i said, my plan is to alternate chunks of chapters between this story and *Serpent's Mouth, Serpent's Teeth*. I'll probably write 2-3 more chapters of this story before switching back over. is this the most efficient way of doing things? idk but we're giving it a try. i want to maintain forward motion on both stories at least lol this chapter was originally going to be much longer, but I decided this was a fine place to cut it. next chapter will be the return to emerri (which of course means the return of obra and the herrault family... and meeting the emperor for the first time :3 ) despite being doped out of his mind on like 4x the recommended dose of [basically] an antipsychotic with an off-label use, hail remains an incisive judge of character haha. i think it's better to get these chapters from aymon's pov, but maybe i'm wrong about that? so much behavior from aymon of course but what else would you expect from him. to be fair to him, he does not understand exactly how needling half the shit he says actually is (hunger gives glory to satiety... talking about God's-Grace...) but hail certainly can interpret these things as calculated digs. i actually really like aymon despite/because of everything about him. but lmao. he's a lot. hail getting red wine dumped all over his nice clean shirt is of course mean to be a callback to the events of a few chapters previous. i have watched far too much legend of the galactic heroes it's wine symbolism hours every hour the chapter title is a riff on 'sinners in the hands of an angry god' which i reserve the right to use as an actual mirroring chapter title later. thank you very much to Em for the beta read! my socials as usual: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co . hey, tell all your friends about this story!Fri, 21 Jan 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-003/happy birthday kircheis? lol *martin's found an old trunk of stage makeup in the basement and he's sending it along! we could always use more makeup* this chapter was weirdly difficult to write and i also feel like the conversations are an awkward length. hm. well it is what it is. i think most of the actual parts of this chapter speak for themselves though. soon we'll get some actual action 🤞 and now it's time for this story to go on a mini-hiatus so i can write three chapters of [Every Hateful Instrument](https://archiveofourown.org/works/33371965) which i am kinda in a hurry to finish. I think that alternating decent chunks of chapters will be good for me. if you haven't read EHI and you like this series... you will like EHI. I can pretty much promise that you will enjoy it. it's got a) gay people who make extremely questionable life choices b) galactic politics c) fraught family relationships d) thinking about what it means to be a tool for someone else e) misusing your magic powers for horny reasons anyway please read EHI and tell me what you think about it anyway. I'll probably be back to this story in ~2 weeks but why not entertain yourself with that in the mean time :p thank you very much to em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator , at gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuFri, 14 Jan 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-012/happy [slightly belated] forth birthday itsoh ;0; here's a chapter of the rewrite to celebrate. i can't believe it's been so long. i've been working on this story since early january 2018 the chapter title is from kubla khan by samuel taylor coleridge the conversations in this chapter are obviously a bit different than the ones in the original version, but that's probably for the best. i think this one is spicier in a way that's probably for the best. there will be a second bookend kino convo after Kino's Cave Adventure, but that won't be until the next chapter on this side of the story i think the date continuity for when kino vs yan events happen is actually a little messed up, but shhh. i'll fix it someday. the original version's next chapter is 'the cool darkness underground' https://archiveofourown.org/works/35494159/chapters/88479829 socials: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu , gayspaceopera.carrd.coMon, 10 Jan 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-002/i know that some of you have been waiting for this particular event for a while this is simultaneously the perfect job for yang and also yang's literal nightmare hell job. sorry yang. we'll get to see more about yang's civil war planning as things progress, but for now we've got kircheis drama lol. i hope this plot point does not feel /too/ abrupt for people who have only been reading the empire side of the story! this was a whole thing on reinhard's side. for those of you who haven't read that half yet, i don't want to spoil what happens in it, but there's /significant/ crossover plot points between the two story halves. i want to talk about it but I'll restrain myself :p it's the return of bronner! love him or hate him, he's bringing something to the table. might not be good. might be bad. but it's certainly on the table. i think his theater metaphors might be pushing the bounds of silliness but look. i am allowed to have a silly man whose speech patterns amount to "hi there's Theme happening in this book. did you know?" lmao. he should go hang out with ms kino "cinema" mejia over in ItSoH (they would hate each other and drive each other insane). the letter from belgium b-side is "attention all pickpockets" *In comes you, not the same person I knew Looking roughly the same but something hungry getting restless in your brain [...] So there I go, not the same person that you used to know Peeking through the fish-eye lens at you* but i reserve the right to title a different chapter after this song at some point in the future it's a bit of a nasty web that is being woven here i am not going to lie lol kircheis keeps that photo of reinhard at his desk at work b/c martin would be annoyed if he kept it in their shared bedroom lmao i feel like there was something else I was going to say? i've forgotten it completely. thank you very much to em for the beta read! my social medias are as follows: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSat, 08 Jan 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/serpents-mouth-serpents-teeth/ch-001/I'm so glad to be back... it's been about a million years (six months? something like that). Thank you for sticking around during my hiatus from this story. If you haven't, go check out some of the stuff I've written in the interim (*Last Gasp at Calama*, *Every Hateful Instrument*, and various other short fics) This story is titled after a couple different things. First, it's from the Mountain Goats song "Rain in Soho" *No promise sweeter than a blood pact Nothing harder to go through with than a vanishing act No morning colder than the first frost No friends closer than the ones we've lost Nothing sharper than a serpent's tooth Nothing harder than the gospel truth Though you repent and don sackcloth and try to make nice You can't cross the same river twice* JD is actually misquoting King Lear here ("How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child") second, it's named after-- ok, hear me out here-- one of my fic writing inspirations is the absolutely stupidly long HP fic series *The Sacrifices Arc*, the second book of which is called *No Mouth But Some Serpent's*. the thing is 3 million words long and i've read it cover to cover twice >.> third, of course, yang's side of the story has a running imagery about speaking/silence, while reinhard's side has light imagery (we've got a "sound and vision" theme going on lol-- in case you weren't aware, the next two books will be named "silent spiral" and "lightless labyrinth" respectively). i also thought the assonance between "servants" and "serpents" was just really good-- much like "life" and "light" gets on the other side. anyway a lot of thought went into this title so i hope you like it 😅 as far as content of the chapter-- this is very much a "hey remember all these people had stuff going on?" chapter lol. so it's pretty low-key, but it does introduce several of the major plot points. that we'll be starting off the section with, so i think it's fine. if you have read *lighting out for the territories* you know where this is going, at least in part haha hilde gets to be POV for this chapter b/c she is probably going to have the most interesting relationship with our presumptive future kaisarin :) also she's going to have pov chapters later for [thing that was covered in LOftT] if you haven't read the alliance side of the story, I'm actually really interested in how you feel about this one haha. this is where the timelines really start to converge, so it will be interesting to see how ppl feel about it from the other side. hopefully this story will be less horrid to write than LOftT was speaking of timelines converging, yang's comment about everyone celebrating he same night is very prescient. we see both reinhard and fredrica attend their equivalent new year's parties on the other side of the story :) i did mean to have this chapter for NYE but the best laid plans of mice and men etc etc etc. i intend to work on this story in alternating 3-4 chapter chunks with *Every Hateful Instrument*. we'll see how that goes. i have a burning desire to finish them both thank you to em for the beta read! my socials are as usual natsinator @ twitter, javert @ tumblr, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and join my discord server https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuMon, 03 Jan 2022 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/to-love-that-well-which-thou-must-leave-ere-long/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/to-love-that-well-which-thou-must-leave-ere-long/merry belated christmas/happy early new year kat! as requested, a gaiden-era reinhard/kircheis fic for you. if i knew more about opera, or thought it would be realistic in the least to make all of these people sing, I would have had them do an opera for you, but I don't, sadly. you could also picture the crackfic version of this in your head where they perform cats: the musical :p i'm... not entirely certain how successful this fic is on a conceptual level haha. i think there's a lot of good ingredients (the audience understanding of tragedy, homoeroticism, the historical context of soldiers doing drag performances/shakespeare plays originally being performed by all men, etc) but i'm not sure that i managed to pull it together coherently. this is probably one of those fics that could really use a second draft, but I am /shamefully/ late on this already, so it is what it is haha. maybe someday i will write a second draft. there are some interesting bones here the title is not from R+J, it's actually from sonnet 73. https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45099/sonnet-73-that-time-of-year-thou-mayst-in-me-behold this is probably the last thing i'll post before the new year, so i shall see you all in 2022! as usual, my socials: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu Wed, 29 Dec 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-010/merry christmas to everybody who celebrates :) well... fifty something thousand words into my silly little romance novel, the two main characters finally meet each other lol. this brings us to about the 1/3 mark of the story, and is as good a place as any for me to take a mini hiatus. I'm still going to be actively working on this story, but first, i need to write my logh secret santa gift (i procrastinated...) and also i'm planning on writing the first chapter of the next section of Wheel Inside a Wheel to post on NYE/new years, for thematic reasons. after that, i'm probably going to alternate between this story and the next WIAW section in chunks of a couple chapters. i feel a real urgency to get this book done, but i also want to go back to WIAW lol. it's been long enough and people are waiting for that story. so we'll see how i manage to balance it as far as this chapter goes-- em provided some really helpful pointers towards fixing it (thank you so much as always) and i think that helped a lot, though i'm still not entirely sure if it's the best it can be. i think this is one of those "beat it into shape on the next draft" chapters, but my desire at the moment is just to Post things (perhaps this is to my detriment lol). i also cut a whole aymon chapter from the outline, so that might be contributing to some of the slightly off feeling i have about the action scene. i don't know if i've developed aymon's motivations for mercy here enough. but i guess we'll cover that next chapter? it's a little messier than i would like i think the title is from [the mountain goats song 'to the headless horseman'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgsTTVzA22E) thank you again to em for the beta read <3 my socials: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSun, 26 Dec 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-009/well idk what to say about this one really. i think it speaks for itself for the most part lol. the shaving scene was added on a total whim-- i thought of it while laying in bed-- but i think it works. the complicated relationship between a man and the telepathic clone of his own brain in a jar... fun to compare/contrast this with yan in itsoh act 2 i think. i miss yan... she who is not appearing in this novel. anyway next chapter aymon and hail finally meet! 50000 words into this romance novel in which they are the main characters lmao. innovations in the romance novel form, truly. let me know what you think! thank you very very much to em for the beta read :) my social medias are as follows: javert @ tumblr, natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.coWed, 22 Dec 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/a-somewhat-larger-death-indeed/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/a-somewhat-larger-death-indeed/i don't think this story is particularly good, nor do i have very much to say about it lmao. i've never written a "wouldn't it be fucked up if \_\_\_" story before and now i guess i have. if i had tried, maybe i could have come up with something approaching A Theme for this story (idk... something to do with secrets?) but i did not make any attempt to do so lmao. i just had an idea and wrote it. so mostly posting this because posting is the only thing that makes me feel alive hey read my other DA fic: Last Gasp at Calama. it's like 80k words long and DOES have actual interesting things to say lol. social media: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co . Thu, 16 Dec 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/can-you-see-that-young-star-overhead-thats-the-one-that-designed-my-undoing/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/can-you-see-that-young-star-overhead-thats-the-one-that-designed-my-undoing/I think the idea of this story, in some form or another, has probably been rattling around in my head for years, and I'm grateful to have the opportunity to get it out on paper. the thing about young wizards is that it's a very standard CS Lewis style catholic apologetics, and there's like... all of these uncomfortable holes and edges that apologetics tries to smooth over but really only ever draws attention to. my particular flavor of obsession makes me always want to stick my fingers in those wounds. i don't think that diane duane is ever going to write 'attack and dethrone god: the novel' but it would be fun if she did. this fic is an attempt to play with addressing "the question of evil" in a way that feels grounded within the spirit of the series. i hope it works on some level haha. i'm not sure if i completely managed to fill the spirit of the prompt, but I hope you enjoy it anyway. it is a way for the lone power to bring about a fall, anyway haha in the NME timeline, Nita is exactly my age. in an allowable moment of self-indulgence, I have made her attend college at my alma mater, and study physics with all of my friends who were physics majors. none of these friends are shown, and the college is not mentioned by name, but It Is Known. it's not an unreasonable place to attend for a girl interested in astronomy who wants to study physics, but who got good-to-mediocre grades in high school due to Compelling Circumstances Outside Her Control :p the title is from [California Song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMsOa3GcdTE) by the Mountain Goats thank you very much to kavka for the beta read in the spirit of yuletide anonymity, i shall refrain from linking the rest of my work and social medias right now :p Tue, 14 Dec 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-008/two scenes to balance the tightrope of "holy shit aymon is horrible" but still giving him enough warmth to justify existing as a main character of this narrative lol the title of this chapter is of course from "Amazing Grace" for obvious reasons *when we've been here ten-thousand years* *bright shining as the sun* *we've no less days to sing God's praise* *than when we'd first begun* i'm excited to write next chapter, but I'm not sure when i'll be able to get to it since i've got nine mbillion other things on my plate this month. we'll see. i think although i am going to start SMST in january, i will try to alternate chapters with this story since i really really really want to finish it. but we'll see. i thought about having aymon not wear his spacesuit and just wander around in his uniform the whole time for the #drama of it it all (aymon is nothing if not a drama queen) but i decided that would be a bit too silly lol let me know what you think <3 thank you so much to em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator, the rest of my links are at gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and you can join my discord to chat if you'd like https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuFri, 10 Dec 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-007/this chapter is a rewrite of one that appeared in the original draft of itsoh (the home of the past, part 1). the beats are mostly the same, but i think you can do a side by side comparison and see some major changes in the way that i construct scenes haha. i think the changes are for the best. i liked the original version of this chapter when i wrote it, but it's hard to read, looking back. it's kinda funny-- original itsoh is very much about recognition of the self through the other, that's one of its most major emotional throughlines, so that was the lens i wrote the original looking through. but *every hateful instrument* is about being someone else's tool and what that like. does to you. hateful instruments indeed. [sidenote: i'm thinking about sasha stickpenalties' dreamwidth title 'the body as a tool or a weapon'.] anyway we've got uh something like 24 more chapters to explore that idea so i shouldn't talk about it that much now. it's just funny to reconceptualize this scene with a different narrative focus. the 'in the beginning...' quote is mostly preserved (though rewritten to be phrased better lmao), but it's there that you can see some of the original focus peeking through-- the light has neither form nor meaning nor purpose without the darkness to give it those things not like i'm not always obsessed with the same imagery of negative space...{“Here’s a little tip: sometimes the absence of a thing provides just as much information as the thing itself.” He held up his hands, making a circle with his fingers. “Tell me, Kircheis, is the shape my hands, or the gap in between them?”} i could have drawn out the misery of hail's time trapped in the shuttle, but I think it works better left stark. we leave solitary(ish) confinement as another major idea that belongs more firmly to ItSoH proper than it does here. such ideas of course hit much differently as we approach 2022. how little did i know back in 2019 when i was BLITHELY writing ItSoH act 2 how much of the upcoming year(s) would feel like my own long dark itsoh act 2 of the soul lmao. speaking of! i finally bit the bullet and uploaded all\* of the original itsoh to ao3. if you've been like "i can't believe i have to go to another whole website to read this thing" well now if you have any interest in not doing that, you may remain here haha. the only benefit to reading on RR now is that i did have a few fun convos in the comments that may be worth reading. but that's the context specific nature of internet comments for you anyway, let me know what you think! next chapter, as you may have been able to guess, will not be particularly pleasant. thank you so much to em for the beta read! i'm @ javert on tumblr, @ natsinator on twitter , and the rest of my links are at gayspaceopera.carrd.co . you can also join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu \*minus the one chapter that's a twine game, which must be hosted elsewhereMon, 06 Dec 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-006/i went back and forth on if i should have aymon gender the stardrive as 'she' since the stardrives are the hearts of ships. there's kinda some gender in there tbh! anyway i went with 'it' for reduction-of-reader-confusion reasons, but if you think it would be spicier but not too disruptive to go with 'she' then i can change it back lmao if yan had ever gotten even 1/10th of the chewing out that aymon got, she would be a weeping puddle on the floor. i miss yan. she who is not appearing in this novel. of the trio of yan/sid/kino, if aymon as an apprentice were to be their same age and in their cohort for some reason, i think kino would have been the only one able to even remotely deal with his level of problems syndrome. she's the most willing to just fucking bite somebody. i debated cutting the third scene, but this chapter would be a bit too anemic without it, and aymon's plan for catching hail's ship is interesting enough that it's better to not skim over it. and em told me to leave it in as always, thank you so much to em for the beta read <3 you can find me on tumblr @ javert, on twitter @ natsinator , the rest of my writing is at gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and one can join my discord, should one wish https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 01 Dec 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-005/hello... sorry for putting this story on a mini hiatus while i finished LAST GASP AT CALAMA (which you should go read if you haven't yet-- it's fairly fun haha). but i'm back! for now, anyway. I'm going to try to get as much done on this story in the last, uh, 3 days of november + december in between my various yuletide/secret santa projects that i also need to do. fair warning that this will probably go back on hiatus sometime in january so that i can work on WIAW again. anyway. about the chapter. cleaning out all the sex toys from your dead gf's apartment so her parents don't see them aymon is on his most petty, spiteful behavior here. he's a little shit before he meets halen lol. to be fair: he is Going Through It, but even still, not really an excuse. this is obviously the thing that poisons his relationship with ungarti vaneik for the rest of all time. i hope that i've made clear what exactly the relationship/set of problems is between frae/aymon+obra/herrault (and their sort of counterpart in the vaneik clan). if it isn't clear, please do let me know so i can try to clear it up in the text haha there will be one more aymon chapter before we get back to hail (and finally start the process of them meeting :3c ) anyway, thank you for reading and as always, thank you very very much to em for the beta read. you can find me on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator , and on discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSat, 27 Nov 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-017/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-017/i know the poor downton abbey reader is probably like "noodle, why the fuck have you introduced a new and unknown character in the epilogue, of all things". and i'm sorry. but i love hilde so i thought it was fun to get to sneak her in here. anyway, i hope you have enjoyed reading this story <33 it's been very entertaining to write. i know that it was a bit of a silly premise from the getgo, but i hope that regardless of which side of the canons you came in from, that you've had a good time reading. this fic is structured very much like a downton abbey episode (or couple of episodes) since we've had like intermingling upstairs/downstairs plots, everybody going every which way, disasters happening and then being solved in some of the most anticlimactic ways possible (DA, as much as i like it, does this a lot lol), etc. i hope that i've done both the format and the characters justice. thank you so so much for reading <3 i've really appreciated all of your comments and am very grateful for you all giving this weird story a chance. if you've enjoyed this story, you would honestly probably like my long LOGH fic, [A Wheel Inside a Wheel](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1650067), (even if you have no interest in watching LOGH at all-- it should be just as, or more, comprehensible without canon knowledge as this fic) because it has many of the same elements (i'd describe many parts of it as "a tragedy of manners"). as always, you can find me on social medias: javert on tumblr, natsinator on twitter, and my links are all over at gayspaceopera.carrd.co . you can also join my discord if you like https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuMon, 22 Nov 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-016/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-016/i realized while writing this chapter that honestly, it would work better as the penultimate chapter rather than the final one. probably in a week or so after everybody who's been following this story has had a chance to read it (so that no one gets confused) i'm going to switch this chapter with the previous reinhard one. there wasn't a physical object for thomas and the duke to wrestle over, so i settled for doing something else. when i started writing this chapter, i didn't have thomas dumping the wine all over the duke in mind, but when i got to it i was like "oh, i've set this up so perfectly to mirror the moment when they met, I can't NOT include it" haha philip is, sadly, kinda a dick but hey, at least thomas gets a promotion to like, substitute butler while carson flies away! that's good for him. proceed directly to the next chapter / do not pass go / do not collect $200 (or don't) it's the epilogue. but i think it's a fun little snippet that's worth reading :) and i will likely have some further author's notes there talking about the story as a whole so lol. might as well.Mon, 22 Nov 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-015/sowwy that this chapter took so long. everyone go wish ao3 user smithens a happy belated birthday <3 tom's incoherent politics vs reinhard's simply bad politics: fight! it's funny because they agree on plenty (the goldenbaums and the system of nobility sucks, maybe you shouldn't have a secret police that snatches dissidents off to labor camps, etc) but they're both also. you know. the wishiest washiest socialist vs mr i can be a benevolent dictator, rip to rudolph but i'm different, etc. the old world is dying / the new world struggles to be born / now is the time of monsters i, too, am capable of taking the kircheis knife and twisting it :p you can assume that tom and sybil make it safely to phezzan. what happens to them after that is an exercise for the reader's imagination. next chapter ties up our final lingering plot point: thomas and the duke. oh and robert being pissy that reinhard let his daughter elope (or whatever) without even trying to get her back. but who cares about that lmao. i think this story will also have a short epilogue, and possibly a spinoff short story about richard ellis and annerose :3c the kaiser's valet and the kaiser's, uh, favorite probably see a lot of each other. anyway thank you for reading! socials: i'm on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator , i finally got around to updating my carrd gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and you can join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 17 Nov 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/a-funeral-shroud-for-laertes/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/a-funeral-shroud-for-laertes/ch-001/New chapter of A Wheel Inside a Wheel.Tue, 16 Nov 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-014/logh readers watching lord grantham make life choices are most assuredly like 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬 sadly if there's one thing that robert is known for, it's getting dragged into schemes that cost him quite a lot. the man cannot resist peer pressure and making bad life choices have tom and sybil discussed what they're going to do when they actually get to phezzan? hahahaha they probably should! but all of this is happening under pretty stressful and urgent circumstances so. you know. idk if i'm fully satisfied with the way i've hashed out sybil's motivations in this chapter, but idk-- the actual physical timeline of this story is so compressed (not counting the first thomas chapter, it takes place over like, what, 2 months?) that i didn't think it would really be possible or realistic to have the "we're going to get married because i love him" arc that in the show takes place over like iirc several realtime years (even though it feels much shorter on screen lol). certainly they are interested in each other, and that's part of it the reasoning (even if sybil doesn't really want to admit it to herself) but it can't be the total of her motivations. i hope i've done it in a way that feels both natural and satisfying, anyway. there are two more actual chapters of this story + a probable epilogue. so we're coming right up to the end hahaTue, 09 Nov 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-013/when i started planning out this story, i had a whole laundry list of themes and ideas that I wanted this fic to be About, like "what does it feel like to live in a totally decaying empire" and "uh oh there's gender in there" and "jesus every able man in this country for the past more than a hundred years has been conscripted into an endless, horrific, unwinnable war that exists solely to grind people up and spit them back out, everybody must have just absolutely fucking awful PTSD, if they survive" and various other things. but while some of those have been nodded at, what this fic has really ended up being about, more than anything else, is class. i guess that was somewhat inevitable. LOGH is absolutely /obsessed/ with like what does it mean to be someone's superior or inferior versus being their equal. it's a theme that almost every character wrestles with at some point, and it's probably the most central part of reinhard's arc in the show. if you don't mind spoilers/aren't ever planning to watch LOGH, this theme is best summed up in [this clip from e72 [warning: contains the death of a major character]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BX12NVUhceI) . but logh addresses this concept of class in a weirdly abstract way-- "democracy" as a country of equals vs "autocracy" of masters and servants-- despite having a rich worldbuilding background to tie into. it's one of the things that makes me like rattle the bars of my cage and shriek. and of course downton abbey is Like That. i don't think you need me to go into how DA addresses class lmao. but anyway-- where was i trying to go with this note? i guess Thomas is just always acutely aware of how these divides work, and even at the lowest moment, the Granthams still have more ability to stay safe in this society than Thomas ever will. in other news: we do love a classic "thomas tries to frame bates for something" scheme. too bad kircheis is there being a goody-two-shoes about it lmao. he was obviously sent up there on sybil's behest to warn tom what was going on after reinhard sent them both inside. fucking reuenthal doing his absolute best to ruin the lives of everyone he encounters. i love him but he is a bastard for sure. i was tempted, while planning this story, to make reuenthal duel somebody, but then i couldn't figure out who to make him duel or how to get that to work plot wise, so i had to drop it. reuenthal duel scene coming.... sometime during *Silent Spiral* in WIAW if i'm remembering my plan correctly maybe if i was ever going to write a draft 2 of this story (i'm not likely ever going to do that) i would try to work all those other ideas i missed out on into here haha. i do worry that this story is a bit underwritten-- everything happens very fast and a lot happens off screen. but i hope you're enjoying despite that haha. i'd love to hear what you think. anyway the title of this chapter does come from 'last gasp at calama' (the Mountain Goats song) socials: javert @ tumblr , natsinator @ twitter , gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuFri, 05 Nov 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-012/noodle can have little a animal symbolism... as a treat. for context, please read [Life Out of Balance, Chapter One](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23038624) *[let the good times roll on / through these first few desperate hours](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zx04_5dfJY8)* anyway the deer is a pretty in your face symbol of innocence or goodness / the loss of it basically wherever it gets deployed lol. this is the kircheis of [Untouchable and Golden](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27329341) and [The Children of This World...](https://archiveofourown.org/works/30212391) after all. very gift of the magi for reinhard to not shoot the deer b/c kircheis would want him to, and kircheis to go ahead and do it in order to satsify the social demands of the situation. this isn't related to the c-plot of reinhard moving out of their shared house at all... i'm not totally satisfied with this chapter-- i think juggling too many characters means that there's a bit of dross that probably could be cut. someone sneak into my house with a pair of scissors and just start snipping please. but in the end it accomplishes what it needs to so [shrug emoji]. i hope it's entertaining anyway! this is definitely one that's more meant to make my other loghfic readers lose it :p but we're really heading towards the end now! very exciting :^) anyway socials: javert on tumblr, natsinator on twitter, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 03 Nov 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-011/apologies for the fade to black rather than having a horny scene there lol. i just didn't feel like i had anything particular to say with adding one >.> i leave it as an exercise for the reader's imagination thomas............ you have gotten your heart entirely swept away lol. much like the letters, the photograph is kept for somewhat ambiguous reasons, but he absolutely is going to fall asleep looking at it tom... may or may not be lying here :) or martin is lying to tom. this is also deliberately ambiguous haha. what was Bates doing up? :^) Lord Grantham... is making some bad choices just slightly offscreen. bit of a shorter chapter, but We Have Exited The Chill Zone and entered The Fun Zone. next chapter: the hunt. and reinhard pov makes a reappearance. it's been a while lol. chapter title is from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFX\_gODA-hk thank you for reading <3 i'd love to hear what you think socials: natsinator on twitter, javert on tumblr, gayspaceopera.carrd.co , https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuFri, 29 Oct 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-010/well haha this is in fact the chapter that i built most of the fic around trying to get to, though i'm not sure if i did justice to what i originally envisioned. though of course one never does, and it's always that the product that exists supersedes whatever perfect thing exists in your imagination. i hope this is an interesting chapter for you anyway i'm like fully obsessed with the concept of people pretending to be someone who they're not. and i also just thought that having thomas go to a party like this would be a fun concept haha astute readers will recognize that this is the dancing scene described in THE CHILDRmEN OF THIS WORLD... >:^) welcome to the noodle cinematic universe baybee magdalena is absolutely just. addicted to pot stirring. i love her so much. poor matthew the lone straight\* guy at this party for gay people lmao. it's okay he's a chill man. but also this is going to make him feel even more :// about the duke and mary situation lol i want thomas and sybil to be friends. we were robbed in the show b/c they didn't actually get to hang out that much i would love to hear any thoughts you have! ummm socials: javert on tumblr, natsinator on twitter, my woefully out of date carrd is gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and you can join my discord here https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu \*?Sun, 24 Oct 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-009/you can all see exactly where all of this is going, right? lol this chapter is a bit short but hopefully it's interesting all the way through :) i am trying not to linger too long. DA is somehow even more of an ensemble show than LOGH is, and it relies so heavily on action taking place just out of frame lol-- that's definitely influencing the way I'm writing this fic. god i love martin bufholtz. for anyone who is like "who the fuck is this dude" the answer is that he appears in one singular gaiden episode (granted, it is far and away The Single Best Gaiden Episode, I've watched it far too many times. it's "hundred billion stars, hundred billion lights" e8 btw), has a three minute conversation with kircheis, and then promptly dies offscreen. and in that three minute conversation with kircheis, he managed to completely charm me, so he's a secondary character in my long running LOGH fic, A Wheel Inside a Wheel, where he causes all of my readers to have intensely conflicting opinions about him lol. I'm sure you can see why. anyway in this house we stan a slightly cringe revolutionary. tom branson/martin bufholtz is something that they both mutually would like to happen but also are incapable of making happen.Mon, 18 Oct 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-008/if these scenes don't follow the screenwriting maxim of "start late", they at least do follow the second half: "leave early" lol i want to make a valiant effort to get this fic finished this month which is why this chapter was so fast in coming lol. it was also fairly short b/c i continue to simply move the pieces around the chessboard. maybe i spend too much time on that but eh at least the conversation with kircheis was fun i think haha continuing Kircheis's Great Mistaken Identity Snafu. thomas that man is not a servant he's a captain in the imperial fleet... lol. this confusion is going to continue for a little while longer because i think it's hilarious. kircheis just wants to be friendly b/c he's a nice dude. and i think thomas is remarkably un-spiky to basically anyone who shows him the slightest overtures of kindness (sadly rare...) anyway can thomas drive in DA canon? i don't think so. but it was convenient for the plot for him to be able to here lol. also i made william a city boy instead of the horse girl he is in his heart. i mean he can be a horse girl in spirit too but ykwim. i'm sorry lord grantham, reinhard von lohengramm is not going to marry edith. it is simply not in any cards whatsoever lmao. aaaanyway. socials: javert on tumblr, natsinator on twitter, most of the rest of my writing is here on ao3, and you can join my discord if you like https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuThu, 14 Oct 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-007/a short chapter that i don't have much to say about lol. it mainly serves the function of moving various chess pieces around the board. next chapter is a thomas chapter that should be fairly entertaining. i think this chapter has a few good lines in it. but i'm always so ??? on if i'm getting the DA characters right in terms of characterization. i've watched the first season of the show multiple times to try to get it down but i do not know if i will ever feel confident haha. anyway i hope i'm doing a good job regardless of my lack of confidence sorry this took so long to get out. i don't have any good excuses, only many bad ones that i shall not enumerate here :p anyway: i'm @ javert on tumblr, @ natsinator on twitter. most of the rest of my writing is here on ao3, you should go read it. and you can also join my discord if you like https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 12 Oct 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-011/*speed bonnie boat like a bird on the wing / onward, the sailors cry / carry the lad who's born to be king / over the sea to skye* the *sky boat* is very obviously named after "the skye boat song" lol, as is the chapter title. i'm particularly partial to the corries' version of it [only yan barcarran reduces a pirate to a soup-like homogenate in 30 seconds](http://www.milk.com/wall-o-shame/polytron.gif) yan is beginning to realize that she and halen are just the spiderman-pointing-at-spiderman meme lmao. too bad he's not here right now. anyway yan bby you are Obsessed with that man lol. he's not even in this chapter but yan has to think about him constantly. itsoh is not "hard sf" b/c much of the plot revolves around people who have magic powers lol. but i try to make the rules they operate under clearly defined and have that lead to interesting consequences. so many of the spacebattles in itsoh are interesting b/c when you have a sensitive involved, who can just fucking... cheat at physics... the ways that you have to engage are totally different. you can either read the original draft, or we'll get there... someday... in this rewrite. anyway, in the original version of this scene, yan smashes the shit out of the shuttles with big chunks of rock, but I decided that this was a somewhat more interesting application of the power. yan and sid exploding grapes is of course foreshadowing of things that happen like 2 pages later :p anyway... baby's first murder! for yan and sid. congrats kiddos this was definitively Not the thing I'm supposed to be working on but it's what you get so. enjoy. the usual: i'm on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator . read the rest of my writing here on ao3. join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu the equivalent next chapter in the original version is chapter 25, then skip directly to 28 25 - https://archiveofourown.org/works/35494159/chapters/88479520 (The Flame Which Casts a Long Shadow) 28 - https://archiveofourown.org/works/35494159/chapters/88479727 (Scrubbing the Walls of Chauvet Cave)Fri, 08 Oct 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/morituri-te-salutant/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/morituri-te-salutant/ok, lots to talk about with this one lol first: this work was inspired by reading drcalvin's Les Mis fic, Toil Until the Old Colours Fade, which was recommended to me several months ago by Nick (hailmaryfullofgrace55675 on tumblr). it's a fun fic, if you like les mis and are looking for something significantly more uplifting than this one lol. sue me for liking valvert i guess >.> anyway after reading it, i got this like, unbearable itch in my brain about how I would write about this conceit. les mis is, ultimately, a story that believes in the capacity for human betterment (citizens, the 19th century is great, but the 20th century will be happy), while LOGH is obsessed w/ the cyclical nature of history and the fundamentally unchanging nature of humanity (in every age / in every place / the deeds of men remain the same) there's even like... ok explicitly near the end of the OVA, mittermeyer talks about reinhard "conquering Valhalla" but like... what could that possibly feel like? augh it makes me lose it. i'm not sure what a 'satisfying' afterlife could look like for these people, several of whom have Problems Syndrome that makes them completely unable to be satisfied. idk. anyway reuenthal and kircheis aren't even trying to get out of the cycle, b/c they don't believe that there is a way out so i wanted to talk about like, explicitly being trapped in this circle of destiny and being unable to break out. reuenthal is obsessed w/ playing that role, and kircheis. well. what can we even get out of kircheis' decisions in e26? it's hard to know what he's thinking. tbh one of the strengths of logh as a story is in its concreteness-- when a character is dead, they stay dead, and it's pretty clear that memories of them are not communiques from the afterlife, but are just memories and wishful thinking. it feels a little cheap to me to play with afterlife fic, but hey. i had something i wanted to pick at and this was the medium that gets it lol. written in present tense b/c i think it conveys best the sort of "endless present" of history that they're trapped in this is one of those conceits that's like, it ONLY works as a fanfic. you maybe could do this as original fiction if you worked really really hard, but i think it would not be worth it, and would also come off badly even under the best of circumstances. and be super fucking long. in fanfic you can get to the meat of the horror in 5k words or fewer! lmao. i'd love to hear what you think of this story! thank you very very much to em for the beta read. you can find me on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator, the rest of my writing at gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and my discord server here https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu Tue, 21 Sep 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-004/hiiiiiii aymon RIP to the fucked up apprentice triad that was happening before the beginning of this story. unfortunately for aymon, the solution to every problem is not "be horny about it" but it is the solution that he naturally reaches for most often, for better or for worse the chapter title is of course from a jenny holzer piece IT'S AN EXTRAORDINARY FEELING WHEN PARTS OF YOUR BODY ARE TOUCHED FOR THE FIRST TIME. I'M THINKING OF THE SENSATIONS FROM SEX AND SURGERY. i'm going to be very interested in hearing what people who have not read main story ItSoH think about our two protagonists in this story. people who have already read itsoh would not be here unless they already felt some kind of way about aymon and hail lol. this chapter is probably not particularly interesting to those people, since it's just a copy/paste from an older version of this story that i scrapped and redid b/c i thought the pacing was whack. <3 obra. the next chapter at least will be another aymon chapter, then i think for timeline reasons we will jump back to hail, and then aymon again. thank you to unice for looking over this chapter + everybody who read it the first time around lol. you can find me on twitter @ natsinator , on tumblr @ javert , and my writing is linked at gayspaceopera.carrd.co . you can also join my discord if you like :) https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSun, 19 Sep 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-003/i've talked about this on tumblr extensively but the "the only books about sensitives that hail has access to are highly questionable gay eroticas" come from the following factors - in universe, sensitives can come from any walk of life. this makes for compelling fiction. - they are also a mysterious group of people who the average person will never encounter, but who as a class dictate much of the way the Empire is run. this makes for compelling fiction. - they have freaky psychic powers that the average person will not be intimately familiar with. this makes for compelling (and imaginative) fiction - they are almost all, but not exclusively, gay. this makes for compelling gay romance novels, especially. - most of the entertainment available on board pirate ships is for people who don't have a lot of novelty in their life during their few free hours when they're not working, and spend most of their lives around their families. romance novels (and just straight up porn lmao) are in high demand. - as was pointed out, there's not really any reason for the laity to have textbooks on how the power works. - also, it's just a funny logical worldbuilding consequence [there are probably equal numbers of horny books about pirates, like there are tons of cowboy novels irl or whatever, but hail and his family would probably have zero reason to read any of those lol] anyway hail has now received QUITE the education, if not exactly on the right topic. [to quote pirates of the caribbean] you'd best start believing in horny gay romance novels, mr vinright. you're in one. i do not tease you for like 700,000 words about how stardrives get made in this one :p over in main story itsoh, yan /still/ hasn't figured it out lol there is power in a factory / there is power in the land / there is power in the hands of the worker / but it all amounts to nothing if together we don't stand / oh there is power in a union i kinda miss writing the silly little folk song epigraphs in main story v1 itsoh. i don't think they add enough to justify their existence, but they were a fun touch. occasionally they were used to play against something in the story but not often enough lol grace loves to *stress* her words in an annoying way. i figure i'm allowed to give one character an overdone italics quirk :p next chapter five year timeskip because i'm not going to spend a million years wasting time in this story >.> aymon arrives next chapter! which i'm sure you're looking forward to? though if you already read the previous version of the beginning of this story, it's basically cut/paste, so you've already read it, unfortunately lol thank you very much to em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @ javert, on twitter @ natsinator, my other writing is linked at gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and you can join my discord if you so desire https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 15 Sep 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-006/i was looking forward to writing the conversation with kircheis but now that it's done i'm not entirely sure i like it. i feel like it could have been longer. well maybe i'll fix it someday [narrator: they did not fix it someday] i love it when people put on gloves and take off gloves a scene of moderate horniness ok well i've written two chapters in the row of this story b/c i wanted to get to this point (END OF ACT ONE essentially) so i will probably be writing two every hateful instrument chapters before i come back here. sowwy. all the dominoes have at least gotten lined up lol. i feel like it's very easy to see how all the ensuing nonsense will play out but maybe i am wrong about that because i have all the information and you do not i'm @ javert on tumblr @ natsinator on twitter, and i'd encourage you to read the rest of my writing here on ao3, esp my other current project EVERY HATEFUL INSTRUMENT or my ongoing massive LOGH roleswap AU series (no canon knowledge required) A WHEEL INSIDE A WHEEL. you can also join my discord if you like https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuWed, 08 Sep 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-005/the chapter title is a direct quote from dr strangelove "War is too important to be left to politicians. They have neither the time, the training, nor the inclination for strategic thought." perhaps fitting, considering Westerland 😬 (that quote in itself is a mangling of i believe a de gaulle quote-- politics is too important to be left to the politicians. reinhard would probably agree on that score as well lmao. mr coup man.) anyway um lots of little funny moments in this one. kircheis had to be left in the car in order to set up the next chapter haha. mild cliffhanger i suppose :p the stakes in this fic are so incredibly low that someone getting wine dumped over them is like. spicy. hope you enjoy silly banter and other such things. you know the drill: i'm javert on tumblr and natsinator on twitter. the rest of my writing has links at gayspaceopera.carrd.co . I'd especially encourage you to check out my original fiction that i'm writing concurrently with this one, Every Hateful Instrument. it's good, i prommy (different way of saying promise)Thu, 02 Sep 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-002/a slightly different fight scene than the one that existed in the original version of this chapter, but i don't think it matters much haha for some reason when i'm writing itsoh i'm very prone to rambling, in a way i'm less likely to do in WIAW or any of my other works. probably just because working on the first project i ever touched for real (even if EHI is a spinoff novel), i regress back into some of my old habits :p i don't know if my writing style itself is meaningfully different between my various projects. hard to tell. (granted, it's hard for me to feel like i have a writing style at all, but i've been told that I do haha) i think that maybe i could have done more with this chapter but maybe someday i'll go back and revise it haha. i mostly just wanted to get it out. anyway bby's first murder <3 and grace's lol. she's a bloodthirsty giant 13 y/o (well, the years in itsoh-verse have 400 days in them, so she's in our calendar 14 and a bit. but ykwim) i'd love to hear what you think of this story so far! thank you very very much to em for the beta read. you can find me on tumblr @ javert , on twitter @ natsinator , and the rest of my writing is linked at gayspaceopera.carrd.coMon, 30 Aug 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-004/bit of a shorter chapter, but i mostly needed to establish thomas getting back to work before the actual juicy drama starts going down. bates is somewhat unpleasant. i'm legit very excited to write the next couple chapters of this story though lol. it's going to be a party at which many people have a moderately terrible time, mediated by a few interesting moments. also it will be much more of the intersection between the two casts haha maybe this chapter could have been longer and touched on a few more things but it's maybe better to not try too hard to jam everything possible in all at once. if i decide i need more here i can always go back and edit it lol. this is the nature of just posting raw first drafts on the internet. hopefully they're still good and fun anyway um you can find me on tumblr as @ javert, twitter @ natsinator, my landing pad for most of my writing is my currently somewhat out of date website gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and you are also free to join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . please do check out my other writing, including my long logh fic, a wheel inside a wheel (bit.ly/wheelinsideawheel) and the original fiction i'm currently writing, Every Hateful Instrument (here on ao3)Mon, 23 Aug 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/every-hateful-instrument/ch-001/welcome to my twisted mind etc etc etc if you haven't read the rest of ItSoH and are planning on reading this story, maybe /don't/ read ItSoH, so you'll get the strange experience of chronological order :p if you have already read ItSoH <33 ilu it's so fun to be back in itsohverse and doing my usual worldbuilding tricks :p god i'm realizing anybody reading this first really /doesn't/ know anything. this will be so fun we're Getting Into Knives what is the price of Hail's brain in a jar? :^) thank you so much to em for the beta read! hey go check out my other nonsense: gayspaceopera.carrd.co . i'm on twitter @ natsinator and on tumblr @ javert . you can also join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu see you soon!Fri, 20 Aug 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-017/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-017/well... here we are. over a year later, we've finally made it to the end of this part of noodle's wild ride haha. i guess let me talk about the chapter first before i get into anything else lol. i hope you're all glad to see muller again. he and dusty are now going to have to compete with each other for reinhard's affections, what of them there are lol. sorry yang you won't get to have muller hang out with you on that side of the story this story begins and ends in the same place, with weird conversations w/ dominique in the phezzan starzone lol. reinhard is absolutely abusing his authority as trunicht's little messenger boy btw. this will cause problems later. the title is from the robert burns poem about a mouse But, Mousie, thou art no thy-lane, In proving foresight may be vain; The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men Gang aft agley, An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain, For promis'd joy! Still thou art blest, compar'd wi' me The present only toucheth thee: But, Och! I backward cast my e'e. On prospects drear! An' forward, tho' I canna see, I guess an' fear! which i figured was as good of a title as any for a cliffhanger at the end of this story haha. i'm going to be taking a moderately sized break from this series. I'm aiming to be back with the next yang section, *serpent's mouth, serpent's teeth *sometime around december, but I won't make any promises or guarantees other than that i will indeed be back. in the meantime, i'm going to be working on two things: my very silly logh/downton abbey crossover fic, *Last Gasp at Calama*, which is probably the closest i will ever get to writing a 'reinhard and kircheis hang out and nothing bad happens at all' story. so enjoy that while it lasts. i'll also be working on some of my original fiction, a novel called *Every Hateful Instrument*, the plot of which i will describe below** > **Hail-and-Farewell Vinright is a pirate, and happy to be one, plying the starways on his family's ship, ferrying drugs and weapons and any other illicit cargo they can across the galaxy. When he discovers that the headaches he's been plagued with for the past several years are not a sign that he has a brain tumor, and are instead the rare god-given gift of the power, psychic abilities that fewer than one in a million people have, Hail sees the opportunity to help his family's profit margin. Only people with the power can perform the highly dangerous task of building stardrives, the core of every ship that allows them to jump between stars, and the market for stardrives is tightly locked down by the Imperial government. Pirates would pay unknowable sums for a steady supply, so Hail offers to begin constructing them for his family to sell.** > > **Aymon Sandreas is the least likely candidate to take the Imperial throne upon the death or retirement of his master, First Carron Herrault. When Aymon takes one too many steps out of line, his master sends him on a wild goose chase to find the pirates who are flooding the galaxy with stardrives, and therefore destabilizing the political dominance of the Imperial government and the spacefaring Guild-- the only people legally allowed to operate interstellar ships-- Aymon thinks he's in for the most boring several months of his life, until his master summons him back home. Instead, Aymon's interest is piqued when, after he destroys the pirate ship, his stardrive maker somehow survives, proving himself a capable and clever adversary.** > > **When Hail and Aymon finally come face to face, rather than killing him, Aymon offers Hail an opportunity: work for me, in exchange for your life. But Hail wants nothing more than revenge for the deaths of his family, and he's willing to play the long game to get it...** anyway I'll be posting EHI both here on ao3 and on royalroad. i really hope you give it a chance <3 if you like this fic, i can basically guarantee you'll enjoy it thank you all so much for sticking with me through all the ups and downs of this story and my writing journey. i really appreciate hearing from you, & i hope i have been able to provide some joy or entertainment, despite how sporadic my updates have been on this story lol. i love you all thanks especially much to em for beta reading, idk where i'd be without you. i'm probably going to have a little celebration for finishing on my discord in the next couple days, come join me https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . that's also where u can get notifications about what i'm working on. you can find me on tumblr @ javert and twitter @ natsinator . index of nonsense @ gayspaceopera.carrd.coWed, 18 Aug 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-016/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-016/some parts of this chapter i'm very happy with, others i'm eh about but hopefully it's an exciting one for you to read anyway haha. maybe at some point i'll go back and change the things i don't like but for now, it's here and that's what really matters. rip to phezzan's space elevator. the alliance plan to invade is already not going so hot, since they were planning to like, use that. god i'm so close to being done with this book. happy 1st birthday to LOftT btw-- I posted the first chapter a year ago today >.> an image that i wanted to include, but couldn't figure out how, would be like-- you know how if you hold a slinky up so that the bottom of it is stretched out and dangling, and then you let go of the top, the bottom doesn't start falling until all the tension has gone out of it? i would have love to orchestrate the space elevator doing that somehow but i couldn't work it in. anyway, just picture it in your heads for me anyway and i'll be satisfied title, vaguely https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rnKbImRPhTE thank you very much to em for the beta read! you can find me on twitter @ natsinator and on tumblr @ javert . my carrd that needs updating is gayspaceopera.carrd.co , and you can also join my discord if you like :) https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuTue, 10 Aug 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-003/i'm not entirely sure how well i'm doing with the various characterizations of DA people, but I hope I'm doing a satisfactory job. i'm having a lot of fun writing this very silly fic, anyway. so i hope you are also enjoying reading it for all my logh readers-- there were a lot of new faces in this chapter lol. do you think i should put like a "who are all these people" section up in the author's notes before the chapter? hopefully it's all clear without that but if you need clarification please do let me know. (DA readers, if you are confused also please let me know) hiiiiii maggie ilu tom takes sybil to the same place that martin takes kircheis, hilde, and maggie to in [ch14 of *Servants of the Pharaoh*](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23878408/chapters/60062248). welcome to the noodle cinematic universe baybeeee. thomas will return next chapter, i promise. (arrival of the next chapter of this fic will be after my next chapter(s) of *Lighting Out for the Territories* so don't expect it very soon) thank you very much for reading :3 i'd love to hear what you think! you can find me on tumblr @javert , on twitter @natsinator , and you can read the rest of my fic here on ao3 (a wheel inside a wheel (series), like this fic, is readable with 0 knowledge of legend of the galactic heroes!) or find links to my original fiction at gayspaceopera.carrd.co <3Sat, 31 Jul 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-015/could i explain why this chapter took so long? no. but here it is so I hope you enjoy it haha annerose and julian are great together, but they both have that "acts of service" love language going on and it can make things a little difficult. i shall refrain from discussing julian and his protective nature and who he shares some thematic similarities with any further :) welcome back to the story jessica edwards. long time no see. hurry up and get radicalized. reinhard is being extremely cagey with what he is actually telling annerose. but the schemes she is worried about are not the ones that reinhard is actively keeping secret lol. she's worried about like trunicht trying to stab the earth church in the back, or bad leadership decisions at the front, etc, and reinhard is just like. well. as long as she doesn't find out that I engineered this disaster to happen to our home country that's all fine. annerose can have a work boyfriend who she has an intense camaraderie and great sex with, and a wife who lives in her house who she loves but will not admit that she loves. that's fine lol. very healthy for all involved. "a picture of domestic bliss" is a bit tongue in cheek. it's what i used to tag all my whiny posts about various terrible living situations with when i vented on tumblr dot hell. annerose's living situation is fine, but she's stressed about the future. and who wouldn't be. we are in the endgame territory of this particular section of story. thank you very much to em for the beta read! you know where to find me: the rest of my writing at gayspaceopera.carrd.co , javert on tumblr, natsinator on twitter. my discord is here https://discord.gg/DQSFdEZMQNTue, 27 Jul 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-002/i think the conversation with magdalena might be a tad long in the tooth, but i love magdalena, and i think that for the poor lost downton abbey readers, it's probably best to give more rather than less context, even if you are somewhat dropped in the middle of it. i hope that it's comprehensible to you what the situation is, even if you're not familiar with this cast haha. please let me know if you're confused! i'm very happy to add more context to these chapters if needed. for the logh reader who has been following along: magdalena's gambit involves bringing up the events of ["towards the tail-end of an age that's almost finished"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27208510). this is because i love for my stupid little fanfictions to be continuous with one another. also because i think that one is particularly good. you should go read it if you haven't lol look... in my brain logh and DA have some similar themes. they're both in some ways about dealing with living in the crumbling end of an empire. and they both have ensemble casts. and gay people who make absolutely godawful life choices. that's plenty. they're a perfect match. yes i have appended 'von' to matthew's name. they're in stupid fake space germany. it's unfortunately required. and lord grantham is a count now instead of an earl b/c i don't think logh has earls, and they're [handwave] basically equivalent. matthew also only made it to lieutenant here b/c according to the logh wiki a ground captain is equivalent to a fleet lieutenant. feel free to complain about this. thank you very much for reading! hey if you are a DA person-- you should read Wheel Inside a Wheel-- no logh canon knowledge is required to pick that one up! bit.ly/wheelinsideawheel . and everybody can go read the rest of my nonsense at gayspaceopera.carrd.co haha. you can find me on tumblr @ javert and on twitter @ natsinator , or join my discord if you like https://discord.gg/nvBWQ5vDxyMon, 05 Jul 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/last-gasp-at-calama/ch-001/If you're here because you read my other LOGH fic... thank you for trusting me... I love you. If you're here because you like DA-- hello! It's nice to meet you! Thank you for coming on this journey with me! Hopefully, whichever side of this story you're here for, you will find this interesting. I will do my best to do everybody justice haha. This is very much a back burner project, so don't expect regular updates. I'm really only allowing myself to work on this when I have accomplished what I need to do in *Lighting Out for the Territories*. But hey, something to read is better than nothing to read haha. The title of this fic is from [a mountain goats song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SJ4u9b4jxc)Wed, 30 Jun 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-014/better late than never on this chapter i suppose >.> reinhard awkwardly inserting himself into fredrica and fork's date was a questionable choice but whatever lol this is less "reinhard did 9/11" and more "reinhard did the 2008 financial crisis". this is a less outright fatal version of westerland i guess, but still pretty fucked. i hope all of this makes enough sense btw. the intricacies of some of this political/economic stuff is what i feel least confident about in a lot of ways. keeping secrets from annerose b/c you don't want her to have to see her be morally tarnished for your shitty life choices is. well that's probably not the ideal way to live life but you do you reinhard. it's good to have a chat with his mom though. even if she is in a cult. thank you very much to Em for the beta read! you can find me on twitter @ natsinator, on tumblr @ javert. and there's a whole bunch of other stuff at gayspaceopera.carrd.co . join my discord server https://discord.gg/nvBWQ5vDxy if you like :)Tue, 29 Jun 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/a-city-with-no-children-in-it/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/a-city-with-no-children-in-it/the way kurtwell is dealt with in episode 10 simply does not sit right with me so. I had to fix it. i am not going to write any further pope fic >.> the title is from an [arcade fire song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkgcAmT5Io0) technically, this is a self insert fic in some sense :p lenny would actually hate my science fiction, probably you can find me @ javert on tumblr @ natsinator on twitter and my other fiction can be read at gayspaceopera.carrd.co Mon, 28 Jun 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-013/as promised, a monday chapter. This was \*not\* the chapter that i was intending to write, per my outline, which was supposed to include some julian drama, as well as reinhard awkwardly third-wheeling fredrica and fork on a date + starting his new job with trunicht. but the thing about outlines is that they have to be flexible, sometimes. anyway hello dusty. long time no see. i'm not sure that reinhard is chill enough to have successful gay drama but that is not going to stop dusty from giving it the old college try. hopefully this is fun and entertaining to you all and not "a jfc why author" moment the timeskip exists b/c i needed reinhard to have slightly more on paper power. it's not ideal-- i didn't really want the kaiser to live this long for pacing reasons on the other side of the story, but whatever... it's fine. burn that bridge when we get to it i guess i hope this chapter doesn't feel repetitive with the last one, even though we've now spent two chapters doing "annerose's house drama". i promise we'll be back to real politics next chapter. reinhard's ship was just named the first city name that popped into my head lol. [been a long time gone constantinople etc](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xo0X77OBJUg) . dusty also sings [leave her, johnny](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBNt3ALLcLQ) have you voted in my [poll yet? please do](https://forms.gle/dviLhspnhXK9zwrK8) un-beta'd b/c i didn't actually finish this chapter until it was too late for that. sorry em ;0; reminds me of the ol' itsoh days when i would finish the last sentence of a chapter at like 2am and immediately post the whole thing and fall directly asleep. the best of times, the worst of times, etc. anyway you know the drill: i'm javert on tumblr and natsinator on twitter. various other links at gayspaceopera.carrd.co . see you next monday!Tue, 15 Jun 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-012/this is a bit of a transition chapter. we're basically going to timeskip a year until kaiser death lol. let's pretend like he lives longer than he should in this universe because annerose wasn't around to kill him ;) anyway lol reinhard can't stay a lieutenant commander forever, so i'm going to ship him off to just become a slightly more important person annerose is worried about the feelings of things getting ready to spiral out of control. she's right to feel that way. we have finished setting up most of the dominoes, and they are about to start tipping over. ingrid is a very relatable character i think lol. anyway the title is from [a lorde song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B25PAgrFQ-k) you're the only friend i need / sharing beds like little kids / we'll laugh until our ribs get tired / but that will never be enough circling back to the theme of who is able to be happy and who is able to be content. annerose is happy, ingrid is trying to be content, and reinhard is neither. it's messy and it's not going to get any less so. i'm going to be attempting to stick to a solid 1ch/week posting situation, with updates on mondays. we'll see how long this lasts. hopefully i can do it-- I'm really trying to pull myself up by my bootstraps etc etc etc please vote in my poll (see beginning author's note) if you haven't yet! thank you very much to em for the beta read! you can find me on twitter @ natsinator, on tumblr @ javert, and my discord is here https://discord.gg/TcAGkPZMon, 07 Jun 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-011/idk what to say other than that i am very sorry for taking an unplanned 5 month hiatus from this story-- pls forgive me. though i have been writing a decent amount of logh fic in the interim, so if you haven't checked out the following things i suggest you do :) - [point/counterpoint](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29044893) - (canon compliant) a yang/schenkopp fic - [a white and soundless place](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29234772) - (canon compliant) reinhard and hilde have their honeymoon - [untroubled by comings and goings of men](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29784075) - (canon compliant) magdalena/annerose tender hours - [keep the home fires (burning)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29811993) - a wheel inside a wheel story! takes place immediately after servants of the pharaoh - [talking without speaking](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27020431) - that 'midnight sun' edition of speaking in tongues is finished now - [the children of this world marry, and are given in marriage](https://archiveofourown.org/works/30212391) - an e26 canon divergence fic about The Consequences of Kircheis anyway, about this chapter: yay good job yang on finally publishing that book you were working on for like a million years in SotP. muller your obvious crush on reinhard is showing. don't worry, we haven't seen the last of him even though he's temporarily dipped out of the story. reinhard being forced to throw his hat in with trunicht is a mirror to yang being forced to join up with braunschweig over on the other side of the story. the question of "who did actually murder castrop and how" is moderately entertaining. i'll let you sit on that mystery for a while. look i love to have a "everybody is pointing fingers about murder for political reasons" plot and I WILL keep doing it. it's theme? sorry again for my unplanned break. i've been very depressed lol. but i'm trying and i do write every day, and i'm not going to work on anything else until this part of the story is done done, so hopefully we should be back to steady-ish updates. thank you very much to em for the beta read! the rest of my stuff at my desperately-needs-to-be-updated portfolio @ gayspaceopera.carrd.co , you can find me on twitter @natsinator and on tumblr @javert. you can also join my discord! it's a chill little place https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuSat, 22 May 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-007/chapter title - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMj6tCQ1MNc I doubt i will ever actually write the sequel to this story, but i wanted to close on some taste of what the future could feel like. you are welcome to write the sequel (or prequel) to this story of course-- i'd be interested to see what other people think a post-reinhard world looks like poor alternate universe felix. being raised by reuenthal and elfriede in weird shifts is probably significantly worse for your emotional well-being than being raised by the mittermeyers lol. i don't actually think that reuenthal would be the world's worst father fwiw, but I definitely don't think he'd be like an emotionally healthy one. the bar of 'don't abuse your kid' is pretty low though and i think he would at least manage to clear that. anyway! thank you so much for reading <3 let me know what you think of this story thank you very very much to em for the beta read. you can find me on tumblr @javert and twitter @natsinator. my other writing is at gayspaceopera.carrd.co and you can also join my discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nuFri, 07 May 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-006/i had a choice of my siblings to name the annerose & kircheis baby after: i could have said that they would name her after reinhard & annerose's mother (caribelle)-- one of my siblings' middle names is Belle and the other is Rose. but annerose seemed like the more reasonable choice since in canon we got alexander siegfried-- annerose should get a turn :) anyway i thought that was just funny. anyway. we have finally come to the end of this little story (aside from the epilogue lol). i'm not sure if i'm in love with this last chapter but i hope it is satisfying for you, on some level, even if it is at this point really just sad things happening. i'm never writing 'reinhard dies of The Sickness' plot again btw i just don't think it's interesting enough to merit doing it twice lol. i think there are other interesting 'kircheis lives' plots that could be written, but i shouldn't write them now. i have to get back to work on LOftT! i hope you have enjoyed this story, for whatever level of enjoyment there is lol thank you very much to em for the beta read!Fri, 07 May 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-005/everybody is continuing to have a bad time, as usual. except for yang wen-li, who just narrowly got out of having iserlohn fortress being put under siege, at least for now yeah reuenthal and reinhard hanging out together constantly and feeding on each other's um, problems syndrome, is bad for both of them but such is life. kircheis's presence stabilized the reinhard & reuenthal relationship (in terms of amount of treason reuenthal contemplates on any given day) but at what cost, honestly. anyway both of their boyfriends are straight married now which is certainly not helping any of this. lol. i love eavesdropping the reinhard/kircheis convo in the last scene could probably stand to be more tense but i'm not sure what else i can do to fiddle with it. maybe i'll rewrite it at some point? chapter title https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQHq7aU0X78 *I can remember when we were in high school Our dreams were like fugitive warlords Plotting triumphant returns to the city Keeping Tec-9's tucked under the floorboards Now we are practical men of the world We tether our dreams to the turf And cruise down these alleys for honey to feed them Jellyfish riding the surf Shoving our heads straight into the guts of the stove Home again Garden Grove* one chapter + the epilogue left and i'll be free of this fic! and i can go back to working on LOftT haha thank you very much to em for the beta read! i'm on tumblr @javert , twitter @natsinator , and you can join my discord server here https://discord.gg/wnMHeXzcK7Sun, 02 May 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-004/not me ignoring phezzan canon weather <3 it's tropical in my heart HBSHBL e8 lives rent free in my head. it's probably the single best gaiden episode. or at least it's the one that activates the most of my brain worms. hey kircheis, you know it's not normal to only see your parents once in 8 years, and when you do see them to show up nearly by surprise, need to get drunk beforehand, and have a very strained conversation where your parents are absolutely definitely trying to pretend like you're not gay. the weird and complicated relationships that everyone on the empire side seems to have with their families... hmmmmmmmmmmmm anyway i had to address the fact that his parents exist and clearly would have thoughts about him getting married. i didn't want to spend too long on it though-- i suppose it's an open question on if their relationship actually gets "repaired" to a meaningful degree i also thought it was necessary to have a reinhard, annerose, and kircheis are alone in a room together scene. they all have a lot of complicated emotions and all of them are bad at expressing them. the dancing was the image that popped into my head as like the emotional core of the scene and i constructed the rest around it similarly, the walking down the aisle was the key image that held the wedding scene together for me. it's kinda designed to hurt you i guess. sorry for that. i think that doing the wedding night scene from annerose's perspective would have been somewhat rough. so we get kircheis and his trip down memory lane instead. title is from the mountain goats song 'harlem roulette'. the loneliest people in the whole wide world are the ones you're never going to see again! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_seYw-92jn0 thank you very much for reading-- let me know what you think! i love to hear from you <3 thank you very much to em for the beta read! i'm on twitter @natsinator and tumblr @javert . you can join my discord here https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu or check out my other work at gayspaceopera.carrd.coMon, 26 Apr 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-003/time for some more extremely fraught heterosexuality. what /has/ been going on magdalena 'not appearing in this story' von westpfale? nothing good probably again, if you haven't read [untouchable and golden](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27329341) you really probably should. the brief conversation about architecture follows directly from a tangent that happens in [lighting out for the territories, ch 7](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25814629/chapters/68443868) . kircheis getting a little too sympathetic towards neue land? maybe. maybe the fact that I think Phezzan is a strange place colors a lot of the way I write it lol title of this chapter is from [black pear tree](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QymCgh5x-H0) . I saw the future in a dream last night somebody's gonna get hurt somebody's gonna get hurt hope it's not me but i suspect it's gonna have to be i guess i'm curious to know how painful you think this all is lmao. i don't have a good sense of these things. anyway next chapter has several fraught things in it so. we'll see. let me know how you feel about this story anyway, I love to hear from you all haha. thank you very much to Em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @javert and twitter @natsinator, and you can join my discord https://discord.gg/wnMHeXzcK7 to chat if you'd like :]Thu, 08 Apr 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-002/it never seemed realistic to me that the FPA could be conquered anywhere close to bloodlessly, even if the government surrendered. anyway, i also think that reinhard would be way less willing to do the whole "I'm the bait in the yang wenli trap" deal if he was not borderline suicidal due to chronic lack of kircheis, so i feel like the whole capturing of the FPA would have gone down...very differently. anyway the end result of this is that kircheis has some unspecified amount of blood very firmly on his hands. whoops. hello to all my oberstein stans. honestly i know it's hard for people to not sort themselves into the 'oberstein did nothing wrong' or 'oberstein is the literal devil' camps but i am trying, as per usual, to have a nuanced oberstein take. unfortunately the problem with me is that the instant i start spending time in a character's head and trying to pick apart their motivations, the more sympathetic towards them i become lol kircheis is such a black box. an enigma. you put that man's empty eyes next to anything and it means something and nothing at the same time. someone the other day (who knows who or how long ago it was lol) was talking about how kircheis is honestly probably pretty fucking scary to anybody who does not know him and see him go ^\_^ on a regular basis. he's so tall and strong and dead eyed and devoted to a ruthless conqueror. anyway i hope you all feel that i have done right by him in this chapter lol i cannot stress enough that if you want more "good man who commits unspeakable acts of violence because of love for his universe ruling husband " content, you should read my /other/ gay space opera, in the shadow of heaven [rewrite hosted on ao3]. aymon and halen (the pair in question) are a somewhat more fucked up variant of reinhard and kircheis. minus the chronic illness plot because honestly the chronic illness reinhard plot bores me. i don't want to write sick fic tbh, and i'm hoping that by getting it out now I will not be obligated to cover it in WIaW because (yawn). logh has a really fucking weird commentary on like disability and illness, and maybe someday i will want to address that, but i would want to come up with an actual plot built around addressing it. that's not this, and it's not wiaw either. so [shrug emoji] anyway. let me know what you think! thank you to em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @javert and twitter @natsinator. my other writing is @ gayspaceopera.carrd.coFri, 26 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/the-children-of-this-world-marry-and-are-given-in-marriage/ch-001/so. obviously. things are somewhat different in this universe! with divergence at e26, annerose never had the opportunity to see what "giving absolutely everything to reinhard" could do to the people closest to him, and so she's been spending the past several years bending over backwards to help him, as she always had before. this is that, taken to its logical conclusion. the elfriede thing obviously played out quite differently. the conquering of the FPA also happened, uh, differently. Yang is alive and chilling in Iserlohn but... shall we say some different things happened to get him there. i don't think he's going to show up though. I suppose it doesn't really matter-- I'm not going to spend a billion years writing this au because frankly 'e26 canon divergence' and its ripple effects are interesting from an emotional standpoint, but probably not from a like. plot standpoint. so i'm fastforwarding to the miserable end of the slow march of history haha. since this diverges at e26, you can assume that the events of 'towards the tail end of the age that's almost finished' and 'untouchable and golden' both happened. i directly reference something that happens in 'untouchable and golden', so you should probably go read that if you haven't. this shouldn't be too long of a story. maybe 3-4 chapters. let me know if this is like, completely incomprehensible. do i provide enough information in the chapter for you to glean the state of the universe? sorry for the bible passage. this isn't a fic about religion lol. it's a fic about the exquisite homoeroticism of your "best friend" marrying your sister. obviously. thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! you can find me on twitter @natsinator and on tumblr @javert . the rest of my nonsense is @ gayspaceopera.carrd.coTue, 23 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-014/i don't think i'm completely satisfied with the way this ends so tbh i might just cut the last scene. but i wanted to make this not quite a copy/paste from SiT so... i suppose this is the danger of "rewrite the story from the other perspective" lol. you can be the judge on if i succeeded or failed in making this engaging. at least it's done lol [never quite free](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEvI5Gl0r4Y) is a song by the mountain goats, which i almost sang at my high school senior choir recital... thing... but i settled on a different song (us by regina spektor, for the curious). never quite free is just... well i simply have many thoughts about it! anyway i hope you have enjoyed this silly story, even if it is just the same story twice lol. it was still fun to write so that's something, i guess socials: @natsinator on twitter @javert on tumblr, gayspaceopera.carrd.co for the rest of my stuff. you know the drill.Thu, 18 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-013/Although I knew what I wanted to say in that last conversation, it was still a little difficult to write lol. ok one more chapter and then this book can stop haunting me haha let me know what you think <3 you know the drill. socials: twitter @natsinator , tumblr @javert , the rest of my stuff @ gayspaceopera.carrd.co . join my discord to chat https://discord.gg/tE4xVyGuu6Tue, 16 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-012/I know I say this basically every chapter but. I do not know if you will like this chapter lol. Sometimes I feel like I say the same things over and over. You have to tell me if I'm being boring Title is from "A Left-Handed Commencement Address" by Ursula K. Le Guin you can find me @javert on tumblr or @natsinator on twitter. you could even join my discord server, if you like @ https://discord.gg/nvBWQ5vDxy it's chill. the rest of my writing is @ gayspaceopera.carrd.coThu, 11 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-011/Been a while since I posted one of these lol. i figured that in order to make TWS worth actually reading, instead of just reading SiT again, I should include some new material. I think I need to go back and change like one or two paragraphs of continuity in SiT about Eisenach controlling the Phezzan defense, but that's nbd this is what happens when you slightly retcon your previous work in order to make an untold half of the narrative more interesting I hope it's interesting, anyway haha. I feel like this story is a totally different mindset than like everything else that I've been working on, or at least this chapter is. so idk how well i did with it. >.> anyway, I want to get this story finished so it can stop haunting me. title is an obvious reference to ender's game, because [sigh] ender's game is obviously a huge influence, and i couldn't think of any more interesting title. obligatory 'the author is a huge dick' caveat on that one. unbeta'd because this story is a gift for one of my beta readers and I'm not going to make em do work for it, and the other one is asleep rn and I just feel like Posting lol. so that's where we're at with the writing life today. as usual, I'm on twitter as @natsinator and on tumblr as @javert. all my links are @ gayspaceopera.carrd.coMon, 08 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/keep-the-home-fires-burning/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/keep-the-home-fires-burning/ch-001/chapter title is from ["The Dethbridge in Lethbridge" by the Rural Alberta Advantage](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SAlWPZ2wTNY). I saw them live once :) yang has complicated feelings about family lol thank you to em and lydia for the beta read!Wed, 03 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/keep-the-home-fires-burning/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/keep-the-home-fires-burning/ch-002/chapter title is from ["The Family and the Fishing Net" by Peter Gabriel](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Bg_dwfRnL8) i forget what I was going to say in my author's notes? i feel like i had a mbillion things to say, but I've forgotten them all. perhaps this just means the work must stand on its own for once lol. thank you to em and lydia for the beta read!Wed, 03 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/keep-the-home-fires-burning/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/keep-the-home-fires-burning/ch-003/chapter title from ["Linda Blair Was Born Innocent" by the Mountain Goats](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyrQCY4rzDg) . empty hearts on fire... hungry for love! ready to drown! i hope none of you hate me after this chapter haha. I feel like i may be losing your trust some 560k words into this nonsense. I hope not though >.> much of this chapter is the spiritual twin to "Towards the Tail-End of the Age That's Almost Finished", though the dinner party scene and much after it was written long before that story haha. god there's actually... a lot I want to say. but maybe I should practice the art of Shutting The Fuck Up. but if you want to get me to wax on at length about literally anything in here. just let me know. I would love to hear about what you thought of this little story! I certainly hope you enjoyed it :3c thank you so much for reading, and thank you to em and lydia for the beta read! you can find all my other nonsense @ gayspaceopera.carrd.coWed, 03 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/untroubled-by-comings-and-goings-of-men/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/untroubled-by-comings-and-goings-of-men/say there's this character who goes into self imposed exile... and say there's a me who has been dead alone in my 600 sqft apartment without going anywhere or seeing anyone for basically a year... anyway I'm a little :( and living vicariously thru gay fanfiction. as one does. if there's anyone else in this boat i hope this is... idk. ykwim. the thing about writing annerose and magdalena is that i am working with extremely little canon material haha. so i'm always trying to be reasonable with the extrapolations that i make, and flesh them both out into real feeling characters with motivations and internalities that make sense. ymmv on if i succeed at that quest or not haha mention is made of things that happen in 'towards the tail-end of an age that's almost finished' and (kinda) 'untouchable and golden' so you might want to check those out if you haven't read them yet. for continuity's sake :p there are plenty of titles i could have chosen for this fic-- god knows there are plenty of mountain goats songs about loneliness and exile (voluntary or otherwise) ('o solitude friend of the friendless' etc etc etc) but I decided to mix it up and go with some good old stan rogers [Free in the harbour; the blackfish are sporting again Free in the harbour; untroubled by comings and goings of men Who once did persue them as oil from the sea, Hauling away! Hauling away! Now they're Calgary roughnecks from Hermitage Bay, Where the whales make free in the harbour.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5EusP_tEK8) anyway, i hope you enjoyed this. please let me know what you think! thank you very much to em and lydia for the beta read! all my links are @ gayspaceopera.carrd.co and you can find me on twitter as @natsinator and on tumblr as @javert Mon, 01 Mar 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/a-white-and-soundless-place/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/a-white-and-soundless-place/i have this thesis about LOGH, that it's not actually "about" arguments for autocracy or democracy, but it's rather a story illustrating how people's lives and relationships are destroyed when the only way that they can relate to each other is through hierarchies of power. democracy vs autocracy is just another way of illustrating that point. when no one is your equal, you can't trust them, not really. and this makes you very, very alone. bucock's last speech is the show straight up the show turning to the audience and stating this theme directly. it's a rich vein for exploration in fanfiction, anyway. my last fic, 'point/counterpoint', has the yang/schenkopp struggle with this same theme. i suppose LOGH is about many things. i want to thank it for giving me this canon pairing where these already extremely gay ass characters look even more gay as soon as they hook up and start having to perform heterosexuality. getting straight married but not kissing at the wedding. out of respect for our troops. also married couples should really be able to call each other by their first names lmao. reinhard and hilde, i love you but this is so messy. this story follows pretty directly from 'a house made out of beds', so emil shows up for us to get a little bit of closure on the emotional threads opened up there haha the title is from the mountain goats song "love, love, love", which is also where the title of this whole series of one shots comes from. *love, love is going to lead you by the hand into a white and soundless place now we see things, as in a mirror dimly then we shall see each other, face to face* i'm annoyed by the canon geography of phezzan. in WIAW i ignore canon and write things that actually make sense. space elevators go at the equator -> they are near the space elevator -> it shouldn't be snowing. but this is a CANON COMPLIANT fic :p thanks for reading <3 let me know what you think tysm to em for the beta read! my links are all at gayspaceopera.carrd.co Sat, 06 Feb 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/point-counterpoint/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/point-counterpoint/does this "belong" in As In a Mirror, Dimly? they do talk about reinhard but he is not the focus lol the painting schenkopp mentions is [this one](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/20/Proclaiming_claudius_emperor.png) . is this just an excuse to talk about art i like? yes. is it in character for schenkopp to care about art at all? probably not but it's my fanfiction and I get to choose the art history lesson mouthpiece du jour everyone just is desperate for yang wenli to love them and honestly? who can blame them for that i really like yang/schenkopp but i am not sure of like the mechanics of it in terms of when they would get together. this whole thing smacks of tragedy i holler as i overturn the hyperion and turn the battle of vermilion into the battle of Shit title is from the streetlight manifesto song of the same name. go listen to some ska i feel like i had more to say but i have now forgotten. my curse thank you to em for the beta read! check out my links at gayspaceopera.carrd.co Thu, 28 Jan 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-010/this is a rework of several scenes from several different chapters in the original version, but honestly none of them are anything like this version so it's not even worth trying to pick apart what the originals were lol i hope the beginning few shorter scenes work well to show just snippets of interesting things in the timeskip. I didn't want to linger on any of that b/c it's not super vital, but I thought it would be good to show bits of things happening idk. who's ready for yan and sid's epic adventure? they sure as fuck aren't lol. anyway, we've had a lot of kino time b/c i think it's important, especially since the next arc is going to be yan and sid hanging out. it's tough to balance the both of them, which i feel like has meant sid has been slightly neglected thus far? sorta the opposite of the orignal draft where he got a TON of screentime. most of that got cut b/c it was dragging the pace to an absolute crawl lol anyway, hope you enjoyed the "three people who really should not go clubbing go clubbing" chapter lmao chapter title is from "Believe Me Natalie" by the killers. the equivalent next chapter in the original is ch 23. minor continuity changes abound. https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/19912/in-the-shadow-of-heaven/chapter/294438/chapter-twenty-three-a-song-in-the-darkMon, 18 Jan 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-009/Bit of a shorter chapter, but Aymon POV is worth having I think. uhhhhhhhh idk what to say about this one. Equivalent is still [ch21](https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/19912/in-the-shadow-of-heaven/chapter/292408/chapter-twenty-one-just-two-slow-dancers) in the original draft. though obviously everything here is pretty different lol maybe I should have had yan outright question what aymon and halen are to each other. let me know if you think that's worth including. i didn't want their conversation to drag on too long as always, I would love to hear your feedback, whether you've read the original draft or not. i feel like... some of the more tender moments from the og draft got cut for time-- i don't know if i'm making all this feel too rushed. it's a big concern of mine lol. so let me know um some of this maybe borders on foreshadowing lmao. or at least. "this looks bad, in hindsight" lol. but I don't want to talk about that too much for anyone who has not read the og act 2Mon, 11 Jan 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-008/Yuuni walking into this mess: what in the god damn hell is going on here <3 kino and her ridiculous nonsense hello iri \*w\* if yan was actually engaging with the things she's sorta kinda learned about halen, she might start to feel guilty that she didn't just let vaneik kill that dude. or at least have a different host of complicated emotions. but. hm. she is not going to do that. the "Oh. wait. me not allowing someone to be killed means that they'll be tortured to death instead" thought has not yet really sunk into her brain. this will never come up again in the future. yan and sylva maybe need to sit down and talk about their feelings, but yan is, hm, well. "if I don't think about it, it ceases to be a problem :) " and sylva unfortunately is not very emotionally mature i can't decide if it's more or less interesting to be writing this second draft. i think it's definitely a snappier story (though i think at this point we're missing out on a lot of sid/halen/aymon characterization that happened in REV P01... hmmm...) and I also think that having the specific beats of act 2 laid out for me very cleanly allows for me to make connections that weren't there before, and do it in a more thoughtful way. but otoh, there's something very fun and funky about just like, first draft. idk. this is a new process for me-- I've never written a second draft of anything, in my life! I hope both old readers and new readers are finding this interesting. please let me know what your thoughts are :3c oh, and i guess i should say: new readers, if you want to zoom ahead, the equivalent point in the REV P01 of this story is [ch 21](https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/19912/in-the-shadow-of-heaven/chapter/292408/chapter-twenty-one-just-two-slow-dancers)Wed, 06 Jan 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-007/hm... ok there's a lot going on in terms of "what's been changed from the first draft" but so much of what's been changed is "oh hm this is foreshadowing for act 2 nonsense" so I can't talk about that and risk spoiling anybody who hasn't read act 2 already lmao. for those who have. please enjoy New And Improved Foreshadowing. there's like... so much of it. [personal favorite New Foreshadowing: Halen makes Yan drop the gun.] this chapter is meant to replace the "yan proves she's competent during training" scene that kino gets hurt in, as well as obviously the assassination scene from the original draft. i'm just trying to condense events and make the ones that do happen more meaningful. it sucks that we don't have halen prove that he's hm. willing to let kino get hurt. early on in this draft, but I'll work in halen's Problems. later. yuuni olms, as probably my favorite tertiary character, gets better billing in this chapter, and i think the nomar / wil / yuuni / ungarti drama subplot is slightly better explored earlier here, since it becomes so pivotal later on. maybe it would have been worth it to get a nomar conversation in here, but [shrug] yan, stop obsessing over the "am i a spacer or not" question. it's the wrong question and you will literally never get an answer that feels satisfying. sorry the yuuni dance replaces the iri dance. sorry iri. she'll show up next chapter, don't worry lol. um anyway that's the chapter. enjoy. please let me know what you think, whether you've read the original itsoh or not. I would love to get both perspectivesMon, 04 Jan 2021 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-009/We know that Julian arrived at Yang's house with Admiral in hand; I think there's a gaiden scene? that has him showing up at Yang's door by himself. Anyway I like to think that it's plausible that Julian scooped up Admiral from the side of the road while on the walk to Yang's house and just was like "Yes. This is my cat." Anyway, in some ways I am trying to communicate that things in this universe are different. Admiral the cat survives the main series unscathed, but here arrives in the story already wounded from changes in his fate. I promised that Yang won't die bleeding out from his leg alone; someone came to rescue him, but that doesn't mean that people aren't in danger here. the earth church is back on its bullshit, or honestly it never got off it. surprise, surprise. small, overly protective angry blond boy attempts to murder schenkopp once again. much fun is had by all. julian's hero worship/crush on reinhard is also very funny. julian attends a party in his own house where he's the only person there who hasn't killed someone. the schenkopp/annnerose/ingrid sandwich also just makes me laugh. stupid love triangle bullshit but it's kinda cute anyway. i think i just like writing a universe in which annerose gets to enjoy being wanted, even if she is confused about it at the same time. this chapter is very fluffy. enjoy it for what it is haha. Thank you to Em and Lydia for the beta read. Find me on tumblr as @javert , on twitter as @natsinator . Please check out my rewrites of my original fiction, In the Shadow of Heaven, now being posted on ao3 :3 Proceed directly to the next chapter. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.Wed, 30 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-010/This is certainly the last chapter I'll post before the New Year, and I just wanted to take this opportunity to say thank you all so very, very much. Writing this series has given me something to look forward to during some of the stupidest, shittiest parts of this year. I've been working on it since like, early February, so it really has been almost a whole year of writing A Wheel Inside a Wheel, and if I did not have this to give me some sort of purpose and direction, I really have no idea what I would be doing with myself. Every day I'm astounded and honored that you all are willing to spend your valuable time and attention here on my silly AU. It's very hard for me to express just how grateful I am that you all read this story. I treasure every comment that you guys give to me, and I'm so very ;0; at all the people who have made fanart for this story. Hearing that some of you have read parts of this story more than once, that you've recommended it to friends, or that it's made you just plain happy is like... it's the greatest honor that I can have as a creative person. [I'm also very grateful to everyone who has taken a chance and read some of my original fiction, In the Shadow of Heaven and Arcadis Park. I hope you've enjoyed those as well lol] As always, I love to talk to you all. Please don't hesitate to get in touch with me on twitter @natsinator, on tumblr @javert, or on discord @ javert#5104 . the rest of my work is at gayspaceopera.carrd.co I hope that this story has brought you all some measure of happiness in this very, very stupid year. I'm going to be here writing, just as always, regardless, but I hope that 2021 is an improvement. I hope that you and all your loved ones are safe and happy in this new year. <3 Thank you all so much, again. I really can't express how much you all mean to me. Prosit! Happy New Year!Wed, 30 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-003/Thanks to Jade for the beta read.Tue, 29 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-002/Thanks to Jade for the beta read.Tue, 29 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-005/Thanks to Jade for the beta read.Tue, 29 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-001/Thanks to Lydia, Galvin, and Jade for the beta read.Tue, 29 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-004/Thanks to Jade for the beta read.Tue, 29 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/new-creatures-with-new-hearts/ch-006/Thanks to Jade for the beta read.Tue, 29 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/mais-ou-sont-les-neiges-dantan/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/mais-ou-sont-les-neiges-dantan/ch-001/New chapter of Mais Où Sont Les Neiges d'Antan.Fri, 25 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/mais-ou-sont-les-neiges-dantan/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/mais-ou-sont-les-neiges-dantan/ch-002/New chapter of Mais Où Sont Les Neiges d'Antan.Fri, 25 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/mais-ou-sont-les-neiges-dantan/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/mais-ou-sont-les-neiges-dantan/ch-003/New chapter of Mais Où Sont Les Neiges d'Antan.Fri, 25 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-008/As you can /probably/ tell, this is actually the conclusion to a (hopefully exciting) arc that mainly takes place on the other side of this story. The fact that the timelines are starting to converge is fun, but it also makes things slightly messy, because I’m not writing the imperial section right now (though I want to be haha. I think it will be fun). I hope that having this resolution written beforehand does not remove /too/ much of the tension from the other half of the story when it finally gets written. I am at least comforted by the fact that there will probably be at least one person who goes through and reads all the Yang parts of the story in order, then goes back and reads the Reinhard sections. This person will get probably the best experience of this arc lol. The Cahokia arc is somewhat similar in this respect, though slightly less egregious, since both sides have approximately equal things to be doing. But it will be less tense when I go back and write Yang and Ansbach and Kircheis heading out to fight the Rosenritter, to know that Yang and Kircheis both survive that encounter (if in a slightly stupid state haha). This story is a bit of a choose your own adventure in terms of reading order, except for everyone who’s reading it as I write it. Thank you for putting up with my nonsense. As for what Hilde was actually doing, and what caused Castrop’s ship to just straight up explode, you’ll just have to wait and see :) The N.A.P., or the Non-Aggression Protocol, is a libertarian, uh, maxim? principle? Whatever. Anyway, it basically says that you are allowed to do whatever the fuck, just as long as you’re not “aggressing” anyone else or their property (definition vague), but if someone starts getting into your business, you’re allowed to retaliate as much as you want. I like writing Phezzan as kinda a quasi-libertarian fun zone (note: it’s not fun for anyone who doesn’t have money and protection), so that’s what Reinhard is referring to when he tells Castrop that he could legally kill him for slapping him. Granted, Reinhard kinda tricking Castrop into letting him search his ship is a slightly different matter, so Castrop probably could have put forward a legal argument that Reinhard had violated the NAP by getting the captain to consent to the search... You know it’s a whole thing. Anyway. Doesn’t matter, because Castrop is dead lol. I will probably have at least one more chapter out before the end of the year (though it won’t be the reinhard goes to reinhard jail chapter, it’ll be a “what has julian been up to” chapter), so I’ll see you then. btw, did you read [A House Made Out of Beds](%E2%80%9C)? If you didn’t, you should, and go tell me what you think about it! thank you to Em for the beta read. you can find me on tumblr @javert and on twitter @natsinator. the rest of my writing is at gayspaceopera.carrd.co . catch you on the flip side :3Sun, 20 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/a-house-made-out-of-beds/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/a-house-made-out-of-beds/you are not kircheis. you’re not capable of being kircheis. i had kircheis but now I don’t. you. are not. kircheis. um ok what to say about this one. I feel like it honestly speaks for itself for once lol. someone meaning more to you than you do to them is a rough feeling, especially when you’re competing against a dead boyfriend. or not even competing, really i don’t entirely remember how the image of the setting for the emil and hilde conversation came to me— I probably was just thinking about the logistics of “running your government out of a hotel that you just took over” and was wondering what they did with all the hotel furniture. I was probably also picturing in my brain the very funny “boardroom suite” pic (google it, it’s the first result on google images lol). but the setting came to me first as just a very powerful image and I had to find a scene to write in it. a different set of characters here could have had a hilarious or horny scene but I’m significantly less good at writing humor and/or horniness, so you get angst(?) instead. feel free to appropriate the setting for use in your own fics tho lol. I’d be happy to read more pleasant nonsense (or more angsty nonsense) the title is from the harvey danger song ‘incommunicado’ *i dreamed we were alone all night in a house made out of beds / and nothing happened* as usual, fics in this series are “about” reinhard, but he doesn’t show up. i don’t know if he ever will lol. *now we see things / as in a mirror dimly / then we shall see each other face to face.* or maybe *when the last days come / we shall see visions / more vivid than sunsets / brighter than stars / we will recognize each other / and see ourselves for the first time / the way, the way we really are* @notanewtype on twitter encouraged me to write this particular conversation, though I had been thinking about it beforehand and just hadn’t worked up the motivation to write it down lol. as always, you’re free to make requests but you won’t get follow through unless you give me a brain worm (note: giving me a brain worm is almost hilariously easy) thank you very much to em for the beta read! check out my other LOGH fic series: a wheel inside a wheel. or my other writing at gayspaceopera.carrd.co . You can get in touch with me on twitter @natsinator or on tumblr @javert. Fri, 11 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-007/hello fredrica... here are a few thoughts 1. mr andrew fork, you were treated very weirdly in the OVA. I don’t like you but you live in my fanfiction now. that means I make the rules. and you and mr ansbach on the other side of the story occupy some similar narrative niches. that’s all I have to say about that. 2. i think it’s absolutely hilarious to add new fucked up ship tags that no one will ever write again to this story. literally whenever I get to do it i lose my mind laughing. fork is a little condescending here but he hasn’t done anything truly heinous yet, and fredrica is tired of being single lmao. “my dad doesn’t absolutely hate him and he’s nice enough” . the bar is on the floor, darling. 3. yeah moore didn’t stand a chance against mittermeyer lol 4. why didn’t mittermeyer leave a small occupying force on cahokia? because when he stopped by there he picked up captain hank “gee wouldn’t it be a shame if everybody still on this planet somehow managed to escape unharmed” von leigh. it’s a funny half-reversal of yang and fredrica on el facil during SotP :) 5. lapp survives this btw. the 6th fleet does eventually say fuck it and leaves. i might still kill him but I’m not going to pull a ‘dies in e1 of the ova’ on you haha. 6. it wasn’t as though all of reinhard’s snooping was useless. he was able to get the 6th fleet to move way closer to cahokia— inside the iserlohn corridor— which they weren’t before. but he was not nearly as good at writing coded messages that fredrica would understand as annerose was at sending him a weird coded message. i speak in smoke signals / you answer in code, etc etc etc 7. i feel like in real life, there’s often weird and chaotic things that happen that you, as a singular observer, never get fully explained. like the mine authority going against schenkopp’s orders and sending out a distress signal early. annerose doesn’t see that happen, and lapp has no idea why the distress signal was signed by the mine people, but that’s the reason lol. it worked out for them in this case (6th fleet was able to respond faster) but it could have severely messed up annerose’s mission if it happened just a little bit earlier. 8. i love the ost/westberlins, but mittermeyer and reuenthal need to get their actual flagships, so the westberlin has, sadly, gotten a little fucked here, and mittermeyer will be swapping out for the beowulf at the next opportunity. ok that’s enough rambling thank you very much to lydia and em for the beta read! you can find my other writing at gayspaceopera.carrd.co and you can find me on twitter as @natsinator or tumblr as @javert. feel free to say hello lolTue, 08 Dec 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-006/I’m sorry it took approximately nine million years for us to get here, but I hope you like it haha. The Annerose/Schenkopp drama didn’t last that long b/c making people have weird misunderstanding fights is not actually that fun for me to write. While Lydia was beta reading this chapter, she was like “wow it would be wild if you had Kircheis kill Annerose, or Annerose kill Kircheis right here. That would really show you’re serious.” And, reader, when I tell you I was tempted... You all would have straight up come to my house and murdered me though, probably. This is LOGH fanfiction. People are going to die. But it would have messed up my plans if they died here lol. [It WOULD have been very dramatic...] Anyway, god I want to go back and write the “how did yang end up here, what stupid nonsense drama is he having with ansbach, what was kircheis up to on this ship” sections but for now I guess we’re stuck with reinhard and his shenanigans lol Iphigenia Among the Taurians is a Greek play. Iphigenia being a young woman who was set to be sacrificed (though she was told that she was going to be married off— interesting the conflation of those things lol), but is at the last moment whisked away from danger [replaced on the altar by a deer...] and sent to a foreign land where she takes up a new job ritually murdering people from her original homeland. Over the course of the play, her younger brother, Orestes, and his friend (gay) Pylades, arrive to do some bullshit task set to them by the gods or whatever. Iphigenia is supposed to do some ritual murder to them, but there’s a very fun scene where she learns that this dude she’s supposed to be ritually murdering is her brother, so she helps them escape. I trust you can see the similarities here lol. Thenks Anne Carson for my life, etc etc etc. [this is all to referentially prepare you for the day when I name a chapter Orestes Fasting and Pylades Drunk, which will happen someday :^) ] thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! btw, check out my carrd: gayspaceopera.carrd.co . I worked very hard on it. There’s a couple short stories on there that aren’t posted anywhere else check ‘em out if you’ve got some time to spare. Also, go read Every Hateful Instrument (hosted on here). No knowledge of the rest of In the Shadow of Heaven is required to read it. pester me on tumblr @javert and on twitter @natsinator. see ya laterMon, 23 Nov 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/flashes-and-phosphenes/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/flashes-and-phosphenes/i wrote this like 2 months ago and wasn’t sure if it was good enough to post, but what else am i going to do with it? let it rot in my google docs forever? lol i love mittermeyer but god everything about him is so actively depressing, even though on the surface, he gets the thing that everyone else failed to: he lived, he had a happy family, etc. but... in the early parts of wheel inside a wheel, i make mittermeyer and reuenthal (as commodores and rear admirals) have the flagships ostberlin and westberlin. felix’s flagship here is simply the berlin. [title is from the mountain goats song Paid in Cocaine](%E2%80%9C) *all four of us still fresh and alive / flashes and phosphenes / hard to believe that’s me / strapped in, visibly sweating / happy as i’m ever gonna be / you’re by my side (you’re by my side) / five years left on your car / you’re cashing out / all dressed up / for your date with the emergency ward* thank you to em for the beta read. i’m @javert on tumblr, @natsinator on twitter, and my original fiction is @ bit.ly/arcadispark and bit.ly/shadowofheaven . Mon, 02 Nov 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/untouchable-and-golden/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/untouchable-and-golden/I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: it’s dangerously easy to say ‘hey noodle, do you want this brain worm?’ and hand me a single squirming creature that will enter my brain through my ear, and cause me to write things. Like in Wrath of Khan. (note: I barely remember the plot of wrath of khan and I don’t even think those were worms. and I also think they killed you?) anyway. it’s easy to get me to write fic if a) it’s gay or b) it lets Annerose murder. I want Annerose to murder. It feeds me. more people need to get on the let-annerose-do-murder train. pleaseeeeeeeeeee [link smashing things meme voice] it’s MY canon-compliant fanfic and I get to choose if it’s implied that Annerose murdered Kaiser Friedrich if I want to I love that in all of these standalone canon-compliant fics I’ve been writing, everybody is constantly talking about reinhard but he never shows up. the OVA gives us the “reinhard view” with everyone else in his orbit— it’s one of the joys of writing fic, to explore these different perspectives on that central figure. title is from the White Lies song Fifty On Our Foreheads. innocence made us like soldiers / untouchable and golden / a quilt of darkness darted with our teardrops thank you to em and lydia for the beta read! you can find me on twitter @natsinator, on tumblr as @javert. read my main au, wheel inside a wheel for more murder annerose content. read my original fiction for more attempted regicide @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and more implied murder @ bit.ly/arcadispark . Sun, 01 Nov 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-005/first order of business: if you haven’t read [talking without speaking](%E2%80%9C) or [towards the tail-end of an age that’s almost finished](%E2%80%9C) , you should go read and enjoy those stories, since that’s where I’ve been this past month lol second order of business: don’t expect to see me during november (rip). I’m doing nanowrimo, and because I am a creature who is desperate for approval, there’s this constant battle raging within me between “post every word you write online the moment you write it, so that people can give you attention” and “for the love of god stop doing that so that you can produce a manuscript that could maybe be published one day”. so. this november it’s original fiction hours. i’m writing a horror? story. honestly if you want to read what I’m working on, dm me and I’ll let you into my google doc lol. if not, well, I’ll be back soon enough haha. third order of business: this chapter isn’t the best one I’ve ever posted, but it moves the plot along in the ways that it needs to, I suppose, so [shrug emoji]. next chapter will be [fingers crossed] more exciting. it’s half written. I’ll try to have it done by the end of the month, but I make no promises. you can find me in the following places: @javert on tumblr , @natsinator on twitter , [nparis](%E2%80%9Cnanowrimo.org/participants/nparis%E2%80%9D) on nanowrimo, and javert#5104 on discord. always happy to chat with anybody about anything lol. you can read my last year’s nanowrimo project @ bit.ly/arcadispark and you can read my other gay space opera @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven. thank you to em and lydia for the beta read!Wed, 28 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/towards-the-tail-end-of-an-age-thats-almost-finished/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/towards-the-tail-end-of-an-age-thats-almost-finished/Uhhh Happy Belated Birthday Reuenthal? This (obviously) isn’t part of Wheel Inside a Wheel, but it hits on basically some of the same themes (because I am a predictable creature). I suppose this is a glimpse into an alternate universe where, instead of writing a complicated AU, I was instead writing a quasi canon-compliant novelization of the OVA. That would be a more boring universe, though lol. I just couldn’t get this snippet out of my head, so I had to write it. I think this marks half a million words of logh fanfiction published lol. Why am I like this. Reuenthal has terrible straight sex in his parents’ bedroom because he has Problems. I think that this is implied enough in the text here, but there’s this other snippet I’ve written but haven’t yet published (that is ALSO about Magdalena being generally annoying in Reuenthal’s direction that makes this clearer). That’s part of WIaW though, and I’m not sure when you’ll actually get to see it lol. I simply am interested in having silly continuity between my different fanfictions lmao. The decorations on Reuenthal’s mantle make an appearance in Speaking in Tongues/Talking Without Speaking. I know Magdalena gets approximately five total minutes of screentime across the entire OVA and gaidens but god I love her. A chaos agent after my own heart. I could have written the ‘Magdalena tells Reinhard to be less obviously gay’ conversation but I didn’t think it would be that interesting haha. Title is from the Mountain Goats song Bell Swamp Connection. Thank you to Em for the beta read! You can find me on tumblr @javert or on twitter @natsinator . My original fiction is at bit.ly/shadowofheaven and bit.ly/arcadispark . Mon, 26 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-001/The chapter title is from one of the opening scenes of Lawrence of Arabia. You can see it here https://youtu.be/TvQViPBAvPk Who is Lawrence in this situation? Well, who knows. I hope this opening scene sufficiently introduces us all to the concept of Oh. He Has PROBLEMS Problems. Please pay attention to the following motifs, as there will be a quiz later: light and darkness, deer, thresholds, fire. I’ll take [projection] for 500. Thank you to Lydia for the beta read <3Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-002/Chapter title is from a mountain goats song. https://youtu.be/XErY0ZueBEQ *Because from where we are now, it seems, really That everything is growing in a thousand different ways: That the soil is soaked through with old blood and with relatives Who were buried here, or close to here, and they are giving rise To what is happening. Or can you tell me otherwise? I am going to Alaska, where the animals can kill you But they do so in silence, as though if no-one hears them Then it really won't matter. I am going to Alaska! They tell me that it's perfect for my purposes* if you’ve been reading this story in publication rather than in chronological order, you’ll know that this song also gives rise to the title of the other reuenthal section: Whatever It Takes to Keep the Body Warm. Thank you to Lydia for the beta read!Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-003/@ all catholics, please say a decade of the rosary and a prayer to st sebastian, to guard against plague in this, the year of our lord 2k20 @ all gays, please just go appreciate some gay paintings of saint sebastian b/c gay paintings of st sebastian are really good. @ all gay catholics. let’s all appreciate the choice in carrie (1976) to put a statue of st sebastian instead of jesus in carrie’s weird prayer closet. unfortunately, at the end of this fic, hank von leigh does not develop psychic powers and burn the IOA down. that would be funny, though. if you want to read stories about gays with psychic powers, you’ll have to read my original fiction (shameless plug: bit.ly/shadowofheaven ) @ everybody else. well. hello. nice to meet you. glad you could join me here. is that blink and you miss it foreshadowing? Oskar ‘problems’ von Reuenthal is... hmm... hmmmm. thank you to lydia for the beta read!Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-004/chapter title: https://youtu.be/uRmaIYbLWho I love characters whose symbolic element is water who cannot swim and have never even been submerged. like yes, your personality is so liquid <3 yes you will drown if you look at the ocean the wrong way <3 This scene exists because of the conversation that takes place in chapter three of Servants of the Pharaoh (again, this makes sense to people who have been reading in posting order. to those reading in chronological order, you’ll get there lol). That conversation is metaphorical. Here is a literal scene to accompany it. <3 miscommunication Thank you Lydia for the beta read :3cThu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-005/womp womp I love making up weird religious stuff. it is my favorite. Thank you to Lydia for the beta read!Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-006/explosives in the water main / a blown fuse / college graduation photographs / splashed all over the six oclock news / I won’t be cashing in your policy / until I find out what it is you’re trying to do to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee derivatives of desire: x = a state of being, ie, being good at math class x’ = desiring a state of being, ie “I wish I was good at math class.” x’’ = wanting to desire a state of being, ie “I wish I was the type of person who cared about being good at math class.” x’’’ = being a jerk (thanks for that great addition to the joke, jade) reuenthal gayngst edition this chapter involved a minor retcon of the same section in speaking in tongues, b/c lydia didn’t like my speech there lol thanks to lydia for the beta read!Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-007/chapter title: [this is my father’s world, oh let me never forget](https://ia801304.us.archive.org/21/items/tmg2015-09-12.radio.mp3.128/tmg2015-09-12d01t01.mp3) reuenthal just lies constantly b/c it’s convenient and he doesn’t care. he has many personal issues. this is like the least of them. but you can see exactly where he gets it from! thank you to lydia for the beta read <33Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-008/Mittermeyer...... I love you................ chapter title: https://youtu.be/uW18ujNGiN0 this story is generally a fun exercise in “what did yang know and when did he know it” and filling in gaps with as much plausible deniability that i’m not just retrofitting things to the existing structure as possible. hopefully it’s not too janky thank you to Lydia for the beta read!Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-009/reuenthal’s eyes were already a major symbol in the source text. I have taken it upon myself to play with that symbol a little bit here though. in canon, the black eye is a purely negative symbol that represents reuenthal’s mother’s infidelity and thus every nasty, “anti-social” (in the classical sense) thing about reuenthal, where his blue eye represents, well, you know, rightness. this is such a questionable symbol, esp when it comes to like... ok well he has felix with elfriede, and that’s terrible, but he’s a little blue eyed baby, raised by the blue eyed mittermeyers... ok there’s too much to get into with this because it makes me shriek like a gibbon anyway, here reuenthal’s black eye still does represent these othering qualities, but since he has this othered companion in Yang, this darkness and otherness becomes a connection and shared point of, not pride exactly, but something. his blue eye still represents society, lightness, straightness, but it’s compared to his mother and father, and his father especially is a pretty shitty person. but it’s also like mittermeyer, who is, of the three of them, most attached to the “pro-social” way of doing things. so there’s a tension there. like i said. we’re paying attention to the light vs darkness symbols, right? reuenthal ‘s feelings for yang are complicated. and by complicated i mean. horny, conflicted, and mentally ill. it happens to the best of us. thank you to lydia for the beta read!Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/talking-without-speaking/ch-010/chapter title: https://youtu.be/mZlNGPbS-KA and that’s all I have written lol. well hopefully 50k words is a nice snack. see you soon thank you very much to lydia for the beta read!!Thu, 15 Oct 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-004/Not a ton happens in this chapter but that’s ok haha. Annerose, like many of the protagonists of this fanfiction, is a person with many problems lmao. ingrid and magdalena shaking hands meme but it’s “getting a few too many feelings for a beautiful blonde woman who’s committed to being straight, but is willing to give you just enough homosocial affection that you stay way too invested”. whomst among us has not had an unfortunate crush on a beautiful straight blonde girl. mine was a girl from my high school who was in like all of my classes and who I’m pretty sure in retrospect actually hated me. 2010-2012 were wild years. we can all be glad that it is no longer that time. thinking upon this brings me great shame and embarrassment lmao. i went literally so far out of my way to impress this girl for NO reason. scream. anyway. let he who is without sin be the first to throw the stone etc etc etc chapter title is from the eurythmics https://youtu.be/qeMFqkcPYcg thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! I’m on twitter @natsinator (though I never post lol) and tumblr @javert (where I post far too much).Sun, 13 Sep 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-003/The mental image of relatively little Annerose leading around like 20 rosenritter hunks is /so/ funny to me. I hope you also enjoy it. It also amuses me that Ingrid would spill literally all of Yang’s personal business to Reinhard/Annerose, which Reinhard would actually be interested in (even if it doesn’t involve Kircheis, b/c he hadn’t met Kircheis yet), except for the fact that Reinhard has no clue that Yang was involved in The Ingrid Affair whatsoever. The ongoing plot where everyone is just like... making up their own fun little lie/wrong guess about “who killed prince ludwig” is SO entertaining to me. It’s theme? Ingrid is like... hmm I guess I’m very gay for this beautiful and competent woman. \*is honest and vulnerable to express that feeling\* Annerose, seeing Ingrid’s vulnerability, is like... oh no i feel really bad for this lady :( I want to protect her :( and make her feel better and be happy :( How could we not have Julian spying on the Earth Church? :p Schenkopp/Annerose straight drama ensues. He wants her to show some initiative, since she was the one in pt 2 to be like “I can’t deal with this rn” but tbf that was said in the middle of the worst week of Annerose’s life, so she doesn’t want to be held to it. And now they’re both mutually like “I want him/her to want me” when they both do, but neither are going to make an actual move rn. It’s stupid. They’ll get over it soon enough lmao. “I got forcibly removed from a cult and now I’m sad about it because I LIKED being in the cult” is a thing that I write about a lot. Read my original science fiction, In the Shadow of Heaven (bit.ly/shadowofheaven), but go ahead and skip to act 2 to essentially see this kind of scene play out from Ingrid’s perspective lmao. Except instead of drugs it’s “joining a hivemind that puppets my body” and instead of “escaping from the terrible memories of my abusive husband (who was set to be the leader of a fascist dictatorship)” it’s “escaping from the terrible memories of being kidnapped and tortured (and also from the fact that /I/ am set to be the leader of a fascist dictatorship)” and instead of “being swept away by a beautiful jock blond soldier who pretended to be a space merchant” it’s “being rescued by my ADHD girlfriend and my extremely hot and tragically ‘straight’ bodyguard who both pretended to be space pirates”. Read ItSoH, it’s /very/ silly :p Thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! I’m javert on tumblr and natsinator on twitter if you want to follow me or chat :3 See you soon.Tue, 08 Sep 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/there-will-be-no-divorce/https://nparis.co/works/as-in-a-mirror-dimly/there-will-be-no-divorce/if the only oneshots I’m able to write are mittermeyer depression content, then so be it. this came about because em softboypassing and I were briefly discussing if mittermeyer would eventually tell eva about the whole reuenthal thing. the “I’ve been cheating on you for our entire marriage, and still would be if my boyfriend hadn’t gone and done treason that caused me to kinda have to kill him” is not a fun conversation to have haha. but it’s probably better to have it than not to have it? i’m like truly fascinated by that episode, is it the first one in s4? where reinhard invites eva and mittermeyer over to just have like a weird chat about their marriage. it’s like... the layers... the implications... but all episodes of this show do that to me because I have brain worms!! I suppose that technically this oneshot could have a sequel. if there is demand for such a thing I will write it haha the title is from a mountain goats song [There Will Be No Divorce](%E2%80%9C) (i think this song is better live than on the album, but that’s neither here nor there, look up live versions to see what I mean lol) thank you to em for the beta read! if you want... slightly... less depressing mittermeyer content, read my series, wheel inside a wheel! it’s >400k words long so honestly it should keep you entertained for a good long while. if you want non logh related content, my sf web serial is @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and my mystery novel is @ bit.ly/arcadispark . I can be reached on tumblr @ javert (this is mostly where I am) and on twitter @natsinator. Thu, 03 Sep 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-002/Sorry for the wait on this one ;-; idk what happened. probably a combination of factors that’s not worth going into haha. But I’m still here. honestly you can feel free to pester me if it looks like I’m not writing. i guess sometimes the brain needs a break, anyway. what is there to say about this chapter? muller is like “god this dude is nothing but trouble... unfortunately he is kinda hot [eyes emoji]” sorry muller you do not have a chance, even if reinhard did convince you to defect, which he didn’t really do a very good job of lol. is reinhard von musel a god? no he’s a twink or something :p if you like earth church nonsense, you should go read my original science fiction story, which has the premise of basically “what if the earth church had won the culture war, controlled the universe, and also had magic powers?” since no one actually likes the earth church plotline in logh, this is probably not doing me any favors :p anyway, that’s over at bit.ly/shadowofheaven , and there’s a mystery novel hanging out at bit.ly/arcadispark that you could also read if you like. thank you very much to lydia and em for the beta read! you can find me on tumblr @javert and on twitter @natsinator, though lbr I never use twitter b/c I don’t like it. i post incessantly on tumblr though. anyway, see you soon, hopefully.Tue, 01 Sep 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/lighting-out-for-the-territories/ch-001/[Welcome back my friends / to the show that never ends / we’re so glad you could attend / come inside come inside](https://youtu.be/Bxzxe3bcM1A) Are you all glad to be back with everyone’s favorite terrible little man? I love him but he is harder to write than yang lol There’s so much phezzan nonsense, but so much of it is tragically boring in the ova. Hopefully I will be able to make it slightly less boring here haha. Three guesses as to who the imperial officer who has a bone to pick with reinhard is. The first two don’t count. Did you think I had forgotten about Ingrid? No she’s been having a time getting moderate-to-severe brainwashing/drugging on Earth :( she’ll probably get a chance to talk all about it later. Anyway, title of the story is from [laurie anderson.](https://youtu.be/Scbx5fUt0K8) Title of the chapter is from [political philosophy.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Accursed_Share) Thank you very much to Lydia and Em for the beta read! You can find me on twitter as @natsinator and on tumblr as @javert . My original fiction can be read @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and bit.ly/arcadispark .Mon, 10 Aug 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-018/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-018/We’ve made it. We’re finally here. I hope you’ve enjoyed your trip on noodle’s wild ride. (Or perhaps you are all saying, “Let me off of noodle’s wild ride!”) Okay here are some random thoughts in no particular order. - lol. @ magdalena. I wish she could have been more in this chapter but there was no reason for her to be, and having too many people in scenes is confusing. - still not sure how I feel about this chapter overall but I hope you like it anyway - reuenthal and mittermeyer obviously both have keys to the other’s house. How much use they get is debatable but they’ve been doing variations of that kind of nonsense since they were in school so i just thought it was entertaining to have them continue -reuenthal stole mittermeyer’s car for the sole reason that he didn’t have his own, and mittermeyer would /probably/ be okay with it, on account of using it to purposefully delay flegel and/or kill him in order to stop him from killing mittermeyer. Is this too convoluted? Maybe but honestly I just wanted to have reuenthal do something absurd and fun -Bronner skillfully manipulated kircheis in this chapter :) he absolutely could have just sent that information directly to yang :) but instead he played on kircheis’s known loyalty to yang :) in order to get him to, well, you know :) - we’ve started to wave goodbye to canon events, clearly. Are you surprised that I’m having yang ally with braunschweig? Lol. The earth church is /not/ going to be happy about this. -yang is perhaps making the fatal mistake of “caring too much about iserlohn” ANYWAY I should shut up. This brings us to the end of this part! I’ll be back soon for the next one, with Reinhard and co in the alliance, in Lighting out for the Territories. I really hope you have enjoyed this story so far <3 Thank you to Lydia and Em for the beta read! Find me @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter.. Original fiction @ bit.ly/arcadispark and bit.ly/shadowofheavenThu, 06 Aug 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-017/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-017/Ayyy welcome back to this story! I hope you enjoyed our brief interlude. This chapter is a bit of a bridge to get a few lingering plot points all onto the same page, but hopefully you are entertained by it anyway. So. Kircheis is feeling very alienated from everyone around him. This is pretty unfortunate, but not at all unexpected. He and Martin can’t trust each other, he’s realized that he can’t trust Yang (because Yang keeps like, being dodgy), and although he likes and trusts Hilda, he doesn’t want to drag her into his mess. If only Reinhard were here. :p If you forgot what was going on with Reinhard, you can go back and read ch13-15 of Life out of Balance, but I think the short little summary here is fairly comprehensive. Although I overuse eavesdropping as a plot device (because it’s fun), Kircheis listening in on this conversation to learn about Reinhard is a direct mirror of Reinhard eavesdropping on Kircheis, (because I think that’s fun) Yang is having many and varied personal problems. He’s got one friend telling him to gain rank in order to do treason, his boyfriend telling him to gain rank because power is good, and he’s like oh god I’m working for the literal devil aren’t I? It’s a situation for sure. Anyway should he be dumping all of this on kircheis? Lol no. Yang please have some professional boundaries. Bronner is the worst but also very funny. Thank you all for indulging me with him. There’s like, max two chapters left in this story. Might only be one, depending on how long it takes for me to wrap things up. We’ll see. In any event, we’ll be back with Reinhard and Co. for the next part: Lighting out for the Territories. Thank you to Em and Lydia for the beta read! Find me on tumblr @javert and on twitter @natsinator . Original fiction @bit.ly/arcadispark and @bit.ly/shadowofheaven . See you soon!Sun, 26 Jul 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/whatever-it-takes-to-keep-the-body-warm/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/whatever-it-takes-to-keep-the-body-warm/ch-003/And here we are at the end of this little side story haha. I hope that you have enjoyed reading it! It’s true that no one has actually solved any of their problems; they have just transformed into different looking problems. Reuenthal is... kinda an asshole... but I cannot help but like him anyway. Whatever that says about me, idk. I feel like. Everyone is sorta trying to be sincere, but it’s being expressed in very different ways, and also those ways are somewhat bad, for everyone involved. Worst expression of his feelings award definitely goes to Reuenthal. Probably best goes to Yang, even if he does do it in a weird, self-sacrificing way and also frame the whole conversation in a long diversion talking about power, which. Well. You know. Anyway, we’re done with love triangle drama for a little while— the status quo will remain Mittermeyer and Reuenthal are very much hooking up, Mittermeyer feels bad about cheating on his wife and also kinda guilty about Yang, Yang studiously ignores the fact that this is happening, and Reuenthal is weird and possessive about it. It’s not a great situation, but it’s at least slightly stable, until something knocks it out of balance, anyway. But don’t worry, there’s plenty of other, different drama forthcoming lol. I suspect the title might amuse one person here (aside from Lydia, who suggested it to me). See you next time for chapter 17 of Servants of the Pharaoh! Thank you to Lydia, Em, and Alexis for all taking a look at this chapter. You can find me on tumblr @ javert and on twitter as @ natsinator . My original fiction can be read at bit.ly/arcadispark (you should read that one if you’re missing the hot girl summer 2020 might have been :p ) and bit.ly/shadowofheavenThu, 23 Jul 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/whatever-it-takes-to-keep-the-body-warm/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/whatever-it-takes-to-keep-the-body-warm/ch-002/Long time no see lol. wish I had a coherent explanation for you, but I don’t, so we’ll all just have to accept that this chapter took a stupid long time to write for no good reason and move on with our lives lol. I hope it was worth the wait. I actually do think I know why it took a bit— this chapter is pretty dialogue light, which is always a struggle. Logh is a show about people standing around in rooms talking, and by god, that is what I love to write about lol Anyway, Reuenthal has problems, but what else is new. My computer seems to have died, so this chapter was partially written on my ipad, which is a rather unfortunate chapter-writing experience. Oh well, one copes with what one must, and at least I didn’t have to write this on my phone haha. Chapter title is from a mountain goats song, as per usual. You should also go listen to the song “Going to Alaska” which I have been thinking about a lot. I’d link but not being on my computer makes everything about ten times harder to do, and I am a deeply lazy person. See you again soon! Thank you to Lydia and Em for the beta read :) You can find me on tumblr as @javert or on twitter as @natsinator . My original fiction is at bit.ly/shadowofheaven and bit.ly/arcadisparkMon, 20 Jul 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/whatever-it-takes-to-keep-the-body-warm/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/whatever-it-takes-to-keep-the-body-warm/ch-001/none of you people know how to communicate and it makes you all miserable yang "martyr? no thanks. well, maybe." wenli oskar "yes i do like it if yang has power over me but i do not like anybody else to imply that that is the case" von reuenthal paul "bad vibes only" von oberstein I wonder who did some arson...questions we must all ask ourselves I'm thinking this whole thing is only going to be a few chapters long (four?) I want to keep it pretty contained so we can get back to the main story over in SotP, which we're getting to the last quarter of. but we do have to clear up this relationship's dangling threads first haha the chapter title is from [this talking heads song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olf0o3jfhns) count 'em, one, two loves. which is my face. which is a building. which is on fire. thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! my original fiction is @bit.ly/shadowofheaven and bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter. see you soon!Tue, 07 Jul 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-016/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-016/Trying to gallop through time here a little bit lol. This chapter covers an entire year. Earth church is up to its old shenanigans, what else is new? Kircheis definitely should not have told Martin anything because Martin cannot be trusted to not do things with the information he now has. Also, Kircheis now trusts Yang less, which is pretty unfortunate. Bronner just had to go stick his nose into everybody's business. Yang has a huge vested interest in not letting anybody find out what he knows, though, so he has to try to... obfuscate the issue, if not outright lie to Kircheis, for his own safety. He feels pretty bad about the whole thing tbh Anyway! sorry this chapter took so long to write. I think next chapter might be a side story? (don't hold me to that b/c I might change my mind) but keep an eye out for that. we'll be back here to finish out this part, but I want to write a reuenthal and mittermeyer on capche-lanka side story, so that might be the next thing, since it's that time. ETA: YES, THE NEXT CHAPTER IS [WHATEVER IT TAKES TO KEEP THE BODY WARM](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25123177) . YOU SHOULD READ IT BEFORE MOVING ON TO CH17. Chapter title is from a mountain goats song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YpcwNIfwno Thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! original fiction @ bit.ly/arcadispark and bit.ly/shadowofheaven . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitterSat, 04 Jul 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-015/Magdalena says "just have a threesome for the love of god". Magdalena wants the terrible polycule to look like a giant circle of yang -> reuenthal -> mittermeyer -> evangeline -> magdalena -> yang . there are several problems with this (not least of which being that evangeline is straight lmao) but she is being ridiculous and just refuses to admit how ridiculous she is being, because she thinks that her own ridiculous views are the only things that help her cope with how garbage the world is. reuenthal is having a bad time. while both he and magdalena cope by digging their heels into whatever their irrationality is, reuenthal's irrationality is unfortunately being mean, pushing people away, and hating women (not necessarily in that order). mittermeyer is having a weird (and also bad) time. he copes with this by pretending that if he's Just Good Enough, if he makes promises and then is forced to keep them, if he does the honest thing, he'll feel better. he will not feel better. yang is having a godawful time. i don't think this needs elaboration evangeline just had a guy she's never met before crash her wedding in an extremely strange way and is honestly trying to figure out if she needs to be worried that she's about to get murdered in her sleep. it's canon that mittermeyer is the only one who's heard eisenach talk. but in this story, eisenach has known about reuenthal gay drama before yang even knew about reuenthal gay drama. vote now on your phones about who had the worst time at this wedding / in general haha the title of this chapter is from [my mother's favorite warren zevon song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCpYKJE6LpQ). it's hashtag ironic as it is a cheesy love song about getting married. it is not my favorite warren zevon song. thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! original fiction @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitterThu, 25 Jun 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-014/let's play everyone's favorite game "are they talking about being gay or doing a treason?" martin is like... Teen Activist. bless his heart he feels like he's doing A Lot but compared to like everyone else in this weird group he has fallen in with... lol. that boy loves distributing pamphlets. honestly I think it's sweet and it's nice to get some representation of like, normal dude who lives in the empire haha. kircheis your teacher crush on yang is showing the "everyone except hilde knows hilde is gay" dynamic is very funny. dw hilde you'll figure it out eventually magdalena "I can excuse regicide, but I draw the line at republicanism" von westpfale. she's feeling a tiny bit guilty that she did end up kinda aiding the execution of a whole bunch of innocent people for the crime of killing ludwig, when magdalena a) knew exactly whodunnit and b) got her out of being accused of the crime. I know this chapter is chiller and less exciting than the two chapters that surround it (wedding next time) but the joy of fanfiction does come in being able to have random not much happens character chapters, and also I wanted to give some breathing room between the two intensely drama filled chapters speaking of, here's an illustration to accompany last chapter thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! follow me on tumblr @javert , on twitter @natsinator . read my original fiction @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and bit.ly/arcadisparkSat, 20 Jun 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-013/RIP to Yang's mental health-- I think dealing with the SW program is far more annoying than teaching history. He just has to tell himself "It's just GMing, your favorite part of the game, all of the time :))) " lol In which Mittermeyer is like "today I will completely destroy my life and be miserable about it the whole time" the return of Oberstein (for real). Yang continues to be bad at interacting with nature. oberstein now sees that yang is like, brilliant, and so is compelled to start pushing him in the directions he wants. Yang's description here is stolen directly from [a mountain goats song.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=987MTbOl0mc) I was tempted to name the chapter 'give thanks to the broken bones' but we should save that for later lmao. i have a list of phrases (aka mountain goats song lyrics) that I am saving for the perfect time to use as a chapter title. Mittermeyer says Oberstein has absolutely rancid vibes. Yang says don't be prejudiced. some people just have terrible vibes and there's nothing you can do about that. Everyone in this story is absolutely making some choices. But getting to write Yang and Reuenthal consciously and intentionally flirting with each other was very fun. finally. should tag this one slow burn I guess lmao. there's things that I could say about their conversation but won't haha sorry for the fade to black if you were hoping for something more lol. i don't feel confident enough to write a sex scene so I shall not attempt. you're more than welcome to if you like though :p or simply leave it as an exercise for the reader speaking of chapter titles: [today's chapter title](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j407FVKItPA) . which i have been saving for this moment since forever. a song about definitely having sex with somebody, but told in fragments of fallible memory, as if trying to reconstruct a text from nothing but scraps *There was rain There was wind There was spring coming in There was a feeling approaching doom And I was happy to see you And it was cold in your room And you were warm and that's all I remember And your arms were warm and that's all I remember* thank you to lydia and em for the beta read! you know the drill bit.ly/shadowofheaven , bit.ly/arcadispark for my other writing. @javert on tumblr, @natsinator on twitterWed, 17 Jun 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-012/The ghost of Reuenthal hangs heavy over this chapter as well. Yang "yeah just go look up the treason I did. if you can figure it out that's cool" Wenli. Kircheis needs to learn to be an independent guy. Unfortunately, he's sorta attached himself to Yang on one end and Martin on the other, so there's not really much independence happening here haha. Yang is sorta enjoying taking the more active/mentor role-- "becoming the interested rather than the interesting". Of course, at that point in the chapter, he feels like he's navigating his life very smoothly, feeling like he's done a normal amount of treason in the past, that he's quietly doing good for his students by impressing critical thinking on them now... He's got his life on lock. Of course that lasts like two whole scenes lol. Being reminded of his actual role as a servant of the empire really knocks the wind out of him. It's the return of Oberstein, kinda. Anyway, I love Yang, Kircheis, and Hilde. Great and fun little squad haha. Thank you to Lydia for the beta read <3 Original science fiction @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and original mystery @ bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter. See ya!Sat, 13 Jun 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-011/Black lives matter protests continue. If you haven't yet, I urge you to find a bail fund or community organization to donate to. Please stay safe if you are attending any demonstrations in your area. Kircheis's mom making the (correct) assumption that he and Martin are gay is like a constant struggle in her head between YouHateToSeeIt.jpeg and IPretendIDoNotSeeIt.jpeg Martin has a bit of survivor's guilt going on. Most of his anger is misdirected flailing. I love Hilde and that's really all there is to say about THAT. Kircheis has like, extremely weird and conflicted feelings about Yang. On one hand, there's the sort of immediate 'kindred spirit' attraction that Yang tends to inspire in people, but otoh, Kircheis is like "what possible political opinions could someone who has maybe defected from the FPA have???" and every new thing he learns about Yang makes him more confused. I think it's really funny to finally get an outside perspective on Yang's whole... thing. For some reason all my usual thoughts about chapters have blanked out of my mind lmao. [Oh, I drew this picture, though ymmv on its goodness](https://66.media.tumblr.com/282bd1c9d3522abb84dcab8a7d70f9d7/bf71c56c53f3222e-6b/s2048x3072/834e46054e07a75450630609b85e4b85897ade0a.jpg) Thank you to Lydia for catching all the places where I abandon a sentence halfway through. I'm javert on tumblr and natsinator on twitter, and my original science fiction can be found @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven , as well as a mystery @ bit.ly/arcadisparkWed, 10 Jun 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-010/Serious things first: You've probably been seeing news about the racist murder of George Floyd, and the ongoing worldwide protests against police brutality. I highly encourage you all, if you haven't already, to go donate to a bail fund, a Black Lives Matter group, or (where I personally donated to) split a donation across several different bail funds/relevant charities https://secure.actblue.com/donate/bail\_funds\_george\_floyd . If you are attending a protest in your area, please stay safe. On to chattily discussing the chapter: I suspect that some of you are probably very angry right now lmao. Martin Bufholtz is a man who shows up in one (1) gaiden episode (in HBSHBL), flirts with Kircheis, insults Reinhard, and then dies offscreen. And yet, I think he's very interesting. Kircheis is experiencing the phenomenon known as "dating the only other gay guy in your high school." this plotline was thought up long before racism and police brutality was the biggest item in the news (I think I was mentioning it to Lydia back before the rona was even A Big Deal here, or maybe it was early into the rona times, either way, it was ages ago). it's awkward that it's so timely >.> Kircheis gets off easy because his mother came in to plead his case, had a lot of compelling character evidence (the IOA admission), Kircheis hadn't actually done anything and everybody knew that, and when the other people who were arrested were questioned about him they were like "literally who is that kid. bet he's an undercover cop anyway". so he got off easy easy. the others, not so much. except for Martin, who is totally unscathed except for mentally. oh, and also Kircheis's parents hate him even more now. My policy for character names in narration is generally "use the name that they're referred to by most often in the OVA". There are some edge cases, like Fredrica-- she gets almost equal Fredrica/Greenhill references, I think. In cases like those, I defer to the level of formality that the POV character is thinking of them by. Kircheis and Yang, although those are last names, it's pretty clear that that is the most common way they are referred to in the OVA, so even if they think of themselves as Siegfried and Wenli, it's less confusing to have them not referred to that in the text lol. Is this a bad policy? maybe haha I don't know if you actually "enjoyed" this chapter, but I hope you found it interesting at least lol. Thank you to Lydia for the beta read <3 original science fiction @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven , mystery novel @ bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter. see ya soonFri, 05 Jun 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-009/Overall, not sure how I feel about this chapter, but it's good to post it and be done haha. The Earth church did a pretty good job at getting someone else to take the blame, but it really does make a lot of sense that someone else would be trying to do a "get my kid on the throne" murder than anything else. see the debate about "who killed the princes in the tower?" who do you think killed them lmao. the person who had the most to gain. anyway, getting rid of prince ludwig is good for a whole lot of people, the earth church included. perhaps it wasn't just a moment of terror that ended up getting ludwig killed. perhaps it was, as magdalena suggested during the last part, some slight brainwashing. we just don't know :) anyway, Ingrid is now safely off to the other side of the galaxy. we shall see her again. bronner is really like. so suspicious of yang but cannot actually figure out what yang was up to. he's under the impression that Yang is involved in... something... but probably didn't have anything to do with ludwig's murder. yang very carefully never brings up the idea that ingrid didn't kill ludwig. he's like "magdalena definitely didn't do it" which is true, and sorta derails the entire conversation haha. covering up murdering your husband by admitting to your gay affair. it's a pretty convenient excuse, since it looks like the assassin must have been really unlucky that the pregnant wife was out of the house at the time, since she was probably also a target. the kaiser is an unceasingly weird man, and magdalena feels like her life has been ruined. understandable, but anyway, this concludes the court politics arc, at least for now. next chapter is something completely different. you all might be a combination of very happy and very angry at me lol. thank you to Lydia for the beta read <3 my original science fiction is @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven , my mystery is @ bit.ly/arcadispark and I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter. see you again soon :)Fri, 29 May 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-008/This chapter and the next one were supposed to be one chapter, but then the wonderful Lydia told me, "Noodle, you cannot have a 22k word chapter, seriously." and thus demanded that I split it (which I have). So this is a somewhat truncated chapter, and things get #spicy next chapter, which I guess I'll post tomorrow? or something. who knows. anyway, this is done now lol Chapter title from here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vy0LJnvWpus Poor Mittermeyer, getting yelled at in the bathroom by Magdalena. What does she say to him? feel free to use your imagination lmao. Maybe someday I should write that scene and post it as a quasi-canon side-story. I think it's appropriate that Ingrid, around whom this chapter and the next turn, barely has any speaking lines. That doesn't mean that she does nothing, or that she's not an actor in her own story, but a lot of the themes are about like... people being forced into circumstances that they can't control, and the decisions that they make. Ingrid has had much of the control of her own life taken away from her, even by Magdalena, who takes it upon herself to plot a way to save her. Yang becomes a teacher to get away from Bronner spying on him. It does not really work. Yang's first year teaching experience is based on mine. Picture this: I'm newly graduated from engineering school and very unemployed. My mother is taking my younger siblings to swim practice, and she's chatting with some of the other parents there. As it turns out, one of the other swim team parents is the head of a set of charter schools, who are (for various reasons) always in desperate need of staff. Somehow, the subject comes up that I am "a person who knows how to do math" (lol). Anyway then I'm hired as an assistant to the 7th grade math teacher, which becomes a somewhat strange position b/c she quits, then I'm the building substitute, then the 6th grade science teacher quits and I take over teaching 6th grade science, they hire a new 6th grade science teacher (who promptly has a nervous break and quits), then I take over the 6th grade science class for the remainder of the year. The next year, I'm moved to the high school, where I'm once again an assistant for the math teacher. Then the math teacher quits in november (there's a pattern here...) and I take over the 9th grade algebra class for the rest of the year. That was the 17-18 school year lol. Anyway, I, like Yang, was young and thought that teaching wouldn't be that bad but, as one of my teacher friends put it, first year teaching is like getting hazed every single day. Anyway, I'm an engineer now. (This was a ramble but I don't ever waste an opportunity to tell people about this strange and miserable set of experiences lmao) The Earth church is... convenient for plot but I'm trying to make them be a legitimately developed... thing as well. I think that's one area in which the OVA falls somewhat short. Thank you to the excellent Lydia for the beta read. Check out the science fiction I started writing during my terrible teaching tenure @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and the mystery I wrote after I left that place @ bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter. See you soon with the second half of this chapter!Thu, 28 May 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-007/I chime in with a "haven't you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?" Or really, locking it as the case may be :p sending you all directly back to the mid 2000s, want it or not lmao. Anyway it seemed appropriate for this chapter in particular. I think it's kinda fun to have this complicated web of character relationships, where we don't always or ever see the whole picture. Like what happened between Magdalena and Benemunde and Ingrid while they were at school? What did Magdalena say to Ingrid while they were dancing? How does Ingrid even feel about all of this? We don't know, because we have such a limited point of view into this world-- one that Yang feels like a complete outsider in. Is that me playing with some of our running themes, or is that me being lazy? That's for you to decide :^) This is a depressing wedding for pretty much all involved. Is the court drama nonsense fun for you all? I don't know haha. My natural state is to convolute things very severely, so court drama always feels like it could get more twisty. Princess Amarie is trying to be a straight ally. By that I mean an ally to people she thinks are straight. She's like "aww isn't it sweet that maybe Magdalena has found some sort of star crossed lover. how romantic." lmao. Magdalena your plan has backfired. But whatever. Yang and Magdalena are disaster bisexual solidarity lmao. Thank you to Lydia for the beta read <3 . Original court drama @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven the nonexistent summer of 2020 @ bit.ly/arcadispark. I'm @natsinator on twitter and @javert on tumblr. see you all later!Thu, 14 May 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-006/Idk if I'm completely satisfied with this chapter but it's here anyway haha We're doing court drama now my friends. Ingrid is made up out of whole cloth, but Erwin Joseph has to have a mother somewhere, doesn't he? Wonder what could have /possibly/ happened to make Ludwig die an early death and there be "no strong maternal influence" on the boy? [eyes emoji] My brain has been mush recently and for that I apologize. But hey, Yang getting chased by a flock of geese is pretty funny. I like setting up an intentional contrast between Yang and various other characters via their relationship to the natural world. Yang, who grew up on a spaceship, compares himself physically to Iserlohn fortress-- a manmade object. Every scene where he interacts with nature is kinda ???? at best. There's a deliberate contrast as well between Yang commenting many times how beautiful of a planet Odin is, vs the kind of post-industrial former mill town where Reinhard is sent to live in part 2. Reinhard also has a distinct relationship to nature (he feels at home in it, but also has a running theme of wanting to own and control its beauty, etc). Anyway, I'm rambling and not making a lot of sense here haha. But I'm trying to do something intentional with all of that. Ymmv if it's working or not. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Original science fiction @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven , mystery story @bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter.Sun, 10 May 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-005/Yang "sasses his boss at every opportunity" Wenli. Yang "yes I could take iserlohn if I wanted to but why in the world would I want to" Wenli. Yang "godawful sense of self preservation" Wenli. Lydia said to me a while ago that in order these are the types of people you want in your military: 1. competent and loyal, 2. incompetent and loyal, 3. incompetent and disloyal, 4. competent and disloyal. Unfortunately, Yang has let everybody get a little bit too close to realizing that he is in category 4, baby. (You could put another axis on here for 'motivated' but Yang Wenli's position on that axis varies by circumstance lol. he thinks he's lazy but... he will do nonsense if he has to) As far as the space battle game in this chapter goes, I wrote it by trying to put a Yang Wenli twist on what the wiki described as the fourth battle of Iserlohn. That made my job in writing it significantly easier lol. As for what Yang says afterwards, about the way that the FTL travel works, I make that shit up baby. I don't think it's ever well explained in canon so I'm slowly piecing together my own "rules" for it. Must be pretty awkward to be the kaiser's daughter and eat lunch with his concubine, who's like ten years younger than you are. In this house we feel somewhat bad for Susanna Benemunde, even if she does try to kill Reinhard and Annerose like a whole bunch of times. At this time, the crown prince is still alive, so there's no reason for all of these women to be at eachother's throats over succession for their children (yet). What, exactly, is Magdalena's deal? [eyes emoji] The long awaited Return of Reuenthal. Sorry for leaving you on a cliff hanger but you know I'll be back in like two days lol. As always, thank you to Lydia for the beta read. You can find more fights for succession for the crown @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and more uhhhhh thinking your boss is fucked up @ bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter.Wed, 06 May 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-004/telling your only other friend, who is eleven, to do thought crimes (or real crimes). good idea. Taking a break from space battles to go write a regency romance, or whatever tf this is we know that Merkatz has a daughter in canon b/c it was threats against her that caused him to back the nobles during the civil war. afaik though she never actually appears on screen or has a name. anyway, mine now. trying desperately to get more women into the empire. it's weird and silly that there are relatively few women characters b/c you'd think that a society in which all of the men go get shot at in space battles that regularly kill millions of people at a time, there'd be like, a terrible society gender ratio? maybe they also selectively favor having boy children in the first place to balance it out? anyway what is there to be said about magdalena von westpfalen? a lot lmao. she knows more things than you might realize [insert eyes emoji here] "This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn [the baroness von westpfalen's] barbecue grill and turn the [winter solstice] into the [solstice] of Shit this chapter was probably not drama enough lol. don't worry I'll be back soon with other drama anyway. thank you to lydia for the beta read. I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter. there's more science fiction @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and less science fiction @ bit.ly/arcadisparkMon, 04 May 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-003/The complete absence of Reuenthal has been hovering like a ghost over the past few chapters, hasn't it? I love Mittermeyer but he's having a bad and sad time. Bronner is An OC and a deeply weird and unpleasant man. This universe might slowly have to get filled with OCs because although there are like 9 mbillion canon characters, not all of them fit in the places that I need them to go. If you are deeply allergic to OCs in your fanfiction, then I'm sorry, mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa etc etc etc In This House We Love Themes Lydia says the vibes in this whole section are completely off the walls. Agree? Disagree? This is the "I watched the Spiral Labyrinth Gaiden so you don't have to" chapter. Chapter title is from the Lorde song "A World Alone". People are talkin / people are talkin, indeed. Might even say that they're speaking in tongues :p Thank you to Lydia for the beta read. More weird ocs @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven and @ bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter.Sat, 02 May 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-002/I'm sorry to everyone who last chapter was like "aw I'm glad Merkatz is Yang's mentor, that's really fun". I wanted to say lol that's not going to last very long. But that would have been spoilers :p Anyway congratulations to Yang for making it one whole chapter before doing a treason. Good job. Merkatz doesn't want to completely destroy Yang b/c he personally likes him but he's also like "oh my god this man cannot be trusted on the front lines, he needs to go somewhere else until he can learn how to behave". yang wen-li timeout. Yang thinks he and Oberstein are operating on the same wavelength, but they absolutely are not lmao. Yang is capable of making friends with like, anybody, but you have to think. has anyone ever actually considered oberstein their friend? lmao. "nice to see a friendly face" yang your standards are on the FLOOR. none of the numbers on this show make any sense whatsoever. in the gaiden ep abt el facil (spiral labyrinth #1) it looks like there's like 15 ships that evacuate all 3 million people. lol. it don't make no cents luv. anyway, I also moved the date of the el facil incident to be more convenient to me. don't worry about the dates of anything too much >.> I tried to hint in part 2 that things on el facil did not go nearly as well for the citizens of the planet in this timeline. sucks to suck if you ended up stuck on the planet, which way more people did here b/c yang wasn't there on the ground to help organize everyone and escape, so it probably ended up turning into riots w/ everyone trying to get onto any ship that would take them. and then people who got left behind... well... not an ideal time, we can say, I suppose Merkatz ends up with the bleeding head wound b/c it's plot convenient lmao. had to use that excuse up real quick the names of the ships that Warrensburg and Yang/Merkatz end up transferring to are Prinz der Luther and Prinz der Wale. In the song 'the coast of high barbaree'-- there were two lovely ships / from old england came / blow high, blow low, and so sail we / one was the prince of luther / the other prince of wales / cruising down the coast of the high barbaree Thank you to the wonderful helpful Lydia for beta reading + idea bouncing. More treason @bit.ly/shadowofheaven . um really nothing related to this at all @bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter. see yaThu, 30 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/servants-of-the-pharaoh/ch-001/The name of Merkatz's ship probably wins an award for the world's most obscure mountain goats reference. I had thought of a better one, but then I forgot so I had to think of some nonsense lol. The title of the whole work is also a mountain goats song lyric. Do spacebattles in which thousands of people die count as baby's first murder? If so, then we're starting out strong with Yang's baby's first murder. If not, at least we're starting out with Yang's baby's first real spacebattle. Fuck Oberstein all my homies hate Oberstein, etc etc etc. (Unless you're in the camp of "Oberstein did nothing wrong" in which case, I'm sure you're glad to see him here lmao) Thank you to Lydia for the beta read. More spacebattles @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven um. more responsibility that the main character doesn't want over at bit.ly/arcadispark. Find me on twitter as @natsinator and on tumblr as @javert.Mon, 27 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-015/I love to play an elaborate game of compare and contrast. Anyway, that's the end of this part. Join me next time when we go back to see what Yang Wen-li has been up to in the Empire. My best friend/patient beta reader Lydia is very excited to go back to him lmao. We are Yang Wen-li stans first and human beings second. I'm honestly not sure how I feel about this whole part as a whole. I think that part 1 (Speaking in Tongues) was a lot more thematically/emotionally consistent, and better paced. I'm probably? going to heavily edit this part at some point to make it better. If you have any suggestions, major or minor, feel free to let me know. I'm always looking to improve. Well, we'll see how part 3 goes. Oh, this has no bearing on anything, but it's a funny anecdote so I figured I'd share it, since I love nothing more than writing rambling author's notes: earlier this week, I was chilling in my house, passed out, and smashed my head open on my coffee table lmao. I had to go to the hospital and get 12 forehead stitches. (I am completely fine do not worry.) Anyway I'm going to have a giant anime character-esque eyebrow scar for the rest of my life probably haha. Vote now on your phones which character should get a similar (though acquired in a less stupid way) wound scar :p Thank you all so much for reading and sticking with me on this wild ride. I really appreciate you all so much <3 As usual: thank you to Lydia for the beta read, more weird creepy religion in my original science fiction @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven , more fraught conversations about what you're going to do when you graduate college in my contemporary mystery story @ bit.ly/arcadispark . you can find me personally as @javert on tumblr or @natsinator on twitter.Sat, 25 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-014/I can hear the chorus now, people shouting, "Faster than light travel makes no sense! There's no such thing as simultaneity!" well shush. FTL makes science fiction fun. This chapter is like stupid long. Hope you enjoyed haha. Reinhard's promotion is kinda equivalent to Yang Wenli's post el facil promotion. Baby Julian Baby Julian Baby Julian I think next chapter might?? be the last chapter in this part. ok: Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. More FTL @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven , more questionably deserved promotions @ bit.ly/arcadispark. more me on twitter as @natsinator and on tumblr as @javertWed, 22 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-013/Didn't leave you hanging for too long haha. I hope you enjoy the end of the action! I really am not confident writing action scenes (and yet I end up having so many of them). Hopefully the tension here was right and everything makes enough sense :) [insert some funny joke about Reinhard and Fredrica living in a literal closet together for several days] Fredrica got to do baby's first murder. Reinhard is not good at comforting her. I doubt any of the rest of you all are engineers (I'm an engineer lol), but there's a very glaring thing I like to call "intentional design flaw for plot convenience" living in these chapters. Think it through if you like, or ! **hover here to reveal my dirty narrative secrets** ! Last chapter began with Reinhard musing about commandeering an Alliance ship, but he ends up stealing an imperial one lol. I couldn't let Reuenthal lose too badly. Did he lose? He only lost 1 ship total. It's a mystery. The awkwardness of the Fredrica - Admiral Greenhill - Reinhard meeting is so strong. Oh god I ramble in the author's notes way too much. Here's how it is: thank you to Lydia for the beta read. More ship theft @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven , other things @ bit.ly/arcadispark . I'm @javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter.Sat, 18 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-012/This is a chapter full of slowly escalating nonsense levels. We start out at nonsense level 1 (Reinhard having ego problems) and end at nonsense level...7 or 8. Congratulations to Reinhard on baby's first murder. To think that by this point in the main series he was a vice admiral. lol. the timeline of the show makes no goddamn sense whatsoever. The chapter title and what Fredrica says to Reinhard in the beginning are both references to a fairly famous quote by Archimedes about the power of levers haha. I feel like the conversational pattern where Reinhard says/does something kinda dumb and egotistical, gets called out on it, then doubles down on his nonsense and also gets mad is a pretty common one-- he does it with Kircheis when he's talking about Westerland in the OVA: he takes more blame than is really due, then tries very hard to justify that, and ends up making a mess of it. Anyway, this is way less of a loaded conversation; it's just him being ridiculous for no reason. Reuenthal is always having skype dates with the bros while he's out in space. It's a hallmark of his character. It's fun to make up names of ships. Reuenthal's flagship rn is the Ostberlin, and, although he is not appearing in this chapter, we can have fun thinking about how Mittermeyer's flagship is the Westberlin. :) I decided to split the chapter b/c it was getting too long, so sorry for leaving you on a cliffhanger! Feel free to tell me all about how evil I am. Same as it ever was: thank you to Lydia for the beta read, original fiction at bit.ly/shadowofheaven and bit.ly/arcadispark , I'm on twitter @natsinator and tumblr @javert .Fri, 17 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-011/PER MY PREVIOUS EMAIL Annerose "I'm sending you a picture of my driver's license to show you that I'm a citizen now but really it's just an excuse to show you a nice photo of me" von Müsel. Annerose "somehow manages to look good on her official government id photo" von Müsel Reinhard has thoroughly deputized Fredrica but she doesn't really mind lol. If you're catholic the chapter title will hopefully make you laugh a little, but it's meaningless otherwise haha. I feel like there's a part of me that wants to be an epistolary writer but another part of me could not bear the level of nonsense that epistolary writers create. anyway, here is an elaborate timeskip disguised as an epistolary chapter. We're inching closer to the end of this part of the story, are you all excited? same as it ever was: thanks to lydia for the beta read. I'm javert @ tumblr and natsinator @ twitter. my original fiction can be found at bit.ly/shadowofheaven and bit.ly/arcadisparkWed, 15 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-010/@ fredrica: you're not special for being horny for reinhard. at least while she's at a school with a 12:1 men:women ratio it really should not be that hard to find someone who's actually into her The experience of reading this story must be like playing an elaborate game of compare and contrast between all the different character relationships. Get some venn diagrams, or a big pinboard onto which you put some red string, and start drawing some connections. Reuenthal got accidentally rejected by Yang in a dorm room while drinking out of non-standard glassware. Reinhard and Fredrica both sprung kisses on people they assumed were willing to receive them, etc, etc, etc. What does it all mean??????? Who knows lmao. It means that I love parallelism and that's mostly it. Oh, speaking of other relationships-- I drew a picture of annerose and schenkopp on their first little date lol. It's already hanging out in ch5 or wherever the illustration lives, but I might as well show you here too since I doubt people are going back there full size image available here https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/49771268561\_1f49f5a880\_o.png in case idk you want to use it as a desktop background or whatever lol If you have a burning desire to see any other scenes from this story illustrated, feel free to leave a suggestion. I may or may not take it but I'm interested to hear what you would most like to see regardless :p As always, thanks to lydia for the beta read. I can be found on twitter @natsinator and on tumblr @javert . My original fiction can be read at bit.ly/arcadispark or bit.ly/shadowofheaven .Mon, 13 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-009/Reinhard has been the POV character for 5 chapters, and in 4 of those, he has gotten into some kind of physical fight with somebody over something. (That's not even counting the chapter 1 deer lol.) This is because in part 1, we got to read all about Yang having fun strategy games, and here we get to see Reinhard just going ham. They're foils to eachother, or something. Title is from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UtSKj-Dy0Qw which is a great song on a great album. Fredrica is unfortunately a little into Reinhard. Annerose is all grown up now. I'm so proud. Let's pretend that the timeline to this story a) makes any sense and b) matches canon. I don't think either of those things is true but god I cannot fix these dates it's a mess. Let me know how ya feel :) You know the drill: thanks to Lydia for the beta read, I'm natsinator on twitter, javert on tumblr, original fiction at bit.ly/shadowofheaven or bit.ly/arcadisparkMon, 06 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-008/This chapter is stupid long. So I... apologize? Is that a thing that one apologizes for? Title is from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQ1i278NJsk (well, technically that's a cover version of the song, but it's the version I grew up listening to haha). If you've been reading my original fiction, you may know that I am. slightly obsessed. with weird religious stuff. This is due to my upbringing. Anyway I have not yet successfully written a science fiction story without weirdo religion stuff, and since the earth cult plotline was PAINFULLY underdeveloped in the ova, it's my sacred (lol) duty to fix that by giving some actual personal stakes to the conflict. The Cazerne family is normal even compared to Yang Wen-li, so having them hang out with Reinhard and Annerose, who are both operating on their own different levels of "completely unhinged", is very fun to me. Anyway, I'd love to hear what you think :^) Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. I'm javert on tumblr and natsinator on twitter, feel free to come chat with me there. My original fiction also has someone giving birth, though under even less ideal circumstances: bit.ly/shadowofheaven and my other story also has someone stepping up to fill a managerial role that they did not particularly want: bit.ly/arcadisparkSat, 04 Apr 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-007/I'm having a great time writing Annerose, though I fear that she no longer bears very much resemblance to herself in the actual show, which maybe is an issue. I don't know. I do my best lol. I mean, if we take the ingredients that we know about her from the series (willing to do anything for Reinhard even at great personal cost, tragically Heterosexual [if we accept the premise that she's into Kircheis?], she did chuck a statue at that one guy's head to save Hilde's life so we know that she's willing to be fierce, stubborn [didn't want Reinhard interfering in her life after Kircheis died]) and we surgically remove her from the toxic context of the empire, put her in a position where she's more than just a pretty object, give her screentime, what comes out? Up to the author's interpretation, I suppose. But I think that her and Reinhard are cut from the same cloth (ie, fully capable of being Unhinged). I'm not only on team Let Annerose Be Happy, I'm also on team Let Annerose be Wild. [Rational Annerose Brain: Sois sérieux. Irrational Annerose Brain: Je suis farouche.] I'm sorry if Annerose getting a ton of screentime is not what you came to this fic for lol. Reinhard will take the spotlight again soon (we'll have a timeskip of a few years). He's just still stuck in high school, which is not something I want to write about in the least. What would Dusty Attenborough call his imaginary relationship advice column? Compare and contrast the conversation that Annerose has with Reinhard in chapter 3 with the one she has at the end of this one. Title is from the folk song Barbara Ellen (Barbry Allen). You can listen to a version of it here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9-YK798oU0 Please let me know what you think! thx to Lydia for the beta read. lydia was like "It's parallels that you have people drinking wine out of stupid cups" (because yang and reuenthal did that in part 1) and maybe it is, but only by virtue of me thinking that's an inherently hilarious thing to do. check out my original fiction @ bit.ly/arcadispark or bit.ly/shadowofheaven. I'm javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitter. Feel free to chat with me in either of those places lol.Sun, 29 Mar 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-006/Chapter title is quite obviously from this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ph91\_AVTovE . Extremely 2009 energy coming off that youtube lyrics video. I actually wrote the funny line in question before thinking of it, and then I was like. oh my god. tell your boyfriend if he says he's got beef I'm a vegetarian and I eat leaf When Reinhard feels antagonized by his one (1) remaining moderating influence, I feel like he's way more likely to behave badly. Or at least be blatantly rude. I've been watching through the gaidens rather slowly and in HBSHBL he's so pissed off about everyone and everything, and Kircheis is there to be like "let's think of this as a learning opportunity :) " lol. Anyway there is no way that untrained baby Reinhard would be able to beat Schenkopp. Maybe in a few years, but I think it's clear from the Schenkopp vs Kircheis axe battle in HBSHBL that Schenkopp is better than he is, and I think Kircheis and Reinhard are approximately equals, so [shrug emoji]. Thanks to Schenkopp for teaching us all a valuable lesson about consent, or something. lmao. somebody has to be the one to stand there and talk directly about the themes of the story. When I don't have a Yang "Blatant Authorial Mouthpiece" Wenli around, somebody else has to step in to the task :p Let me know what you think! Hope you're all staying safe out there. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. check out my original fiction @ bit.ly/arcadispark or bit.ly/shadowofheaven . I'm javert on tumblr and @natsinator on twitterThu, 26 Mar 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-005/Dusty Attenborough chief women respecter. Why lacrosse? Because I was writing this chapter and asked Lydia, "hey what sport should Annerose unwittingly sign up for" and Lydia suggested lacrosse b/c her own sister when she was going to [redacted quasi military school] signed up for lacrosse for funsies lmao. It works fine. Of course Schenkopp is a lax bro. They're playing by men's (field) rules here, hence the full contact nature of the sport. What, may I ask, is more aggressively heterosexual than going to a diner to get milkshakes? Nothing. I'm not subverting heterosexuality by having them be filthy while they do it; I just think it's hilarious. Feel free to compare and contrast chapter five of this part with chapter five of the previous part. It's ~parallelism~. Please let me know what you think! If you've got nothing better to do while stuck inside, read my original fiction where nobody plays lacrosse or is even remotely straight: bit.ly/shadowofheaven (that's a science fiction story) or bit.ly/arcadispark (that's a contemporary mystery novel). Thanks to Lydia for beta reading. Stay safe out there, everybody.Sun, 22 Mar 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-004/Schenkopp gives Annerose the coronavirus. I don't know how to write straight people? How do they behave? It's one of the many mysteries of this world. If you've done as I've said to and gone to read my original fiction (bit.ly/shadowofheaven) you'll recognize some familiar faces in this chapter. Yan, Kino, and Sylva are visiting from that story. They'll probably have a better time here than they are having in their own. They aren't important, but please allow me to indulge myself while I amuse you. It's one of the few pleasures I have in life :p Anyway RIP to mildly homophobic Annerose, who is now roommates with two lesbians and the world's most apathetic bisexual lmao. She'll get over it. Anyway, you SHOULD read my original fiction, especially if you are trapped inside your house with nothing better to do ;) Next chapter will also be an Annerose chapter, since she's doing more interesting things than Reinhard at the moment, since he is stuck in high school lmao. Girls go to college to get more knowledge, boys go to high school because otherwise I deem them too young to go anywhere and that's THAT. Please tell me what you think, also thank you for reading <3Tue, 17 Mar 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-129/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-129/New chapter of In the Shadow of Heaven.Fri, 13 Mar 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-003/Reinhard is a vicious little gremlin and I love him. Why do we get a locker room scene? Because I have seen Carrie too many times, and I also believe locker rooms without individual changing stalls are a hate crime against me, personally. I used to be a high school teacher (I taught 9th grade algebra lol), so I have a lot of very particular emotions in my heart about how things go down at schools. I know that Annerose does not have that much personality in canon, but I hope that what I'm constructing feels both true to that and deeper haha. Annerose "The Enormity of My Desire Disgusts Me" von Musel. Lydia said that the descriptive parts of this chapter were very good (#literary), so I hope you enjoy them as well. I love to describe things. You are explicitly meant to compare and contrast Heinessen and Odin. This is a running idea. Anyway, thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Check out my original science fiction @ bit.ly/shadowofheaven for more people sustaining this exact type of finger injury (kinda). I'm @natsinator on twitter and javert @ tumblr. Let me know what you think so far! :)Fri, 13 Mar 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-002/I always did wonder where Reinhard got that gun from in the flashbacks. Anyway stealing it from his father makes enough sense lol. The title is from Sonnet 18 (Shall I compare the to a summer's day), which seemed quite fitting. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Let me know what you think of this so far :) . Read my original science fiction web serial for less holding your own father at gunpoint: bit.ly/shadowofheaven . You can find me on tumblr as javert or twitter as @natsinator.Tue, 10 Mar 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/life-out-of-balance/ch-001/Annerose can have little a personality. As a treat. [Deer hunting] is something that can actually be so [metaphorical]. Title of the chapter is a mountain goats song because Of Course It Is. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Leave me a nice comment to boost my self esteem, then go read my science fiction web serial: bit.ly/shadowofheaven . You can find me on tumblr as javert or twitter as @natsinator.Fri, 06 Mar 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-002/I made the executive decision to make everybody go to officer school here from ages 16-20ish, b/c it was "close enough" to whatever mess of ages looks like, and also "close enough" to people being normal college age. Every time I think about how it's canon that Reinhard has less than a high school level education (he left school at 15?!?!) I lose my FUCKING marbles. Anyway, it's college. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Check out my original science fiction at bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-001/Hope you enjoyed chapter 1, which is essentially "Yang takes the APUSH exam for funsies." Title is a reference to fanwank of yore, but also, because I'm the most pretentious person in the universe, this whole part of the story is, in fact, about. Interrogating the text. This gets brought up so many times. We're operating on levels of pretentiousness heretofore unknown to man. Thank you to Lydia for the beta read. Hey, if you're bored, go read my original space opera @ bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-004/People who have seen the entire OVA will probably find this chapter darkly amusing for several reasons. Saint Sebastian is notoriously a gay icon. By that, I mean that gay people look at icons of him and say, "Yeah." There's an excellent Daniel Mallory Ortberg article (The Martyrdom Of Saint Sebastian, In Ascending Order Of Sexiness And Descending Order Of Actual Martyring) that is worth checking out for more context here. Of course, though, I'm also referencing the Mountain Goats' song, "Hail Saint Sebastian", which is worth a listen. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Read my original science fiction for absolutely zero horseback riding scenes: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-003/If you think I'm being stupid when writing strategy shit. That's totally possible. Feel free to yell at me. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Read my original science fiction for more ridiculous battle scenes: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-005/This whole story is in some ways meant to be a commentary on like, how people communicate information when they can't quite say it out loud. The conversation where Reuenthal and Yang are talking about Alexander the Great is a great example of how things can go wrong-- Reuenthal is talking about how Alexander the Great can be read as being a little bit gay (well. if you do a gay reading of Alexander the Great's life, you end up with the conclusion that he was 'a lot gay'). Yang is not picking up on that hinting whatsoever. And when they're talking about their types of ambitions-- Reuenthal thinks that Yang is talking about being gay, but he's actually talking about being a republican. It's a whole mess. Can of worms. Anyway I think this chapter is really fun. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Check out my original science fiction for no historical references b/c history doesn't exist: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-006/IN THE WAY THOSE EYES I'VE ALWAYS LOVED ILLUMINATE THIS PLACE: LIKE A TRASHCAN FIRE IN A PRISON CELL, LIKE THE SEARCHLIGHTS IN THE PARKING LOTS OF HELL. I WILL WALK DOWN TO THE END WITH YOU IF YOU WILL COME ALL THE WAY DOWN WITH ME. The Reuenthal / Mariendorf friendship connection is something that I made up for plot convenience, but it's not completely implausible or contrary to canon, so you'll have to forgive me for its existence. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Check out my original space opera for too many mountain goats song titles: bit.ly/shadowofheaven Lydia convinced me to retcon a part of this chapter. Don’t worry, you’ll hardly notice the change.Sat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-007/Sorry, little Hilde. Your mother is dead in canon so dead in fanfic she probably will also be. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. My original space opera also contains several dead mothers, as space operas are wont to do, for better or for worse: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-008/Mittermeyer's here! Mittermeyer's here! I love him! He's here! Title is a line from the poem Kubla Khan by Samuel Taylor Coleridge, chosen because at one point someone in here says something about the SW games separating the wheat from the chaff, and also because the historical "Kubla Khan" was a leader of the mongol empire, and the cavalry game is based on that sort of thing. Literally this is the most obscure line I could have picked but this is the type of person that I am. Thank ye to Lydia for the beta read. Once again, there's absolutely zero cavalry battles in my original space opera that you can read right here: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-010/Eschaton is a game played by the characters of the novel Infinite Jest, in which they simulate global thermonuclear war by playing tennis. Yes, I am aware that referencing a minor plot point in Infinite Jest for use as a fanfiction chapter title makes me. The worst person on the planet. But I have always been like this and I refuse to stop. Every three seconds while writing this story, an alarm should sound that says "The author is going off on a tangent about The Nature Of The Text again." Luckily, Yang Wen-li makes an excellent authorial mouthpiece, and works as such even in canon. He is great. Thank you to Lydia for the beta read. If you want a space opera where space battles are conducted between like, max two ships at a time, and it's a big deal when even that happens, read my original fiction: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-009/[insert entire lyrics of Mr. Brightside right here]. This line in particular was chosen because the previous hunting chapter was also named after a saint. :^) Reuyang shippers hate area man for pulling this particular stunt. Area man is only moderately sorry. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Read my space opera for characters who are already well aware that they are gay: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-011/You are humbly invited to compare and contrast the home lives of our three main characters. Title is obviously another mountain goats song, because I have a small brain that is made up about 50% of thinking about how to best repurpose tmg lyrics for use in other things. You will go ice skating and you will think gay thoughts. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. There's no ice skating in my original science fiction, but it does have a lot of other stuff: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-012/Custody of the eyes is a phrase that I stole from, well, I mean catholicism in general, but you should all go watch The Novitiate, which is a decent lesbian film about nuns. There are very few decent lesbian films in this world. In any event, in that film, there is a scene where the characters are instructed not to look at anyone else, because it makes you think about them. It's a scene that has stuck in my memory very clearly for several years. Gautier's last insult is kinda bad, but I needed him to say some ridiculous thing to get Reuenthal to punch him. Whatever. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Read my original science fiction for more gay longing glances: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/wiaw/speaking-in-tongues/ch-013/Pomp and Circumstance is the name of the music that's played at basically every graduation I've ever had the misfortune of attending, though really just the middle section on repeat forever. And here we come to the end of part one! I hope you've enjoyed this journey on noodle's wild ride. This whole thing was written in like uh. 20 days. Part two coming [mumbling] sometime. Part two will feature the other neglected half of this equation: Reinhard, of whom we have seen neither hide nor hair thus far. I would love to hear what you've thought of the story. If you're fanart inclined, please, [eyes emoji], or if you have any desire to translate this text into another language, you have my explicit permission (please link me, even if it's a language I don't speak lol). As always, thank you to Lydia for beta reading, and if you're bored while waiting for me to write part two of this story, please feel free to check out my monster original space opera (it's many hundreds of thousands of words long), so it should keep you entertained for a good long while: bit.ly/shadowofheavenSat, 29 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/a-friend-is-a-friend-and-we-both-know-how-this-will-end/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/a-friend-is-a-friend-and-we-both-know-how-this-will-end/The episode titles "Live by the Sword..." / "Die by the Sword" is a variation on a quotation from Matthew 26. In that quote, Jesus rebukes one of his followers for cutting off the ear of one of the soldiers who come to arrest him. Anyway, that scene in the bible takes place in a garden, Gethsemane, hence the garden here. Of course, Reuenthal is not a very good analogue for any particular biblical figure :p Third person present is a very dreamlike tense imo. Title is from Sufjan Stevens' song, Death with Dignity. Is it ridiculously self-indulgent to write a story like this? Oh, almost shamefully so haha. I never write fanfic, so enjoy my self-indulgence while it lasts. If you like my writing in general, though, feel free to check out my original space opera, In the Shadow of Heaven, over at royalroad [ bit.ly/shadowofheaven ]. Tue, 04 Feb 2020 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-128/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-128/(2021 noodle: On royalroad i filled this chapter with 23k words of lorem ipsum so my wordcount stayed correct, because i am truly so vain. but ao3 is a classier website than that so i'll resist the temptation) Bad and naughty authors get put in the pear wiggler to attone for their crimes. This thing is littered with typos b/c twine doesn't have spell check. Also I just want it to be done. Sorry about [waves hands] all of this. I won't say we'll be back to regularly scheduled content soon b/c I don't want to make a liar of myself, but I'll try. I've also been writing something else. You can alternately read it on ao3 if you want to be ahead of what's slowly being posted here. Hope you all are doing well. I've missed you lmao.Sun, 29 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-127/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-127/chapter title is a riff on the concept of a faustian bargain. the epigraph is a riff on 'can the circle be unbroken' and obviously the title of that fake song is from simon and garfunkle lol if you don't remember who Farisk is, Sid and Aymon met him back in chapter 100. Is Yan getting in over her head here? perhaps! I suppose I should warn you about two things: we're about to have some timeskip shenanigans, and also the next chapter I believe is going to have a weird and thrilling new format. buckle up your seatbelts for that one. it might bbe a hot minute before I get to post it, so this will almost certainly be the last chapter of the year. happy new year everybody! vote in the poll! I want to know what you think, though the poll results are not legally binding to what I do work on next. can you believe that we're coming close enough to the end of itsoh that I have to start thinking about this? lol and make sure you hit that 5 star button on the way out, leave me a review, check out my other complete story, etc etc etc. you know the drill :pThu, 26 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-126/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-126/I actually finished this chapter last night, but I'm trying this new strategy of not posting at hours of the day when literally no one is around to see it :p we'll see how long I keep up with this strat, b/c posting chapters is my favorite thing to do lmao. I have a very sad life if that's what brings the most excitement to my week. hope you all had a great christmas / continue to have a happy hanukkah / first day of kwanzaa if ye celebrate it anyway, consider giving me those sweet sweet 5 stars, and maybe also hopping over to read my other fiction, Arcadis Park. It's pretty good :^) I figure if I pester you enough about it, maybe some of you will actually go over there and read it hahaSun, 22 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-125/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-125/not posting chapters at stupid o clock at night? wild aymon chapter? been about a million years I am loath to close. We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory, stretching from every battlefield and patriot grave to every living heart and hearthstone all over this broad land, will yet swell the chorus of the Union, when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature. from lincoln's first inagural address. anyway we know exactly how 'we must not be enemies' turned out for the US right on the edge of the civil war lol happy first night of hanukkah, and if I don't see you again before the 25th, merry crisp moose if you're tired of winter, read my other story (set in the heat of summer) and give it a sick 5 star rating. you can rate this story 5 stars as well while you're at it :p I'm extremely shamelessFri, 20 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-124/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-124/the smart and normal thing for me to do would be to bank chapters and try to post at a steady rate but clearly I have zero self control everyone @ sylva: hey, sylva, please stop keeping this horrible secret that you really should just admit to and apologize for sylva: No. title is from a mountain goats song, as it usually is :p https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QT8qfJlda2A leave me a 5 star rating/review here, if you're feeling generous. or pop on over to my other fiction, Arcadis Park, and do it there. You might enjoy it :^)Tue, 17 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-123/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-123/wow, two chapters in a week? It's practically a miracle title is from Laurie Anderson's song Love Among the Sailors ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-PaTTVtgKA ). the inside of my head sounds like any random laurie anderson song at all times. quite obviously, the song that Halen sings (and the one in the epigraph) is meant to be sung to the tune of the Battle Hymn of the Republic, which has spawned many, many alternate lyric versions (incl. John Brown's Body). The specific alternate lyric version that I am riffing on here is Blood Upon the Risers ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzrYgDnewSI ). Though, in general, BHotR is relevant because ItSoH act 3 is titled 'The Eyes that See the Glory', which is a lyric from that song. hey, if you're feeling generous, why don't you rate and/or review this story 5 stars :p And maybe check out my other story and give it a five star rating, too :^) feel free to place your bets on exactly what punishment sid has in store for himselfSun, 15 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-122/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-122/yeet. couple things geiersburg fortress is the name of an object in my favorite anime of all time, legend of the galactic heroes, which I beg you all to watch. anyway, the reason I chose it as a chapter name is that in the course of the show, it is decided that a cool and fun plan of battle would be to crash one giant fortress into another one. spoiler alert: this does not work. anyway, just as no one in LOGH expected someone to strap a whole bunch of warp engines (or whatever they're called in the show, idk) to a fortress, no one in ItSoH expected that two ships would ever crash into eachother on purpose. if you don't know a ton about physics, the opening quote and the part about bi-directional doors might make no sense to you. basically, if you have a massive pressure difference on one side of a door, it will be extremely difficult to open it into the higher pressured space. this is (part of) what killed the crew of apollo 1 [ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apollo\_1#Hatch\_design ] , being unable to open the door to their capsule, as the pressure was higher inside than outside. in normal operation (being in space) this is normal (ie atmospheric pressure inside, vacuum outside). when your capsule is hyperpressurized and on fire, and the people on the outside can't open the door to get to you, you are extremely screwed. the tune of the song that sylva sings is very obviously cribbed from the song 'camptown ladies', which is the unfortunate combination of being both racist and incredibly earwormy. and when Kino thinks about "This is the time, and this is the record of the time" she's quoting a Laurie Anderson song, which is thematically appropriate as it is about an airplane crash. Good evening, this is your captain. We are about to experience a crash landing. [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1fhRtrC2Cw ] Do any of you even read my extensive authors notes? lol. hope you're all doing well. remember to go read and review my other, (complete) story, Arcadis Park. It's a mystery. It's got f/f romance. It takes place in a decrepit waterpark. What more could one want from a story? seriously, I would appreciate you reading and rating it-- I want to scam it onto trending :pTue, 10 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-016/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-016/New chapter of Arcadis Park.Tue, 03 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-015/New chapter of Arcadis Park.Sun, 01 Dec 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-014/New chapter of Arcadis Park.Sat, 30 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-013/the end : ) I guess I could have made this chapter longer, and discussed what happens when they actually get back to arcadis, but maybe all of that is better left to the imagination. it is slightly too trite to have a story end with the two main characters driving off into the sunset, but that doesn't mean we can't discuss them doing so! anyway, I would like to give a huge thanks to everyone who has read, esp Yakosh-- comments feed my ego lol. feel free to give me a nice fat 5 star rating/review :p additionally, if you have any general or specific thoughts on the story, including "what should I do with this manuscript that I now have" feel free to toss them out there couple things before we go-- this story is almost entirely based on two things: a horrible event that was big news in a nearby state several years ago [ https://www.heraldnews.com/news/20160624/five-years-later-why-behind-marie-josephs-death-in-cloudy-fall-river-pool-remains-mystery ], and the defunctland action park video [ https://youtu.be/flkW-ceNvck ]. I highly recommend you give the video a watch-- it's a good one. I'd also like to shout out the concept of pinhole photography. Nicole Croy's website has some particularly good examples of the kind of images that Bay was making-- including one of a pool [ https://www.nicolecroy.com/long-exposure-pinhole ]. Although Bay's exposures were much shorter, the images share the same fundamental qualities. And if you haven't heard the song Benson, Arizona, you can listen to it here [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eTa2vXL7FI8 ] I'd also like to shout out my two siblings, v and f, who are lifeguards, and who hate me :^) And remember, as always, my favorite clickhole image of all time thank you again for reading!Fri, 29 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-012/Well call the police, go ahead call your shrink Call whoever you want but I won't stop the car Well call the police, go ahead call your priest Call whoever you want, call in the National Guard! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nXYcXuyfdA probably only one chapter left, which I will hopefully write and post tomorrow, and then I can get back to my long abandoned child, ItSoH. hopefully having a month's worth of critical distance from it will help me work through the problems that were making me be so slow and bad at writing it :pWed, 27 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-011/any of you seen Thoroughbreds? that movie would be significantly better if the characters had gotten together lmaoMon, 25 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-009/sneaking in a blade runner reference before november 2019 endsSat, 23 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-008/if you've never made a pinhole camera, you should. it's a very fun thing to do. my royalroad profile pic was taken with a pinhole camera, back when I was in 12th grade and absolutely obsessed with photography. is this story simply a way to force you all to read about my past obsessions? yes, but we can all be glad that photography is the deepest the wormhole of my obsessions goes for this story. if i have said anything dumb and/or wrong about photography, please feel free to correct me. I haven't touched a film camera in several years because film is too expensive for me to justify lolWed, 20 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-007/see, now I feel like the plot is going /too/ fast. I'm not used to this sensation. it worries me.Sun, 17 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-006/At the physically demanding outdoor summer job that I worked at very, very briefly, (though this did not happen while I was working there) a shed caught fire and burned down and someone died. I draw from life experience to write rando stories.Sat, 16 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-005/Do I know anything about how police operate? No. But I can make things up and justify it by saying "these are small time cops whose usual oeuvre involves catching drunk driving teens and yelling at them about how much their parents would be disappointed in them" I mean if I've done anything egregiously wrong, lmk I guessSun, 10 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-004/bad and naughty mystery writers get put in the wavepool to atone for their crimesTue, 05 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-003/and the smoke that will carry us away / yes sing for the damage we've done / and the worse thing's we'll both do / open your mouth up and sing for me now / and I will sing for youSun, 03 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-002/heeble bleebleSat, 02 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-001/Hey, if you're someone who's never read my work before, go read my other story (In the Shadow of Heaven) which is significantly better. If you're someone who has read all of ItSoH, sorry for not working on that :pFri, 01 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/arcadis-park/ch-010/Come all you bold fellers, where'er you may be / Come set down a-while and listen to me / The truth I will tell you without a mistake / Of the rackets we had about Blue Mountain Lake / Derry, down, down, down, derry down https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADW7JhfmVz0Fri, 01 Nov 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-121/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-121/like Sid, I could say it has indeed been a while. I asked how mad you would all be if I took november to write a different story, and got a whopping one vote telling me it was ok, so I went ahead and did that haha anyway, we're back now. should be regular (ish) updates again for the forseeable future you should go ahead and read my other story, Arcadis Park! it's 100% complete, and I have it on good authority that you'll maybe like it, even though it's different from ItSoH in most ways. But if you're looking for something to read, you could do far worse than that lol. Anyway, if you do read it, please give it that good old rating/review :^) once again, sorry for the long hiatus, I doubt it will happen again, since I want to get ItSoH finished, ideally by like april/may of next year. we'll see how well that goes. it was nice to take a break and work on something a little different though haha. slightly less stressful to start something short and fresh than to work on something that's like... three quarters of a million words longSun, 20 Oct 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-120/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-120/bit of a longer chapter today. this puts me at the 750k mark in my writing software, but I think I have a bit more stuff in there than I have on royalroad, so I guess I have to wait a little bit longer for that achievement lol I've accepted that I'm never going to get anywhere on the popular rankings, but I'm slowly but surely inching my way towards the coveted front page of longest stories on this site- I think I'm at #42. is that a good thing? idk anyway I'd really appreciate it if you left me a review/rating/comment or told all your friends (especially those who are prone to review writing) to read this story :p see ya laterMon, 14 Oct 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-119/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-119/\*picks up Yan and dusts her off\* haven't seen you in about a million years. (this is because she hasn't been doing anything interesting, trapped on the First Star lmao) is Yan's casual disregard for safety standards born from a) overconfidence or b) a casual disregard for her own life last chapter, Sid was like "boy I definitely want to comandeer the Fleet ship I'm on and go catch Yan at Xuanhuan" and Yan is like "Yep we're continuing there as planned". next chapter we shall see what Kino and Sylva are up to. hint: they're headed there as well. the cup runneth over anyway, happy thanksgiving if you're canadian.Tue, 08 Oct 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-118/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-118/Does the "character says the story title in a line of dialogue" moment hit? Should I not have wasted it on this chapter? This chapter accidentally got way too long and convoluted, but I didn't want to split it up and have multiple Sid chapters, so we're just going to pretend that the upcomming Yan and Sylva chapters don't convolute the timeline. I should probably put timestamps on these things. Whatever. Have a good Yom Kippur if ye celebrate it.Sun, 29 Sep 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-117/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-117/Sylva and Kino's personal hells in this chapter are fairly obvious. Keep's, though, is mostly to do with the fact that she is a new(ish) mother, and she just watched this literal child die a horrible death. Not to mention, she just learned that she and her child very very much could have died, because Sylva is not a doctor, but pretended to be one during her childbirth. Anyway. Things have been slow because I have been running headfirst into a wall exemplified by a conversation I had with my friend, Lydia. We were watching Legend of the Galactic Heroes (a fantastic anime, go watch it), and here is what was said about a certain character Lydia: I know he's going to die, but I don't want it to happen soon. I want more time for good things to happen before then. And that's how I feel while writing act 3 of this story. Because all of the many meandering """good""" times are over and so it like legit hurts me when it's time to sit down and write something bad happening haha. Rule number one of writing is don't get too attached. Well, failed step one. But I also do need to get back on track. My goal next month (and now that I'm saying it here, you have to hold me to it) is to write 2k words per day, every day. If I don't do that, yell at me. Btw, I'd really appreciate it if you all gave me a rating or review, or told any of your friends who may like this story about it. I thrive on positive attention. It's a character flaw of mine :p Happy Rosh Hashana to all my Jewish readers.Sun, 15 Sep 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-116/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-116/Title is from the Wolf Parade song Dear Sons and Daughters of Hungry Ghosts https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=phGMMSUdN8w So imagine you're Bina's adoptive parents a bunch of years ago. They're rich people with massive connections to the Guild. The Guild has just gone out of its way (and disobeyed the Empire) to rescue a whole lot of children from a planet infected with a really horrifying plague, partially out of the goodness of their hearts, partially because their leader, Ungarti Vaneik, wants to test what the Empire (and Sandreas in particular), will let him get away with. Great. They've rescued all these horribly traumatized children. What are they going to do with them? Well, they ask their planetary connections which planet will take them in, and a long chain of favors are cashed in leading to them all being dumped on Hanathue. Mr. Warez, Bina's adoptive father, is heavily involved in this chain of favors, and he's getting a lot of flack on Hanathue because of all of the anti-refugee sentiment that's being stirred up. It's not looking great for his business if he doesn't make some moves to ameliorate the situation. So he asks his wife what he should do. And she says, well, wouldn't it look nice of us to adopt one of these kids. Good PR move. And he says, okay, well let's get one that's young enough and cute enough that she won't cause a problem. So they walk through and inspect all these kids, and there's one horribly cute kid, little girl, Bina Mejia. Only problem is, she has this ugly, nonverbal older sister who clearly hates life. Well, that's not actually that big of a problem. They adopt the baby, the older sister goes to a group home, all is well in the world. They send some money along to keep the older sister fed and clothed and housed, and they let her see the baby every once in a while. They're not monsters. They just don't want /that/ child. And then they find out that the older kid is a sensitive, and, well, that's nice, but she still doesn't seem to be going anywhere, so they send some money along to the Academy to make sure that all of this kid's incidental expenses are taken care of, and they pay her no mind. And then years later it turns out that that weirdo fucking kid becomes apprentice to First Sandreas, and the Warez family is like. Well. Maybe we should have taken them both in. But it's way too late, and Kino's life has gone unavoidably off the rails.Sun, 08 Sep 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-115/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-115/Sorry for the /very/ silly chapter title :^) But every "good" buddy cop movie (lbr the only buddy cop movie worth watching is Hot Fuzz) starts out with two people who hate eachother's guts, don't get along, are forced to go on Adventures together, etc It might be too silly and I might change it at some point tbh, but it made me laugh for now and that's all that matters haha Hope you've been doing well.Tue, 03 Sep 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-114/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-114/ok, the real reason I've been writing backstory chapters is beecause I have fallen for my own trap, which is to say, living in the past rather than contemplating the future the past is not a home you can go back to, and yet, here we are. probably we should all enjoy it while it lasts, because "Aymon couldn't particularly disagree. He could feel the seconds slipping away from him, each one calling out as it passed, 'This is the best things will ever be again.'" being caught up by the tide of the past and endlessly retreading old ground (for good or for ill, in memory or in repeating old mistakes) is a theme of this story, I suppose yell at me to advance the plot and I'll probably do it. but you have to yell at me. serial fiction writing really is a blessing and a curse because I can just do whatever and can't be stopped once I finish these backstory chapters, I'll probably move them to the place they were always intended to go, which is to say at the beginning of act 3 instead of scattered randomly in the middle hahaSat, 31 Aug 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-113/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-113/You have to yell at me if you see me not working on this story. I live on validation and that's about it. Pls give me what I crave, and I will keep writing. idk what's gotten into me latelyThu, 15 Aug 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-112/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-112/There's probably a lot that I /should/ say about this chapter. But it's also 1am. Anyway, if you couldn't tell, I reread Dune recently >.> Poll is just for my own curiosity, tbh. I love learning what you all think, so I must find ways of drawing the opinions out of you, like blood from a stone. Is it a cruel question to ask? You have as many votes as there are options, so you can vote as many times as you like. See ye later.Tue, 06 Aug 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/one-might-almost-say-there-will-be-no-more-events/https://nparis.co/works/misc-fanfiction/one-might-almost-say-there-will-be-no-more-events/This fic was written ages ago at the behest of @baketothefuture on tumblr. I'm uploading it here for posterity. A few very minor edits have been made to the version posted on [tumblr](https://javert.tumblr.com/post/186756928647/baketothefuture-ask-and-ye-shall-receive).Sat, 03 Aug 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-110/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-110/Oh I'm fully aware that probably half of you will hate this chapter lol. We'll be back to normal nonsense next time. I had fun writing in a weird style, though, so you know. Sorry for the long period between updates. I do my best but my best has not been very good lately. Please let me know in the comments exactly how bad you think my short story (or is it technically a novella at this point) writing is. I probably could have restructured this but I'm so bad at editing it's not even funny.Tue, 30 Jul 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-111/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-111/this is a chapter that nobody asked for, but it's almost the one year aniversary of me starting to post this story, and I felt like writing some backstory sooooooo anyway you finally get to find out how stardrives are made lol. I feel like this should have been entirely predictable based on the available information. if it wasn't, I'm sorry that I did a bad job at hinting lol. for the record, most of them do go 'dormant' after they're installed on a ship, like Halen says. Farewell is particularly chatty b/c Halen is right there to talk to but that's an unusual case. Halen is not exactly making stardrives in the way that an Imperial employee would. His emotional power does give him a unique way to do it. see you whenever. maybe with more backstory, maybe with the real chapter I have halfway written. it depends on what I feel like I supposeTue, 30 Jul 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-109/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-109/Go directly to the next chapter. Do not pass GO. Do not collect $200.Sat, 13 Jul 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-108/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-108/Sylva is so frustrating to write because she is not a good person lol. She also straight up doesn't try to be one because she doesn't like... it doesn't enter into her head to care about that as a concept. She cares about what she cares about, and everything else is like, whatever to her. There's lots of different types of 'not a good person' in this story, and even then, Sylva is kinda a rare breed. A very true neutral type character. Leave me a comment or something. I'm lonely. Hope you all had a good week. See you when I see you.Sun, 07 Jul 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-107/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-107/In my thoughts and in my words / in what I have done and what I have failed to do / through my fault, through my fault, through my most grevious fault it's from the confiteor do I make character relationships to easy? I'm always worried that I am and that there's not enough #drama. but the thing that Iike writing about most is tenderness, so honestly I'm bad at making them be mean to eachother too much lol anyway, I'm doing my best to tie all the plot threads that I opened hundreds of thousands of words ago back together haha. you didn't think the supership was gone for good, did you? :p sure it vanished into the night (at least it got that one right) but ships are slippery things, bound to turn up at inconvenient times see you when I see you. hopefully some time during the week lol. I'm working on being better at posting, I swear.Mon, 01 Jul 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-106/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-106/I'm still actively working on this story, and I'm still aiming for my old schedule, I just had a really rough and exhausting June. Fingers crossed that July will be better. I'm really sorry for the delay, whatever my excuse is. Hope you're all doing well. See you on the flip side.Tue, 18 Jun 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-105/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-105/I'm extremely sorry for missing Friday's upload. I've been spiraling into depression or whatever recently. If I don't post a chapter, feel free to yell at me. I'm fairly motivated by that sort of thing. Anyway, instead of writing, I spent a bunch of my weekend saying to myself "You can paint once you finish writing" and then I didn't do anything, and then i was like "Why am I holding productive creative pursuits hostage from myself" and then I painted this picture of Sid https://66.media.tumblr.com/a92e14a3d16334ba19f1b11bbf097b7a/tumblr\_pt7xpzaaIj1qdzjqso2\_1280.png I've just been struggling to write and wanting to paint, but I don't have the hours in the day to do both. anyway. that is to say again, sorry for missing my chapter upload date. I'm still aiming for 2 chapters a week but you know. life is hard, unfortunately. Hope you had a goodTue, 11 Jun 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-104/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-104/Day late and a dollar short on this chapter. Sorry. Halen's both a terrible person and a terrible teacher, but I'm attached to him anyway. Such is the way of things.Sun, 09 Jun 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-103/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-103/get a postcard from the giftshop / to let my family know I'm doing fine / looking up at a map up on the ceiling / to find the place where we all meet up, further on down the line https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6Kqdu8\_w9c Thanks for sticking with me for 100 chapters. Love you all. See you tomorrow.Sat, 08 Jun 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-102/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-102/mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa on not getting this chapter out yesterday. I'm very sorry. In my defense, I said a very sudden yes to going to see a concert, I saw the Rural Alberta Advantage [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atq0SG4ocsU ] in Boston. See, I listen to music that is not by the Mountain Goats. Sometimes. :p I know that many people are angry with me, and the way that this story is going. I know this because my views per chapter have taken a deep dive over the past month (like a 50% loss of readership lol), and the people who are reading this and are still here aren't the ones who have left, but I would like to know, if you can, what your thoughts are right now. I'm probably not going to change my plans for this story, but I would like to know, just so that I do know, what it is people are looking for, and what people don't like. I would also say that you all trusted me all through act 2, which, to put it mildly, also angered some people haha. I know that readers trust only goes so far, but I hope to earn and continue to earn yours. That is to say that I really, truly, honestly, from the bottom of my heart appreciate all of you. The time investment that you have all put into reading this story is significant, and the interaction I get from you in comments/reviews/etc honestly means the world to me. It's the best feeling in the world to have people looking at and engaging with something that I have made, and that's what keeps me going. I have a story to tell, but it's not worth telling if people aren't listening. So thank you. Thank you so much. Anway, I've rambled enough. I'll actually see you tomorrow with the 100 chapter bonus chapter, and then again on monday with a regular chapter. Hope you're having a great weekend < 3Tue, 04 Jun 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-101/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-101/Yan does not like to be herself, which is why she has these conflicting desires to self isolate and join up with other people. Sylva is interested in Yan-as-Yan, and not Yan as a tool or a stranger or what have you, and is also not interested in letting Yan take refuge in being someone else for a while. Yan doesn't think that Sylva can both understand her and love her, so Yan pushes her away to protect herself. It's a real mess of an interpersonal relationship. I would say that Sylva's actions are highkey immoral here. But it's interesting to write about how other people percieve Yan's Emotional Problems. We see enough of it from inside Yan's head, it's good to see how it affects other people, because I can garuntee that Yan is not thinkin about that! Anyway, their relationship couldn't be without conflict forever, even though it would be nice for it to be. I was orignally going to have a lot more happen in this chapter, but we'll have to save that for later. I made a new cover image. What do you think? ( https://66.media.tumblr.com/bfbef6a02242c390e819e1372bb72e0f/tumblr\_phdlslX5Q81xnm75po4\_r1\_1280.jpg ). I painted it in gouache and scanned it in. I love painting. Anyway, I miss my fish already, but someone told me that the fish made this story look too much like a cultivation novel lol. I change the cover to this story a lot >.> This is like cover v4. Hope you all have a fantastic week. I'll see you on Friday (lbr, 2am Saturday).Sat, 01 Jun 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-100/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-100/I'm not super satisfied with this chapter,but hey, at least it's written and done. Such is life. Sometimes we write an unsatisfying chapter, but the nature of writing web serials means that instead of looking back at the past, we have to keep plowing forward on schedule. Anyway. Hope you enjoyed it even if I want to dismantle it and put it back together in a new shape. I also hope it's not completely incoherent. It's 4am here lol. The song in this chapter is very obviously stolen from "Down in the River to Pray". Who shall wear the starry crown indeed. Yan has quite a high body count at this point, but she has still managed to avoid killing somebody right up close, which allows her to detach herself from it a little. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Only you can decide. Also, this story just hit 600k words which sure is. Something. I've noticed that a lot of people who aren't RR registered users read this story. If any of you want to talk to me off of RR, feel free to stop by my personal discord https://discord.gg/2fu49B28nu . It's a pretty quiet place lol, but hey. If you're not leaving comments, I have no idea what you think. (And I'm perpetually desperate to know what people think) Have a great weekend. I'll see you on monday (hopefully at a normal human hour of the day)Mon, 27 May 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-099/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-099/I don't know if anybody picked up that something fucky was going on with the whole Falmar story-- if you recall way, way, way, way back during act 1, when Kino/Aymon/Halen were on Tyx III, they were discussing the reason why biological weapons weren't used to clear out the population, and they were weirdly cagey about it, this is the reason. It's kinda a once burned/twice shy type situation. We also saw back in Kino pt I that there was that rando dude who brought her and her sister out of her family's home-- a Falmar native. Anyway. I play the long game with some of my information reveals lmao. Is teaming up with the Green King and his weirdo cohort a good idea? That remains to be seen. But they're going to do it anyway, even though it makes them all miserable.] Thank you to everyone who's left me a comment/review/rating/etc. I appreciate you all very much. Hope you have a great week. I'll see you on Friday~~Sat, 25 May 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-098/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-098/I was going to call this chapter "three apprentices and a funeral" after the movie "three weddings and a funeral", but then I googled it and turns out it's actually four weddings, and there's only one apprentice present, and I haven't even seen the movie, I just think it's a fun turn of phrase, so I gave up on that idea. anyway. if you faked your own death or whatever, would you watch your funeral? I'm interested to know. Halen, who has spent his whole life being unable to properly memorialize people in his life who have died, does not get to give a eulogy here. but Yan isn't dead, so whatever. we can, however, safely assume that Maxes delivered the letter that Yan gave to him. Sid's having a rough time. Understandably so. I should honestly change my 'updates monday and friday' to 'updates monday and saturday at a disturbingly early morning hour' >.> also, with this chapter, we've officially crossed the word count of war and peace. I'm a regular tolstoy over here. I'm not claiming that I'm a better writer than he is, but, let's be honest with ourselveves. I could not get through war and peace, but somehow you've all made it here. that counts for something, at least :p Hope you're all having a great week. I have a long weekend, which I am somewhat looking forward to. On one hand, don't have to go to work, yay. On the other, it's kinda just more time to sit around in my house and be slightly lonely and sad. At least I have writing fiction to comfort me haha. See you on monday, or at a disturbingly early hour of tuesday morning :/Tue, 21 May 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-097/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-097/Sometimes you just have to write exceptionally cheesy romance content for like 200 words, then move on with ya life. That's just the way it is sometimes lmao. Anyway, the lesson here is, Kino fucked up big time, and now literally no one trusts her. So maybe don't be a spy and/or traitor and/or whatever the fuck Kino was. Probably definitely for the best that she didn't mention Yan, because that would have gone over real great. Kino is a hot mess, but I also love her. Anyway I'll give you three guesses who they're going to end up meeting with at this meeting. First two don't count. Sorry for the slightly late chapter. I guess it's still only 9:30 on the west coast :p Leave me a comment/rating/review if you are so inclined. I love to talk to you all and hear what you have to say. Hope you had a great weekend and that you have a good upcomming week. I'll see you on Friday!Sat, 18 May 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-096/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-096/Title in reference to walt whitman poem [ https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/45474/o-captain-my-captain ], but really it's just that Yan is meeting her own captain, it's funny. It's funny guys I swear. Epigraph is an obvious joke on Finnegan's Wake [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6QTwZDzak4 ]. Not the tune or anything, just like the concept. Stardrives. Here are some things you know about them (why can't I do a bulleted list in author's notes?). 1) They can use the power. 2) They treat the ship and its inhabitants as though they were both a body, in that it's difficult to use the power offensively on it. 3) Resources available to your average pirate + the power allows someone to make one. 4) They have a "shelf life" of about 100 years, and they wear down the longer they go. 5) It's extrordinarily hard to link them together, to get them to work cooperatively. 7) They're very, very dangerous if made wrong. All of that should maybe be putting some thoughts into your head. Anyway, I thought writing this meeting of equals was pretty fun. Bittersweet, but you know. It's time for Yan and co to stand on their own, without parents, without masters, without hive minds dictating their every move. That's growth or whatever :p Sorry again for the somewhat late upload. Vast majority of this chapter was written today b/c I'm the worst. But at least it's here. Not super proofread, but here nonetheless. Oh, btw, if you like my story, you should check out The Solstice War. It's quasi historical military fantasy. I recommend it b/c it has a big cast full of gay people, and it's good. Not that I'm trying to send you all away, but if you're desperate for something new to read :p It's very long, but the author has just now started cross posting it to RR. Hope you all had a great week. I'll see you on Monday.Tue, 14 May 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-095/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-095/epigraph is a very obvious ripoff of Rattlin Bog / Green Grass Grew All Around, which are both very similar songs. Yan is really like, peak unreliable narrator. Her skewed modes of thinking bleed into the narration, because I write in a very close third person. So when the narration says things like "everyone knew she was not a good person", that's not like, a reflection of reality, that's a reflection of Yan's catastrophizing. Anyway, trauma messes you up real bad. In that way, Yan and Kino are very much two sides of the same coin. They're like waves that are constructively and destructively interfering with eachother. Sylva and Iri are also straight up not helping. Iri thinks she's helping, but is this really like, healthy? Prooooobably not. Anyway, is "growing things as a metaphor for healing" too overplayed? Probably, but it's good stuff, so you can't stop me. Anyway, we're deep enough into the story that I feel like I can share the character playlist I made for Yan. Just on youtube, since 8tracks is a dead website and I'm lazy lmao. [ https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJLxkD64HrCrCcGwTgyXtW78TKdendjSg ]. [2021 noodle note: there is a series of explanations for each track on royalroad that i'm not going to copy here] Please feel free to leave me a comment/review/rating/etc. Tell your friends about this story :3 Hope you all have a great week. I'll see you on friday. This chapter is delayed until after midnight due to me spending an inordinately long amount of time writing this author's note. whoops.Sat, 11 May 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-094/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-094/Remember kids, domestic violence is not sexy. But, your partner being like, super strong, and reminding you how much power they have over you, and you trusting them not to hurt you regardless... definitely at least like a little bit exciting. Sorry for the late upload and short-ish chapter. It's still friday on the west coast >.> This week has been a little busy. Hopefully this weekend will be chill and I can get some good writing time in. Because I love to mercilessly roast myself, I made some fun fun bingo cards that you can play while reading this story. Not a drinking game because you would straight up die. I'm nothing if not extremely predictable, but hey, that's thematic and stylistic consistency, I guess :p Consider leaving me a review or a comment. I'd love to get my score back over the 4.5 star hump >.> Hope you all have a fantastic weekend, and if you have a troubled relationship with your mother, as un-terrible of a mother's day as possible. See you on monday!Tue, 07 May 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-093/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-093/I did warn you that this chapter would probably get delayed until tuesday. Sorry about that, but such is life. Friday's chapter should be normal. I was originally going to have a several chapter interlude going back to the past, but then I realized I didn't have the appropriate PoV banner prepared, and I was too lazy and crunched for time to make one, so we'll just have to find a better place to stick that interlude in somewhere else. You may have noticed that I've been adding chapter titles to chapters. It's an ongoing project. If you have a suggestion for any chapter titles, feel free to leave them in the comments of either this chapter or the one you want to title. I just think that chapter titles are kinda fun, even if they're not exactly "professional", which was my reluctance before. But you know, at this point, maybe we've long passed the boundaries of professional. Iri is like, "I will force Sylva to behave with basic human decency, so help me God." Can't really blame Sylva for being kinda a dick to Kino though, because who honestly wouldn't? Hope you all have a good week. I'll see you on Friday!Thu, 02 May 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-092/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-092/I know I said I'd never write a 14k word chapter again... well this one's only 13k. I definitely should have split it, but whatever. I don't think I'm as good at writing action scenes as I am at writing other stuff. It's definitely something I need to work on. I hope you enjoyed this anyway. And so we come to the end of act 2. I hope you all enjoyed your time in The Realms of the Unreal. It's been 47 chapters with a total of~329k words. That's 1171 pages in double spaced times new roman 12pt font, for the curious. As I said on monday, I'm going on a mini vacation this weekend. I'll attempt to have a normal monday chapter out, but it might end up getting pushed to tuesday due to me being out of the country. That's why you're getting tomorrow's chapter a day early :p Please consider leaving me a review or rating in celebration of finally reaching the end of act 2. I really do want to thank you all for sticking with me through this. I have some really exciting things planned for act3 and I'm very eager to share them with you. Hope you all have a fantastic weekend. <3 edit 5/5/19- added title. references clemency for the wizard king [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3OsEN6YMPrQ ]Mon, 29 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-091/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-091/Pretty sure this was the hardest chapter I've written thus far. Legit tears were shed. Anyway, if you thought Yan's long dark night of the soul had already happened, nope. Here it is. Though it's more like the lengthy grey mid-morning of the soul, since not that much time has passed since she went to the Emperor, and that was at like 9-10am. Any of you read/watched les miserables? Anyway in les mis, the main character, Jean Valjean, at the beginning of the story he's given a chance to not go (back) to prison by a guy he just robbed. Later on in the story, that act of goodwill causes him to sacrifice his standing in society to save someone else. Yan's character arc bears some obvious resemblance. Media I consumed while writing this chapter, in order to "get in the mood" so to speak: Reservoir Dogs, dir. Quentin Tarantino, and Ezekiel 7 and the Permanent Efficacy of Grace [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0FNOStUqhGY ], of which John Darnielle says "Because when you torture a person to death, who do you really torture? Yourself. That's the lesson of Catholicism. It's the lesson I've come to share." The whole time I've been writing I've been saying to myself "don't get attached to Halen. he does evil things on the regular. don't get attached. don't get attached." anyway. failed step 1. FYI, I'm going on a mini vacation this upcoming weekend. Expect chapters to be posted on Thursday 5/2 instead of Friday. I will try to have Monday's chapter out as usual, but since I'll be driving like 10 hrs and be out of the country, it might not happen. So you'll get Friday's chapter 1 day early, and Monday's chapter 1 day late. It's like daylight savings time: your fall self steals an hour from your spring self :p Unless the next chapter gets so long that it has to be split into pieces, it should bring us to the end of act 2, at last, at last. Leave me a review/comment/etc. I'm sorry for making you all suffer. See you later!Fri, 26 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-090/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-090/Well. Here we are indeed. I did warn you that the times of nice good things happening were over in this chapter. Did you see this coming? I have been trying to drop hints for the past 500k words, but I'm not sure if I was too subtle or not subtle enough. It's a delicate balance- I wanted this to be shocking but obvious in hindsight; not sure if I succeeded. Kino music: The Maid on the Shore - Stan Rogers [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o2N3CgU5S8o ] Anyway, let me know how you feel. Angry? Happy? Vindicated? This chapter is getting posted early in the day b/c I just couldn't wait.I'm nervous to see how it will go over with all of you. Leave me a review/rating/comment. Tell your friends about this story. <3 Hope you have a good weekend & last day of Passover. I'll see you on Monday. edit 5/5/19 - added chapter title. references the epigraphs of several earlier chaptersMon, 22 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-089/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-089/Conversation with the Emperor next chapter. Let me know how you think this will go :^) There's some foreshadowing in this chapter. Blink and you miss it. How do you like the illustration? It's either undersaturated or oversaturated. The problem with digital art is that I can't tell what is real on my monitor. I actually wrote the last third of this chapter months ago. I just really needed that #catharsis at the time. We're all done with catharsis now though. Make sure you vote in the poll. It's vitally important that I get the answers to this question. Please tell all your friends about this story, and leave me a rating/review/comment. I love you all. Hope you all had a great weekend. I'll see you on Friday. edit 5/5/19- added chapter title. continuation of several earlier chapters. reference to gordon lightfoot's song high and dry [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_AXmO78Lgp4 ]Fri, 19 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-088/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-088/It's been about a billion years since we've had an Aymon chapter, hasn't it. Just picture Sandreas and Halen wearing tee shirts that say "Evil dad to three disaster children". That's basically the dynamic. Sandreas is just as emotionally incompetent as one would expect, since he's spent the past 20 years or whatever offloading all of his many and varied emotional problems onto Halen and never dealing with them :p Just a warning that there is one (1) chapter left of calm nice things happening. If you're Jewish, hope you have a great Passover. If you're Christian, have a good Easter. If you're neither of those things, enjoy your weekend free of religious obligations haha. Please consider leaving me a rating or review or comment. <3 See you on Monday! edit 5/5/19 - added title. a deliberate misuse of this theological argument https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/God\_of\_the\_gapsMon, 15 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-087/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-087/So the poem Wild Geese by Mary Oliver is an extremely Yan type poem. Here it is, quoted in its entirety You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on. Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes, over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers. Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again. Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination, calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting - over and over announcing your place in the family of things. I put it here b/c at least one line in this chapter is stolen directly from it. Anyway all Yan wants is a place in the family of things. I was also thinking. Everyone here has seen Neon Genesis Evangelion, right? I assume that everyone who hangs out on these nerdier corners of the internet definitely has. Anyway it has come to my attention, or at least floated into my brain that Yan:Shinji :: Kino:Rei :: Sid:Asuka. [ : reads as 'is to' and :: reads as 'as'] The parallels aren't exact, but they aren't nonexistent either :p This really has nothing to do with anything, and has no relevance to the ultimate path of the story, it just refused to leave my head until I wrote a rambly authors note about it. Please leave me that 5 star rating, if you would, or a comment, or anything you choose to leave me. I very much appreciate you all for reading my story and talking to me. Hope you all have a fantastic week. I'll see you on Friday!Fri, 12 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-086/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-086/And thus Sid bows out of the story until some point during act 3. According to my poll from like a billion years ago, Sid is literally the least popular character, so I doubt anyone will be crying too much about this. Probably the 'who's your favorite character' ranking has changed significantly over the past idk 60 chapters, so I will be redoing that poll soonish. As far as Kino's "plans" But, Mousie, thou art no thy-lane, In proving foresight may be vain; The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men Gang aft agley, An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain, For promis'd joy! Please leave me a comment, or if you feel so inclined, a sweet sweet review. Let me know what you think is going to come of Sid's little letter. :^) Hope you all have a great weekend. I'll see you on Monday. edit 5/5/19 - added chapter title. mainly referring to the gap that kino hates between sid's real self and ideal/possible selfMon, 08 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-085/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-085/I hated writing this chapter lmao. I love Sid but he is not really... a good person... He's a mess in a lot of ways. Kino is also a mess, but in a totally different direction. Anyway I love Kino. But we have now come completely to the end of Yan's captivity. There's still a bit more to go before the end of Act 2, but we're over the hump. You can take a deep breath and relax for maybe the next few chapters. Or don't. That's your perogative :^) Leave me a comment telling me what you think! Or give me a 5 star rating, that works too :p Thank you to Unice for looking over the first scene in this chapter. Hope you all have a great week. I'll see you on Friday! update 11/1/19- added chapter title so hold me mom in your long arms, so hold me mom in your long arms, your petrochemical arms, your military arms, in your armsFri, 05 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-084/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-084/I'm sorry for this being a shorter chapter AND leaving you on this tiny bit of a cliffhanger, but you only have to wait until monday. I so rarely write chapters that switch between different POVs, I'm not sure if this "worked". Next chapter will also be multi pov like this, so look forward to that, I guess. My next poll should be "how much do polls anoy you?" :p Leave me a comment, talk to me, etc. I love to leave unnecessarily long responses to people's thoughtful comments haha. Consider also giving me a rating or review. My poor rank could use some help >.> Hope you all have a great weekend. I'll see you on Monday! /// EDIT: omg I just realized this is 500,000 words. we hit half a million, hell yeah. thank you all for sticking with me lmao. it sure has been a ride. <3Mon, 01 Apr 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-083/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-083/Well, on Friday I gave you a chance to bruise my ego with a poll, now you can stoke it :p Granted, I need a bigger ego like I need a hole in my head, but I also don't want to fiddle around with the way that I'm writing and mess up something good. Plus I just kinda like putting out polls. They're interesting. I think I'm gonna do them more often haha. Although this is april fools, I don't have the energy to write an april fools chapter, so here's a normal chapter for ye. I shudder to think of what an april fools chapter for this story would look like. Real nonsense would probably go down. I was really really sick this morning, so I took the day off work, which frustrates me. I don't like being sick lol. Anyway that's why you're getting this chapter not at midnight haha. Don't be shy about leaving me a rating, review, or comment. I love to talk to people and hear what you have to say about this story. Hope you all have a good week. I'll see you on Friday!Sat, 30 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-082/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-082/This is kinda a recap chapter/informational chapter/bridge to the next section of act 2. we're really coming close to the end, probably ~10 chapters left until we hit act 3. Maybe. The chapter breaks I had originally planned out had us ending act 2 at around ch91, but I haven't actually been consulting that plan as I write. I just sorta decide what needs to happen, then I write a chapter about it. Is this the best way to do things? Maybe not. I'm sure you're all very grateful that I did not include a long drawn out sequence of Iri going to fetch a radio. Sometimes I can just say that things happen without describing them beat for beat. It's amazing, I know :p Anyway I tried to get this chapter out before midnight, but we're like 15 mins late, so oh well. Please take a second to vote in the poll. I'm trying to improve with your feedback, so I'm interested to hear what you all think needs work. If you have specific suggestions, criticisms, or thoughts, please shout them out in the comments. I really want to make this story better haha. Hope you all have a great weekend, I'll see you on Monday! update 10/28/19 - added chapter titleTue, 26 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-081/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-081/Of all the character arcs in ItSoH, Sid's is probably closest to the traditional "coming of age" story. He's a hot disaster mess who just wants to be treated like an adult, but he had chronic foot-mouth disease and tries way too hard to be seen as powerful. I think he just picks the exact wrong moments to stand up for himself. Also, Sandreas is just t e r r i b l e at being a mentor. If there's one thing Sid (and Kino) don't need, it's secondary Sandreas-trauma that he's passing down. But they're gonna get it! Literally no one in this story is capable of letting go of the past at all. And neither am I :^) As for why Cesper changed his mind and let Sid back in? Well. It's easier to push someone away than to let that person walk away, so it was worth it for him to go after Sid. Plus they do like eachother, and Sid is kinda sorta trying, so he can have another chance. I was waiting until it posted for me to post this chapter, but I wrote a guest chapter for Fantasia (ch73)[ https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/98/fantasia/chapter/346752/chapter-73 ]. If you just can't get enough of my writing, go ahead and check it out. Fantasia is absolutely nothing like ItSoH, so it was an interesting challenge to step out of my comfort zone and try to write somebody else's characters haha. If you haven't yet, I'd love if you left me a rating and/or review. They really help, and I try to use your feedback to improve! I also love it when people leave me commentssssssssssss Hope you all had a great weekend. I'll see you on friday! update 10/27/19 - added chapter title. runnin over the same old ground / what have we found? / the same old fear / wish you were hereSat, 23 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-080/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-080/It's still friday somewhere in the world... I swear....... Sorry about such a late posting. I'll try to do better in the future. But you're getting it before I go to bed, which is what counts, maybe. Anyway, the Mother is... a complicated persons. She does deeply care about Yan, but also how do you navigate bodily consent when your whole existence relies on sharing physical and mental control of a big group of people. To clarify, the Green King is a man, but the language that the Mother thinks in doesn't have concepts of gender- they instead differentiate between if someone is a parent or not (hence mothers and daughters). The Mother thinks of the Green King as 'she', and that's why he's referred to that way in the narration. Sorry if this is confusing. Anyway, well, the Mother wasn't /actually/ going to hurt him, but it is something to give him a tiny taste of his own medicine. How does Yan feel about being a participant in this? The same way she feels about almost everything: deeply conflicted. How does Iri feel? Slightly terrified of Yan, as she probably should be. She's not the same person she was back when they first met, or even when they last saw eachother. It's been a long journey for both of them. Please consider leaving me a review or rating if you haven't already. I really appreciate all the feedback you give me, and I try to take it into account while I'm writing. Leaving comments also makes me happy. Hope you all have a good weekend, I'll see you on monday! update 10/26/19 - added chapter title. it's song lyrics from laurie anderson's song O Superman [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vkfpi2H8tOE ]Mon, 18 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-079/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-079/If you see any major errors in this chapter please let me know- I haven't proofread it as much as I usually do because my brain is not cooperating right this second. Anyway, some of you voted for more worldbuilding, and some of you voted to get to the mother, so we managed to do a little of both. And hey, at least Sylva draws the line at stealing from literal children! For the record, this planet is not meant to be a utopia or anything. It's just meant to be kinda weird. Sylva doesn't have the context to make anything other than surface level observations about it, and I as the author am not going to go deeply into the political world of this planet (or any others) right at this second. That's what act 3 is for :p I'm tentatively calling act 3 'The Eyes that See the Glory' [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VsE9T4Sr30 ]. Let me know if you think that's stupid or acceptable. If you want to know when we'll get there, the answer is 'uhhhhhhh someday...............'. Act 2 is truly neverending. That's not true. There's a clear end in sight that I'm eager to get to, but a couple major things still clearly need to happen before we arrive. Consider leaving me a comment or a review or something. If you ask me questions I might respond with my sneaky face :^) Anyway, hope you all have a great week. I'll see you on friday.Sat, 16 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-078/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-078/It's been a hot minute since we had a Sid chapter (though it's been even longer since we had an Aymon chapter!). Shorter this time, but we needed to get the ball rolling. And I can't be writing major, massive chapters every day haha. Not sure if it's worth it to include the obvious follow up to the ending lines of this scene, where Sandreas gets pissed as hell. I'm working on this new thing called "don't be so fucking verbose". It's not going great because I just am compelled to write logically every scene and interaction that follow from each central point. Screenwriters say "come in late, leave early" and clearly, I have not accomplished that. Well, maybe I left early here, in a sorta dramatic fade to black sorta way, but did not enter late haha. Anyway it's still /technically/ Friday, for those of you in California. Sorry for the slightly late posting :p You may think it's trite to call shit 'the adversary' but I work in [redacted] and people honest to god say stuff like that. Like literally I ripped it from a series of posters that I walk past every day on my way in the door haha. You have not seen the wild propaganda that's out there in our normal everyday world. anyway, I think the main lesson here is that subtlety does not exist, and thus I am justified in being somewhat unsubtle in my fiction. :^) But all of the pieces are rolling rolling rolling Leave me a comment telling me what you think or a review or what have you. I love to read what you have to say. Hope you all have a fantastic weekend. I'll see you on Monday!Mon, 11 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-077/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-077/Here's the thing about posting chapters as I write them. If I have 9000 words of stuff to fit into a chapter, I'm gonna have to write all those words real fast. This is why I ran out of backlog chapters in the first place >.> On the plus side, it very much forces me to be productive. On the downside, this is stressful lol. I didn't even manage to fit everything I wanted to into here! This is because I'm allergic to being concise, clearly. Anyway, if you want to picture the type of beach that Iri and Sylva landed on- I'm mostly imagining Beavertail State Park, which is my favorite "beach". I loved going there as a kid. There's something really fun about climbing on rocks. I described it a little differently- there aren't many boulders, really, and not much in the way of gravelly rocks, but you know. It tis what it tis. Sylva is sorta feeling the whole "realms of the unreal" vibe that Yan also got when she came to this planet. Yan and Sylva (and to an extent Iri) have both stepped very, very far out of everything they've ever known. I say Iri only to an extent because she had the best idea of what she was getting into. And so the would be rescuers have become the kidnappers. Sylva and Iri are both kinda "true neutral" characters, if we're talking DnD alignments. Sure, it might suck to kidnap someone and invade their brain, but gotta do what you gotta do, right? Right? Probably not, but they're going to do it anyway. Consider leaving me a comment or review or anything like that. Hearing your thoughts makes me happy. Actually, real quick, let me know how you feel about timeskips. I'm not sure how much more of Sylva and Iri dicking around on this planet I want to write before they make it to the Mother (not a spoiler to say that's their end destination lol). Should I skip directly to that, or should I write another chapter in between? I guess that is one of the good things about writing chapters as I go, I can poll you all. Hope you all have a great week. I'll see you on Friday!Fri, 08 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-076/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-076/Squeaking this chapter in just before midnight lol. You may or may not be aware, but my (ugrad) degree is in aerospace engineering. In theory, I know all about this. In practice I've forgotten basically everything I've learned since I graduated in 2016. I work as an engineer now but not in the aero field, so this information is not really fresh in my brain. If this was a story where Sylva needed to do some really complicated CAD design to save her life, well... that would be a way more boring story haha. Anyway, if you see any major, glaring inaccuracies, you can 100% chalk that up to me being really bad at engineering :p Anyway, there's a little bit of growth in this chapter when it comes to Sylva taking responsibility for things, even if her self esteem is still terrible, and she's like super obtuse when it comes to figuring out what's going on. Probably watching Sylva struggle to deal with the power is getting old, but it's not like she's going to suddenly become good at it just because she has a goal. She struggles with it and is terrible at it, but she tries and sometimes that's enough. It's certainly better than nothing. And honestly, that's admirable, even if Sylva is also a Mess in almost every respect. Consider leaving me a comment or rating or whatever- they make me happy : ) Hope you all have a great weekend, and I'll see you on Monday. update 10/22/19 - added chapter title. very obvious dr strangelove reference, mainly because of this line She could move things in space. She had moved those missiles, after all. This was basically the same thing, right? Just because she was now planning to ride that missile down to the ground didn't mean that it wasn't the same movements. which . well. you've seen dr. strangelove, right? I also thought about calling it "Strategic Crash Into the Water" but this is slightly funnier imoMon, 04 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-075/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-075/come away, o human child, to the waters and the wild, with a fairy hand in hand, for the world's more full of weeping than you can understand [ https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/stolen-child ] and finally, finally, two of our main threads are back in the same star system : ) we're creeping closer and closer, crawling our way towards the end of act 2. (for the record, this act probably won't end until ch90ish? but we're getting there...) Sylva doesn't actually know about anything outside the Empire yet. Iri does, but she's been tight lipped thus far. She maybe should have put 2 and 2 together from the weird situation with the pirates, plus the strange way her mentor acted when she left, plus Iri sorta dropping hints, but it's so outside the realm of anything that she could have imagined that you can't really fault her for not having a clue. It's like if I turned around and told you that the US government has been waging a secret war on dragon people in our sewers for the past 100 years, and the dragon people recently took prisoner, uh, a princess. Granted, it's far easier to keep a war secret if it's being fought lightyears away, with tightly restricted access to information (all ansible traffic is tightly controlled), and [redacted]. Please consider leaving me a comment and/or rating. They really brighten my day : ) Hope you all have a fantastic week. I'll see you on Friday!Fri, 01 Mar 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-074/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-074/\*gets taken over by a hive mind, but, like, lovingly\* There's a lot to say about this chapter. Here are some rapid fire thoughts. You know how you can be both terrified of something and absolutely obsessed with it at the same time? That's me with the idea of joining cults. And I'll be honest with you, if someone told me "give up your free will, but you'd be loved/cared for/understood, for real for real, not just as a platitude" I might do it. Isn't that what the concept of heaven is, a little bit (ie a place without sin, thus without meaningful choice, but it's also a paradise). I read this post one time that was like "can you leave heaven? if not, how is it different from a prison". I'm paraphrasing here but that's the jist, and that's what the Mother is. Also explicitly a Mother and not a queen because ItSoH is (at least a little bit) a story about complicated emotions about family. Besides, I think the whole bee trope is overdone, so you get a school of fish instead. Also: compare and contrast with the Emperor, in many ways. I'm straight up stealing from Ann Leckie at this point, anyway go read Ancillary Justice if you haven't already. It's fantastic. I always say I'm not the happiest with my banner images, but I never go back and change them, so my school of fish can stay lol. Please consider leaving a review or comment, I appreciate it more than you could ever know. Hope you have a great weekend. I'll see you on monday! update 10/20/19 - added chapter title. I can't believe how long ago this song [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apsP1spnpPE ] came out lmaoMon, 25 Feb 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-073/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-073/Well, my friends, the unthinkable has happened: I've run out of backlog chapters. February has been a rough writing month for me thus far, and so to get myself "in the mood" I've been writing random stuff that happens later, instead of the things that need to happen chronologically. This is not fantastic when you post chapters on a regular basis :p Don't worry, I'm not going to stop posting, I just need to get my ass back into gear. Unfortunately, it looks like February is going to be the first month since idk last October when I haven't written 50k words. RIP my writing streak I guess. Anyway, it took me idk half a year to get to this point (I started posting ItSoH in August iirc?) so I guess I'm not doing /too/ bad. As for what's going on on the Bellringer, Iri and everyone else are kinda freaking out over nothing. The shuttle reported back that there hadn't been a ship docked when they left, so if we think about the chance that a motivated ship jumped in while the shuttle was en route to the Bellringer, it would still take that new ship some time for their own jump to reset. So between the Vanquished shuttles taking time to send news back to the station, the actual possibility of there being a ship there, and the time it would take for that ship to be able to jump, the Bellringer actually made a fine choice. But for most of the crew (and Iri), it's a 'once burned twice shy' type situation- making a comittment action with their stardrive got a major portion of their crew killed, so it's not surprising that everyone is on edge about it. Anyway, if you'd like to motivate me- please consider leaving me a review, or honestly even just a chatty comment. I thrive on attention haha. Hope you all have a good week. I'll see you on Friday!Fri, 22 Feb 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-072/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-072/69. Nice. For a year, I had an absolutely hellish apartment whose address was 69 13th st. Truly a cursed combination of numbers, and that's all I can think about now when I think about 69 lmao. Anyway, this chapter and the next reason for some reason took me absolutely forever to write. I don't know why I had so much trouble with them. They're not significantly longer than the average chapter, and I enjoy writing Sylva and Iri. But I think I definitely enjoy writing people having heartfelt conversations more than I like writing people sneaking around doing crimes or whatever. I should be a playwright b/c then all I will have to do is write conversations. But alas, I'm an engineer instead. :p One of the most fun things when writing this story, b/c of the kinda complicated web of character dynamics, is to decide what's going to be said and what's not going to be said. The way that Iri talks about Halen with Sylva is completely different than the way she talks about him with Yan, and because neither of them are PoV characters, I don't think we've ever even seen them together, but you can get a pretty good sense of the type of relationship that they have. Please consider leaving me a review <3 Hope you all had a great week. I'll see you on monday!Mon, 18 Feb 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-071/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-071/Oh you thought in a book about religion where various ppl have magic powers and water is a symbolic element you weren't going to have somebody walk on water [ https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+14%3A22-33&version=NIV ]? The amount of time I spend thinking about that bible story is too much tbh. Years ago, for an art class, I did a bunch of drawings titled 'Can't Learn How to Behave' and it was a series of pictures that was all about, like, bible stories in which I refused to take the lesson to heart. The one I did with this particular story was the best of the bunch I think [ https://66.media.tumblr.com/0f26e84c41241d84f1631dc1f88c80e4/tumblr\_o7bp1o8ZMW1qdzjqso3\_1280.jpg ], but I also had like Eve in the garden, Abraham attempting to sacrifice Isaac, and Lot's wife turning into a pillar of salt. I like to believe my art's gotten a bit better since then. Anyway that's just a random factoid about me that has no bearing on this story lol. I just like to ramble in these authors notes for no reason haha. Anyway, the mystery of this planet deepens slightly. I don't know if anyone even remembers back to the Green King when he was talking about having his own chip, but there's a force on this planet that's after sensitives, and Yan is just going towards it. Her schtick has always been that she's desperate to find a place where she belongs and people understand her, and she's been into joining up with the group mind since the very beginning chapters (like literally ch1), and she'll jump at the chance to join her mind with anybody for even trivial reasons. It isn't out of character for her at all, but it is a little like... Yan.... baby....... no............ But I think all the pieces are basically in place. You can see how the rest of this is going to play out. I'm like chomping at the bit to finish this story arc tbh. I'm just the type of person who's always ready to move on to the next thing haha. I was this way around the beginning of act 1 as well. Please consider leaving me a review, I really appreciate them. I have the day off which is why this chapter is being posted in the middle of the day instead of late at night. Hope you had a great weekend, and I'll see you on Friday!Fri, 15 Feb 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-070/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-070/Somehow I managed to screw up my chapter divisions- this was supposed to be monday's chapter, but I managed to rearrange it? It's so hard to keep track of such things :p Yan's finally got that damn chip out. For better or for ill : ) Unless I change it, monday's chapter will be a Yan chap too, so you'll get to see some of the fallout from this. Anyway, I think it's kinda fun to see hints of Etta's backstory, even without ever getting to talk to her. She and her mother are cashing in on knowing people, and getting favors, even if helping Yan is a risky as hell move. After all, Yan is nearly next in line to lead the Empire that wants to wipe out everyone on this planet :3c I was thinking about this the other day. My favorite book (obviously) is Les Miserables by Victor Hugo. You may have heard the musical or seen the movie at some point in your life. Etta here is in the position of the bishop, who saves Valjean and offers him kindness even when he had just stolen from him. I mean, here Etta rescued Yan even though Yan held her at gunpoint and such, but it's the same deal. Just took about 1400 pages to get here when the same thing happened within the first idk 100 pages of Les Mis. It remains to be seen what the second major turn in Valjean's character arc equates to for Yan. :^) I supose this digression is completely opaque to anyone who hasn't read Les Miserables. Go read Les Miserables. it's good. And only a tiny bit longer than ItSoH is haha Please consider leaving me a review! They really really help. Hope you all have a great weekend, and I'll see you on Monday.Mon, 11 Feb 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-069/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-069/I wrote a good portion of this chapter while /literally/ drifting in and out of consciousness, so here, have the most nonsensical line I've ever written. [this is from when Sid and Cesper are talking on the bridge] "Unless there's a set of identical…" Sid searched for the word for twelve, and couldn't find it. "Unless there's a whole set of invisible ones, the more you rely on them to sit on your desk and not steer you wrong." And then I went into a tailspin about a trinket in the shape of a cat that Cesper keeps on his nightstand as a lucky charm. Believe me when I say this makes no sense in context either. I mean, on the plus side, even when I'm spouting complete garbage, my punctuation is still okay. We can all be glad of that haha. Sid is not a good letter writer haha. He's, I would say, barely coherent. It comes from the same place as his "I'm just going to close my eyes and say whatever I want and there can be no consequences because I can't get any response" thing that he does. Letters take time to be read and responded to, so by time the consequence gets back to him, it feels divorced from his original word vomit. Anyway. When Sid says "I know what my weaknesses are" that's Song Lyrics About Being In Love or Whatever . [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJKU\_H3asqk ] Please consider leaving me a rating and/or review. I super appreciate all the feedback you guys give me. Hope you all have a fantastic week; I'll see you on friday! update 10/15/19 - added chapter title. we're really scraping the bottom of the barrel on this oneFri, 08 Feb 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-068/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-068/Unfortunately for Sylva and Keep, sometimes people exit our lives without saying goodbye in way that will leave us with fond memories of them. Sylva... could have handled this better. And if you were thinking that the pirate thing was never going to come up again, well... I honestly try not to drop stuff like that. I feel like 'main character kills 30+ strangers' is like a big thing to happen, and I think that the consequences of it, 'realistically', are pretty wide ranging. We saw some of the /personal/ consequences, and some of the guild consequences, but the pirates were also a pretty big party who never got to have their say. And now they shall, at least a little bit. I've revamped my story description and (obviously) cover. Let me know what you think! I like to switch things up every once in a while. If you want to take a trip down memory lane, here is the new cover, and here are the two old ones [1] [2, illustration by @bonepocket on tumblr]. I like the new image, I think it's bold and graphic and has #symbolism. Or what passes for symbolism around here haha. Otoh, I do still love that illustration of Yan. She looks so pensive. Please consider leaving me a review or rating, they help immensely. Hope you've all had a great week. I'll see you on monday. update 10/14/19 - added title. it's mountain goats lyrics [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Za53rmpmi1Q ], what else did you really expect?Mon, 04 Feb 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-067/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-067/Somebody asked me like a billion years ago if Sid gets to have a love interest. I'm just chucking love interests into the wind like-- you get a love interest, you get a love interest, everybody gets a love interest! :p That's not really true. This isn't precisely a romance focused story, it's just like, since romance is a thing that people do, and this is foremost a story about people, it's kinda ineviatable. Anyway if you actually want good romance content, p l e a s e go watch God's Own Country on netflix it's so so so good. That's my media recommendation du jour. Want to know which character you're most like? Go take this quiz that I made! [ http://bit.ly/itsohcharquiz ] It's a mix of deep and frivolous questions. I make no claim to being a great personality quiz creator, I just thought it was fun haha. Unfortunately there isn't a way for me to 'weight' the questions afaik, so the frivolous ones may throw off the results haha. But I also didn't want to make a quiz that asks a variation on the same question over and over just for consistency's sake. But yeah. Share who you got in the comments! I'm curious :0 [2021 noodle note: i think i made the quiz kinda badly b/c everybody gets Yan basically. but it's fun to take anyway lol] Please consider leaving me a rating/review if you haven't yet! I thrive on feedback. Hope you all had a great weekend. I'll see you on Friday!Sat, 02 Feb 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-066/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-066/You may think to yourself 'clearly the author of this story has no self control whatsoever' and you would be /mostly/ correct, but I do have enough self control not to write a conlang. So this is mostly made up random sounds, in roughly verb-object-subject order, with minor bits of pronouns and verb conjugations for funsies. I promise I will not conlang on you for real. Too much effort, almost zero payoff. I'm thinking that I am going to stop 3 ch/week posting and return to monday + friday only. It's more difficult than I would like, plus I got a new job and moved houses halfway through january (yay for not being unemployed anymore, sad for not having infinite free time and a malleable sleep schedule that allowed me to write unimpeded). That's not to say that I'm in any danger of stopping posting, my backlog is just shrinking and it makes me nervous lol. I like to keep it around 10 chapters of backlog, but it's shrunk down to...5. Yikes. I like posting chapters as often as possible (gotta get that validation etc) but if it's not sustainable it's not sustainable. It was a fun experiment while it lasted, and maybe I'll go back to it someday. Please consider leaving me a rating and/or review c: Hope you all have an excellent weekend. I'll see you on monday.Wed, 30 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-065/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-065/The sheer number of c-section videos I watched in preparation to write this chapter is, uh, too many. Anyway, I do feel like for something that common, where the baby's life is only actually in danger if labor proceeds normally, and where there is a set of instructions that can be followed to do this procedure, I think the chances of success are pretty high. I tried to pick some situation that was difficult, but not impossible. When I was originally planning this whole adventure/side arc, I contemplated other medical situations that could arise (injury requiring amputation was the oother last contender), but I liked the idea of 'there is a reason this ship desperately needs a doctor' + a chance to get to know some minor characters aboard this ship. Having a single, one off incident wouldn't be as good for building of tension to the ineviatable, or forming a relationship with the character in question. This chapter is like. Absurdly long. For no good reason, really. I need to get better self editing skills, I think haha. Please consider leaving me a rating and/or review. It will make all my watching of 'how to do an ultrasound' tutorial videos worth it. :p See you on Friday. update 10/11/19 - added title. there are... several... mountain goats songs about giving birth/babies (genesis 30:3, animal mask, pink and blue, etc, etc, etc) but I picked San Bernadino [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34Wq96b22FI ] because it's one of my best friend (lydia)'s favorite songs. anyway. it's me birthday today. (the me of editing this chapter to add the title)Mon, 28 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-064/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-064/See, Yan isn't the only one who gets to have wild adventures. Sid gets to live dangerously too. I tried to make the symptoms of vacuum exposure as real as possible, but some artistic license is bound to be taken, mainly in the amount of thinking that someone under that kind of extreme duress would be able to do. But that's how writing works, isn't it? Anyway you literally can't write a science fiction story involving space ships without at least one scene of vacuum danger. It's against the rules :p Please consider leaving me a rating and/or review <3 Hope you all had a great weekend. I'll see you on Wednesday!Fri, 25 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-063/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-063/Sid trying to prove that he won't let Kino overshadow him? Hard to tell if that's growth from him realizing he needs to be a leader, or him just refusing to accept Kino as an equal (or better). It's a mix of both, though, really. Please consider leaving me a rating and/or a review- they make me happy :p Hope you all are having an excellent week. I'll see you on Friday!Wed, 23 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-062/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-062/One comment I've gotten over and over from people in the early chapters of this story (by early I mean the part when Yan and Sylva visit Yan's family aboard the Iron Dreams) is that spacer ships being inhabited by weird family dynasties seems a little incest-y. It was never the intention to have people assume that. Anyway that's (hopefully) cleared up here haha. Iri is, was, and always shall be completely incorrigible. Sylva is, was, and always shall be prone to jumping into action whenever something is going 'wrong', no matter how little sense it makes. Anyway I love writing about Iri, I just think she's hilarious in every respect. While Sylva is stuck in her little doctor's office checking out people's weird rashes, Iri gets to be a real part of the crew and flirt nonstop with Sign. Unfortunately/fortunately she isn't a PoV character so we don't get to witness any of that haha. Please consider leaving me a review and/or a rating : ) Hope you all had a great weekend, I'll see you on wednesday! update 10/7/19 - added title. if you look up the song [the keeper / a keeper did a'hunting go], you'll see it described as "A traditional English song about a gamekeeper chasing and catching deer, maybe a tad euphemistic…". i figured it was appropriate, considering this chapter has the only vaguely sexual scene in the story hahaMon, 21 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-061/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-061/As promised, a Yan chapter to end out the week. This chapter was originally ch59, but I rearranged it so there would be more of a steady trickle of them. Unfortunately that means the timeline is confusing, but just chalk that up to Yan having no clue how time is passing. Sorry to all of you who thought that Yan was on the Guild ship- she's not haha. I didn't even intend for anyone to think that. The Guild plotline and this plotline are almost totally divorced from one another, aside from the vaguest of connecting threads. There were some hints about where Yan was being kept in ch51, when she describes her cell. She speculates that she's on a planet because of the building materials and the increased gravity. At least you can rest easy knowing that Aymon hasn't accidentally ordered Sid out on a mission that could lead to him killing Yan through ignorance haha. Anyway, I'd better keep my mouth firmly shut on everything here. As you may or may not know, I love to just tell people information. And sometimes it's better if I DON'T do that. Please consider leaving me a review and/or rating- I really appreciate them. Hope you all have a fabulous weekend, and I'll see you on Monday. edit 5/26/19 - added chapter title, fixed formatting. Title is a reference to the grey king and the silver flame attunement [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rYgTkl1JOO0 ]. Yan is hardcore, but perhaps not that hardcore.Fri, 18 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-060/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-060/If the fact that half of my chapters have been bloating to absurd lengths annoys you, I'm sorry. In fact, no one is sorrier than I am, because a 10k word chapter releases on the same schedule as a 5k word chapter, but one of them takes me ~6 days to write and the other only takes me ~3 lmao. Anyway, I suppose you all should know that I have mapped out to the chapter level all the way to the end of Act 2, which, barring chapters that balloon out of their expected length, should end around ch91. I have a headache and thus not much to say right now. I'll see you on Friday! Please consider leaving me a review and/or rating, they help a lot : )Wed, 16 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-059/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-059/What's the Guild up to? Stupidity, that's what. Though there's still /technically/ a mystery as to what the motive to murder Vaneik is, I feel like it's a fairly easy guess at this point. Yuuni is fun to write. Even though Aymon keeps comparing her to Yan just because they're young spacer sensitives, she's like the complete opposite of Yan in almost every aspect. I mean, if there's three adjectives I wouldn't use to describe Yan, they would be bubbly, easily angered, and scheming- Yuuni Olms is all of those. I just realized both their names start with Y >.> I have a real problem with naming characters the same letter. Someday maybe Sid, Sylva, and Sandreas are all going to be in the same scene and it will be chaotic. (I should have put another S word at the end of that sentence. there's a lot of sibilance :p ) The epigraph is loosely inspired in phrasing by the classic bible verse 'though I walk through the valley of death' etc. I try not to outright reference bible shit tooooooo often b/c I know it gets annoying, but I wanted something that was thematically connected to the concept of being like. watched all the time as Aymon tries to watch the Guild. If you expected a conclusion to the Red King storyline, well, sorry :^) Please consider leaving me a review or rating, they help me know what you like and dislike in this story. I'll see you on Wednesday!Mon, 14 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-058/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-058/It's a rare chapter of mine that has 3 whole scenes in it, rather than one scene that goes on for like, 6000 words or something ridiculous like that >.> Jalena's worried that Sylva is about to go killing pirates through intentional medical malpractice, but let's be real, the level of competency that would take is beyond what Sylva has. Besides, Sylva is a very 'true neutral' type character- she really only cares about her own personal goals and circle of friends. Maybe she verges ever so slightly into the chaotic side of things. She doesn't have the grudge against pirates that real spacers have, and she also doesn't have the ethical framework that real doctors (should, theoretically) have. Anyway, I'm sure you can see exactly where this slow trainwreck is heading. Someone told me pregnancy isn't dramatic enough, but I didn't want to feel like I was pulling a problem out of thin air. Pretty much half the population goes through it at some point or another, so it's fairly realistic for this to be the first problem that she needs to solve. FYI, I'm starting a new job on Monday, so expect chapters from here on out to be posted later in the day instead of at random times. Hopefully it won't impact my writing schedule too much, but it remains to be seen. My commute is going to be absolutely disgusting until I find an apartment closer to work (it's literally on the other side of my state) but it's been struggle city trying to find a place that is a) affordable b) the right size c) close to my actual job d) not horrible/run down, etc etc. Now I'm just whining :p Anyway right now I'm feeling a little bit of this song [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8IGVxBb5uYk ], but after a week I bet I'll be feeling more like this [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rsDkmVo2fg4 ]. (What, you didn't think you could get away with me not linking music in my author note, even when it has zero to do with the actual chapter, did you?) Please consider leaving a rating and/or review if you haven't done so yet. It really helps out : )Fri, 11 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-057/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-057/The very observant among you may recognize that you've seen the song title in the epigraph before- I also made up some lyrics for that particular song way, way back in chapter 16. Sing to the tune of 'my darlin clementine' [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twRr3ygK3TM ](I don't /love/ the linked cover, but I couldn't find a particularly better one). Intentional parallels to Halen's backstory abound. Make what you will of that. For an interesting and grim philisophical look at the implications of solitary confinement, I recommend this philosophy tube video [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-ZfPYRkEGk ]. The refrain of "I don't want to die in here" and all its variations are lifted directly from Heel Turn 2 by the Mountain Goats [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6MtnwN32ioo ]. Act 2 is obviously a turning point in Yan's character arc. There are many things that I want to say, but I will endeavor to keep my mouth firmly shut on all such matters :p Gotta say that these Yan chapters are emotionally taxing to write, and probably to read as well. Sorry? IDK how you all feel about them. Please consider leaving a rating and/or review if you haven't already, they help a lot.Wed, 09 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-056/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-056/Sylva teaming up with someone actually competent? Amazing. Sylva digging a far deeper hole for herself by pretending to be something she's not qualified for at all? Horrible. We also get a fun little bit of backstory for a certain character. It's blink and you miss it, but it's in there :^) If you remember way way way back at the beginning of the story, like 30 chapters ago, you'll remember Kino asks about someone's name. We finally get that answer here. I think I've figured out what I'm going to do about the Yan/pacing situation. As a trial period, I'm going to try to increase my posting schedule to 3x/week (monday, wednesday, friday), and one of those chapters should always be a Yan chapter. That will continue until I either burn out and decide that this is too fast of a writing pace ( >.> ), or until the main cast is back together again. This may necessitate me changing around some of the details of what I had planned for this act, but yk, part of writing a web serial is flexibility, so yeah. I did add the traumatizing content tag, and I went back and added spoiler boxes to the content warnings at the beginning of chapters as requested. Thanks for all your input. Please consider leaving a rating or review if you haven't already- they help a lot (and I want to stay on trending for as long as possible haha). See you on wednesday, I guess :0 update 10/1/19 - added chapter title. btw, you should go watch no evil [ https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL\_9VobYoMHhBjLjSxq5vzNW\_9b00VUxiE ] on youtube. it's goodMon, 07 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-055/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-055/I know you're all super glad to have a Yan chapter again. I'm sorry for making you all hang on for so long without one. I'm kinda reconsidering how many Yan vs not-Yan chapters there should be, because I know most of you like her a lot. Which on one hand is good b/c it means I was doing my job as a writer, but on the other hand, right now she's trapped and imprisoned, which doesn't make for thrilling storytelling if we had just a bunch of chapters from her perspective. I'm trying to keep the flow of time sort of consistent, and there are a lot of things happening in other places in the story universe, so it is somewhat necessary to spend time on them >.> I might consider rearranging the chapters to give more Yan chapters in between other people's, but I'm not sure what that would do to the plot/pacing. It's tough. Something I've been thinking about anyway. Another thing I've been thinking about is if this story needs the traumatizing content tag. This chapter and a couple other upcoming ones might warrant it. Let me know what your thoughts are on that. You don't know how hard it was to resist just wholesale putting this song [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLg-v4CS4nQ ] as the epigraph to this chapter haha. But that would break the rules of my universe so alas. You get a made up song instead. Please consider leaving a rating or review if you haven't already- they help a lot. Hope you have all had a great week. I'll see you on monday update 9/30/19 - fixed a minor error. added chapter title. was tempted to name this chapter 'light as a feather, stiff as a board', but it didn't quite fitFri, 04 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-054/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-054/Well, we've come to the end of these bonus chapters. I've really enjoyed writing them. Tbh I wish I could post everyday all the time, but it's just not realistic lol. Since my usual writing rate is ~2 chapters/week then my posting rate must, unfortunately, stay the same. I hope you've enjoyed this little look into pieces of Kino's past. Obviously I can't get into everything, but getting to look into her mind and personal situation has been interesting, at the very least :p I'll see you tomorrow for our normal real friday chapter! If you're enjoying the story, please consider leaving a rating and/or review- it helps a lot. Thank you <3Thu, 03 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-053/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-053/You may not know this, but I was a teacher for two years. It all took place under of very strange extenuating circumstances (ie not through Teach for America or anything like that). My B.S. is in engineering, not in teaching, so I was a very untrained, unqualified person, but I taught 6th grade science and 9th grade algebra. Anyway, because of this life experience that I had, I have a lot of thoughts about schools and the people in them. We should all be thankful that this is not a story that takes place at the Academy, and nobody is in school anymore :p I also did take this bonus chapter as an opportunity to self indulgently describe a propaganda film shot-by-shot for ~1000 words. Sorry lol. If you haven't given the story a rating or review yet, I'd love it if you did so. Thanks a billion! Hope you are all having a fantastic day, and I'll see you all tomorrow. c:Wed, 02 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/numberless-army-of-cephalophores/sudden-oak-death/https://nparis.co/works/numberless-army-of-cephalophores/sudden-oak-death/Teenagers genetically modified to receive all their nutrition from the sun still crave food.Tue, 01 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-052/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-052/So this is bonus chapter part 1/3. Thank you all so much for following along as I've hit a variety of milestones: 50 chapters, 1000 pages, a whole year of writing ItSoH (I started in january of 2018), a whole bunch of new followers since I got on trending, etc. Your support and engagement with this story really means more to me than I can ever express. As for this bonus chapter itself, it's Kino time! Most of the information in here is stuff that could (maybe?) be inferred from previous chapters (I hint at a lot of what happened on Falmar when Aymon and Kino visit Tyx III, and I talk obliquely about Kino's childhood when she and Yan have their first real conversation). Anyway, that is to say that there's not a lot of /new/ information here, just a slightly more personal perspective on it. I'm not sure if I love the header banner I drew for Kino. It doesn't /quite/ match with the others in terms of aesthetics, so I might change it. Though I've been thinking that to myself about Sid's questionable cat banner, so w h o k n o w s if I'll work up the motivation to fix it :p See you tomorrow for part 2!Tue, 01 Jan 2019 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-051/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-051/Everyone (rightfully) thinks Sylva's (barely thought out) plan is completely dumb and incomprehensible, but they're going along with it for three reasons: she's unstoppable, it doesn't cost them anything, and they all are holding on to a tiny hope that she might succeed, against all odds. Unfortunately, we don't have infinite time to dive deep into the family problems aboard the Iron Dreams, but there are many. Suffice to say, Maxes does not do the most fantastic job as father because he makes bad life choices. He tries and fails. The tensions are just brought to the surface because of how he's behaving since Yan disappeared. Anyway, yes, Sylva and Iri are going to team up. Will this turn out well? Who knows :^) So this week, the bonus chapter is being split into 3 pieces, so you'll get a new update every weekday (how thrilling). think of this as the 50th chapter celebration, a new years celebration, the 1000 pages celebration, whatever :p lots of things to celebrate. Hope you are all having a fantastic new year's eve/new year. We'll take a cup of kindness yet for auld lang syneMon, 31 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-050/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-050/Sid needs to learn to be a leader, and that means partially learning when to pick his battles against Sandreas. This one is not one that he will win. In the future he'll be a bit more judicious. Is it clear atm how all the various puzzle pieces of what people are doing will come together? All the major players have their own things to juggle, but there are, as always, ties that bind :p As always, I wish I could just blast out everything in one giant update so I could tell you what's happening in ~~the future~~ but my backlog has already shrivled a little over the past few weeks so that's not good. I've just been slightly less productive lately + I spent a long time writing the bonus chapter. My usual backlog is ~14 chapters, and right now I'm working on ch60, so that's no good lol. It shrunk by a whole 2 weeks of posting! Anyway, I hope you all had a great week, and I'll see you on monday. Please consider leaving me a rating or review if you haven't already <3Fri, 28 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-049/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-049/Hope you all had a great weekend, and that you have a great upcoming week. We've finally reached the end of all the Aymon chapters (aren't you excited lol). His little subplot has come to its dramatic conclusion, and we'll be back with Sid in a hot minute. Things are getting a little spicy, aren't they :p That's Act II for you babie. I'll leave the poll up in ch46 until the end of the day today (so if you haven't voted in it then go ahead and do so now), but it's looking like the bonus chapter is going to be a bit about Kino. Be prepared for that to ask more questions than it answers, because a lot about Kino will be revealed in due time in the natural course of the story Wink [Is it spoilers to say something like that?] Just as a refresher, here's what you know about Kino. She's from Falmar, which was a young colony that was overrun by plague. Kino was clearly traumatized by whatever happened on Falmar. The survivors of the colony were taken off the planet by the Guild, against the explicit wishes of the Empire, and many of them were brought to Hanathue, where Kino spent part of her childhood. People on Hanathue were not happy about recieving refugees. The Fleet had something to do with Falmar in the past. Kino is weird and quiet, but has a lot of personal problems, including drug addiction. She has connections on Emerri to people who sell Vena. Kino's affinity within the power is to be able to hide herself completely or almost completely, to the point where when she was tested as a sensitive as a child, the test turned out negative, and she had to prove her sensitivity in some other way. She also has a tendency to vanish from under her watchers' noses. I /think/ that's everything you know about Kino at the moment? Anyway, the bonus chapter will probably be ~12k words and be split into 3 pieces. It looks like chapter 50 is going up on dec 31, so expect the bonus chapter to be released in pieces on jan 1, 2, and 3. Part 1 will be about Kino on Falmar, part 2 will be about Hanathue, and part 3 will be about the Academy.Mon, 24 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-048/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-048/Guild politics, guild politics, is everything in the world guild politics? I'll admit that the allegorical nature of the Red King story has gotten fairly convoluted. Nothing in life maps 1:1 with stories, and thus my little story within a story does not map direcltly on to the events as they shall unfold. But You Know. This chapter and the next were originally together, and tbh I'm kinda regretting splitting them, but they were two long as a whole thing. If you haven't yet, please go back to the previous chapter and vote on what the bonus chapter should be about : ) it's a 50 chapters celebration lol. Hope you're all having a good week. You will see me again on monday even though that will be crisp moose eve. ItSoH stops for no holiday :pFri, 21 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-047/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-047/First of all, welcome to all my new followers who have come over from seeing me on trending! It's great to have you here! Second order of business, we're rapidly approaching the 50th chapter (and I crossed the 50 follower milestone), so I figured why not have a bonus chapter. There's a poll up for what you want the bonus chapter to be about, but if you have other suggestions, feel free to leave them in the comments. I'll pick whatever has the most votes. This chapter won't be replacing a regular chapter- those will still be on the normal monday/friday schedule, but it will be an extra chapter at some point during the week. I'm going to consider the bonus chapter (whatever you pick for it to be about) as "semi-canonical" in that I am saying these events happened but by all accounts they don't actually belong in the story. Anyway, that poll will be up probably until next monday? So that I have time to work on the actual chapter (before ch50 gets posted). So get your votes and comments in while they're hot :^) For some of the options that are less specific, please elaborate on your suggestion/vote in the comments. I didn't want to clog up the poll with too many options. You have two votes, so feel free to vote for your first and second choice. Idk if anyone actually pays attention to the little mini narrative up in the epigraphs at the beginnings of the chapters (hint: you should, because some of the time they're not random lmao), but here's Absalom [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQBNDnrS8HY ] And thank you all again for sticking with me, and somehow getting me on trending! I really appreciate all your support <3Mon, 17 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-046/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-046/I guess I should warn you that we've just entered into a fairly long series of Aymon chapters. Because I try to keep things (relatively) chronological, his subplot with the Guild needs to halt before we can zoom around to see other people again. So 46, 47, and 48 are all Aymon chapters. It was originally going to be fewer, but they were getting so long that I had to split them up into pieces. It's a little bit painful to watch Aymon have a friendly conversation with Yan's family when none of them have any idea what's happened. Lil bit of dramatic irony there for you, if that counts. I mean is it dramatic irony any time the reader knows something the chars don't? It's a mystery. You can tell exactly when I took my last english literature class (11th grade in 2011 lol). As for the epigraph at the beginning of the chapter, there's a long history (in our world) of the concept of "three refusals". Here's two random examples. in the beginning Julius Caesar (shakespeare play, I mean) Caesar refuses the crown three times. In the bible, Peter denies Jesus three times. You see this rule of threes over and over, so I stick it in sometimes lol. As for the gates in all the cardinal directions, I'm mostly thinking about "Twelve Gates to the City"(a gospel song) [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHg9qbF-6yc ]. I'm linking this version because of clarity of lyrics, but many of the upbeat gospel versions are more fun lol. Anyway, hope you all had a good week. I'll see you on mondayyyyyyyyyyyy : )Fri, 14 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-045/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-045/And Sylva comes back into the story. I know some people really don't like her, which is unfortunate lol, but she's here for the long haul. And she's here to make many, many, many stupid decisions, starting right about now. There was a reason I introduced her with such focus for the first 10 or so chapters. While I admit that this story does have some structural flaws, I do at least know what my plan is, and I knew it even way back then that Sylva was going to be a main character. Maybe I should have made it so she was like in the story the whole time, but I didn't want my character soup to get too messy. Anyway, so she's going to team up with various people to do some fun and wacky plots, which you can all look forward to with bated breath. As far as her new little banner- she's got a parrot : ) because she does languages, geddit? I was originally going to make her have a snake, for a different reason that you may be able to connect the dots with in a few chapters, but I decided a) snakes would be harder to make work compositionally b) it didn't really relate to her personality super much c) bird has an interesting symbolic interplay with the other character banners that snakes don't. anyway go ahead and think about that one if you wish :^) There's an outside possibility that I will have more PoVs in act 3 (jeeze that's a long way away and I don't want to think about it), but 4 is the number we're sticking with for now, so no more new banners. Anyway, hope you all had a good weekend, and I'll see you on Friday!Mon, 10 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-044/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-044/Welcome to Part Two: The Realms of the Unreal! And a new part of the story means some new PoVs : ) Which means new PoV banners, so Sid gets to be cats. You'll notice that their eyes are blue- that's because white cats with blue eyes are often deaf. When/if I prepare this for print I'll have to greyscale it, but fornow they get to be blue lol. I don't love the way I drew them and maybe someday I'll go back and fix it, but I'm kinda bad at drawing animals lol, so I don't know if it will improve any. Also I just think that cats fit his personality? Maybe that's just me lol. Yan's fish is #symbolic at least- hopefully if you go back through you'll notice a reoccuring theme of like water metaphors/similies/mentions. Anyway ennough about Yan, she's not even in this chapter lol. And ahhhh I'm so glad to finally get to post what's going on with the Emperor lmao. I deliberately wanted it to be sorta like the opposite of like, you know that scene in the wizard of oz where dorothy and co go to see the wizard and there's the great and powerful oz, but then he's really just a dude behind a curtain? [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZR64EF3OpA ] Well there are just dudes behind the curtain, but it's also more creepy than Sid had previously imagined. Of course, Sid doesn't have the wizard of oz as a cultural touchstone lol, so he's just in there getting worked over by the Theatrics Of It All. My plan to create a guide to all the characters/chapters/etc of the first part is taking longer than anticipated, so that'll come out someday. >.> Don't hold your breath, but also don't be surprised if/when it pops up. This chapter is un-beta'd, so if you see any errors feel free to point them out in the comments. Also I'd appreciate it if everyone who's been following the story gives me a rating or a review, it would really help out (I want to get on trending lol). Have a great weekend, and I'll see you again on MondayFri, 07 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-043/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-043/Well, here we are at long last. Part One, New Creatures With New Hearts, is all over. It's been a long ride, and I'm so so so so so thankful to you all for sticking it out with me thus far. Anyone who reads this and especially anyone who leaves comments, just know that your support honestly means the world to me <3 I'm sorry for leaving you on a cliffhanger, but I'll be back on Friday with the beginning of Part Two, The Realms of the Unreal. For the curious, the name of part one is cribbed directly from the Mountain Goats "Song for Black Sabbath's Second North American Tour", and the name of part two is a reference to Henry Darger's outsider art work The Story of the Vivian Girls, in What Is Known as the Realms of the Unreal, of the Glandeco-Angelinian War Storm, Caused by the Child Slave Rebellion. I feel a certain companionship with outsider artists who are lonely and write thousands of pages of fantastical stories about religion, because, like, same. And the song lyrics at the beginning of this chapter are very very losely inspired by Harry Belafonte's Banana Boat Song (Day-O) . At some point this week I may put up a non-chapter that's basically a chapter summary / character list / relevant information type stuff. I'm still trying to figure out what would be useful to include in that, and if I should put it at the beginning or the end, or if it's worth doing at all. It might be useful for people to have a guide to look back on what happened in what chapter, if you (or, let's be real, I) want to remember when something happens/look something up. If you think that would be a good thing to include, or have suggestions, feel free to shout out in the comments. This is basically just a warning that there might be a midweek update that you may or may not care about lmao. Btw, if you don't remember who Genna is (or if you're new since I edited chapter one and you never met her), she's one of Yan's friends from school and a very minor character. It's just fun to have people who (used to) exist in chapter one come back at the very end of the arc. There used to be a conversation where she was introduced, but I have since deleted it in order to make my first few chapters more engaging. A lot of part 1 requires heavy editing, especially at the beginning, and I have vague plans to get to it some day, but I want to finish things first lol............. song for black sabbath's second north american tour lyrics Hang my hammer on a nail / Never see it again / Set sail for the cosmos / High above the world with its beaten-down men Not long for this world / Have to be reminded / To stay away from windows / Not to leave important things behind All gone / All gone / With the dawn And then I'm in an airplane heading west / Over the ocean / Unsteady on my feet again / A body in motion So far from the slaughterhouse / New creatures with new hearts / Landing at LaGuardia / Tearing up the charts All gone / All gone / With the dawn update 9/18/19- added chapter title. what shall we do with a drunken spacer? what shall we do with a drunken spacer? what shall we do with a drunken spacer, early in the morning? leave the reader on a cliffhanger. leave the reader on a cliffhanger. leave the reader on a cliffhanger for a good 8 chapters.Mon, 03 Dec 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-042/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-042/RIP Ungarti Vaneik, you will be dearly missed as the last bastion of sanity in the Guild. At its heart, the Guild is a squabbling, barely held together mess. We haven't seen a lot of that yet, but Guild politics become a biiiiit more of a thing in act 2, for obvious reasons. It feels like the whole cast just got back together and now they're going to be scattered to the four winds again. Guess that's how stories go, though. Please consider leaving a review or rating if you haven't already, it really helps. Hope everyone had a good week. I'll see you on Monday!Fri, 30 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-041/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-041/Well, forty chapters in and you finally get to meet the emperor. You didn't think Sandreas was the one in charge of the whole operation, did you? ;^) I've dropped minor mentions of the emperor throughout, but it hasn't really been relevant until now. I mean it doesn't really become relevant relevant until later, but you have to introduce most of the major components of your story within act 1, otherwise things end up looking like they came out of nowhere haha. So I'm just barely squeaking this one in. I'd super appreciate it if anyone who hasn't rated/reviewed yet this story gave it an honest rating/review <3 Hope you all had a good weekend! I'll see you on FridayMon, 26 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-040/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-040/Well, there's what's basically the mini-climax for act 1, it's all falling action and setup for act 2 from here on out : ) This chapter was hard to write lol. Although I think there definitely needed to be a big confrontation esque scene where everybody lets out their garbage emotions, it's very draining to write something like that haha. And I know that the rain might be making this too melodramatic, but my strategy for writing weather is mostly 'look out the window and use what it's doing right now', and when I wrote this chapter it was raining super hard. It's been a very rainy fall around here, with early snow. Anyway, a lot of this confrontation comes down to everybody (deliberately) misinterpreting everyone else. Kino saying that Aymon said Sid is going to be the next voice comes from the conversation that she had with Aymon about how Aymon and Sid are similar and have the same affinities for control, but he didn't ever say that he thought that Sid would be his successor. Kino is making inferences because she's angry. Sid is freaking out because he's a mess. Hope everyone who celebrates it had a good thanksgiving. I'll see you on monday! edit:// 12/9/18 - fixed character continuity error 9/15/19 - added chapter title. it's from Lorde's song Sober ii (Melodrama) All the glamour and the trauma and the fuckin' melodrama All the gun fights And the lime lights And the holy sick divine nightsFri, 23 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-039/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-039/You know how you can go through a shitty situation and keep working and working, and then all of a sudden it's over and you totally freak out? That's Sid rn. Well that and he ran out of drugs so like. That does suck. We are so close to the end of act 1 it's almost scary lol. Just four chapters to go. Here's a picture I've been working on recently [ https://66.media.tumblr.com/d06ba8e3aae465a0fe168e1e0dd32db9/tumblr\_pidldt09bT1qdzjqso1\_1280.png ]. I'm probably going to finish it tonight, or at least put some work into it some more. It probably woldn't make a very eye catching cover img, so I won't be changing it up I don't think. This is actually a straight up illustration of a scene that happens near the end of act 2. I haven't written it yet but I felt inspired to draw it lol. Is it a spoiler to say that? mayhaps. But there's very little information actually encoded in the image haha. Have fun speculating if speculation is your thing. Anyway, hope anyone in the US has a good thanksgiving, and everyone not in the US has an ordinary good week. : ) Still taking name suggestions for future characters, feel free to toss em in the comments.Mon, 19 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-038/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-038/And the gang's back together again! Mostly, anyway. We're winding down to the end of this arc; after this there's only 6 more chapters until we get to the dreaded act 2. I'm eager for you all to get there haha. Well, eager and nervous at the same time (but maybe that's the coffee I've been drinking). I love Halen tbh. He's like the voice of reason and calm most of the time. Originally when I started writing I intended for Yan and Aymon to be more similar to eachother, but as I developed everyone's characters, I began to realize that it would make more sense for Sid and Aymon to be a pair- they're both kinda massive drama queens, if in different ways. In some ways Yan and Aymon are still foils to eachother, but yeah. Part of this- not confusion but just growth- came out of originally I had wanted this story to be way more stupid and trite than it now is lol. Take a guess at what absolutely boneheaded plot twist I was originally planning if you want- I'm not going to tell you what it was unless you guess it correctly, but you should have plenty of hints lol. Thank goodness I'm able to change and adapt when I realize I'm about to commit various writing sins. The song at the beginning of the chapter is not-so-subtly-inspired by Stan Roger's song Lies. definitely not my favorite stan rogers song, but I figured that stealing from it was thematically appropriate lol. As always, you're welcome to leave name suggestions for new characters to appear in later chapters. Also this chapter is (once again) un-beta'd, so if you see any egregious errors please shout them out. On a slightly more obnoxious note, if you haven't rated or reviewed the story yet, I'd appreciate if you did. We're about 200k words into it at this point, so I think you can probably give a fair assesment haha. Hope you all have a great weekend- I'll see you on monday! edit 5/5/19 - added chapter title. continuation of chapter 16, reference to gordon lightfoot's song high and dryFri, 16 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-037/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-037/And now we get to meet Sid's family. As they say, "that boy needs therapy!". Though that could be said for literally most of the cast of this story for one reason or another. But I feel like Sid in particular has that middle child syndrome going on. He's scrawny compared to his older brother, and he's not the cute baby of the family like his sister is, and it doesn't help that he was taken away to go to school for most of the year, so it's a little awkward for him. Sid's family is pretty weird, but only seeing them through Yan's eyes it's really 🤔. pretty rude of Sid to drop by and bring a ton of guests uninvited lol. You're still welcome to leave name suggestions in the comments for future characters : ) Hope everyone's weekend has been well, and if you got today off from work/school you enjoyed it! See you on friday! update 9/12/19 - added title. that's a theme of this story, baby! anyway we're literally at Sid's home, that he feels completely disconnected from, trying to reclaim some sort of connection to the past lmao. anyway everyone is /trying/ to go back to a time when they felt at home but they can't! can't go back! never can go back! the past is a foreign country!Mon, 12 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-036/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-036/And we're finally, finally getting off of Olar! I'll be honest, some of this probably could have been cut, but like. Who doesn't want to read about Sid making bad life choices? (if you do like to watch Sid make bad life choices, hoo boy, have I got some upcoming chapters for you lmao). Anyway the red moon on the cover image is Olar's giant red moon, but like, artistic. You can imagine the moon looks however you want. But in case anyone was wondering wtf was going on with the cover image- that's what's up with it lol. It's 2am (it's TECHNICALLY friday) and my brain is kinda mush right now. I'm trying out the whole 'posting at different times of day to attract different readers' thing but idk how well that strat actually works. If anything it just leads to badly written authors notes. This chapter is un-beta'd, so if you see any massive errors, give me a shout out and I'll fix em. Anyway, hope your week has been good. See you on Monday for what may be one of the funnest chapters yet. You can probably figure out exactly where Yan and Sid are going to go and what they are going to do :p Hey, also, leave name suggestions in the comments and I might use them for characters. I'm going to need to name a whole new spate of characters coming up, so this'll be a good time to get in your name suggestions lol. People like suggesting names for things, right?Fri, 09 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-001/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-001/This chapter is a significant edit/rewrite of what was originally chapter 1+2. I have slimmed down both of those chapters to remove... unnecessary... material and to make the beginning of the story easier to read. I think that the old chapter 1 was kinda a turn off, and I'm hoping that this will be better. Major thanks to Unice who gave me tips on how to edit these chapters. Can't say that I followed all of the advice to the letter, but I tried lol. Also thanks to Lydia who was my original beta for this chapter. Anyway if you're new to this story, welcome! Glad to have you here!Tue, 06 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-035/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-035/Just as an fyi, I'm going to go through and edit a bunch of the early chapters, which will involve deleting some (rip chapters 1+2, a good 60% of your original content will be dearly missed). I'm going to be re-uploading the new chapters, so you'll probably get notifications for those- sorry if you don't care, but if you want to reread them then go ahead haha. It won't affect the plot in any way, it's just like. My early chapters are a mess b/c I wrote them before I knew how to write gud. So I'm cleaning them up/getting them to be at least a tad less tedious to slog through. Anyway, this is the last of Aymon we'll see for a while, until everyone gets back to Emerri together. His little travels had significantly less #drama than Yan and Sid's. I try to break things up so that there isn't too much of one POV at once [even though the story is primarily about Yan], but I conceptualize all of the different plot threads as happening in their own little spheres, so I never remember where they fit in the order. In other news: I'm "doing" nanowrimo, in that I'm continuing at my normal writing pace of ~60k words/mo. You probably won't see the chapters that I'm writing this month for another, uh, 2 months? I have a BIG buffer of chapters haha. There's a part of me that just wants to post them all at once because some wild stuff goes down and I'm excited for you to read it, but I also need my posting safety net haha. Anyway, how was your weekend? See you on Friday!Mon, 05 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-034/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-034/Anyone thinking back to chapter idk, 14? when they last met with the Guild? Yuuni Olms is very fun to write. She's like, sweet on top and steel in the middle. She's sympathetic to Yan b/c they've had similar upbringings- spacers pulled away from their family ship to attend the Academy, then thrust into power because of their apprenticeships. But you can see that the Guild is full of clashing personailities. Boy I sure hope THAT won't become a problem in the future :p I have a lot less to say in these authors notes since I batch edited all the chapters through the end of part 1, rather than editing them just before posting. Anyway this chapter has not been beta'd, so if you see any glaring errors, feel free to shout them out in the comments. Anyway, hope you all had a good week. I'll see you on monday!Fri, 02 Nov 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-033/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-033/Sid's most ardent desire is to make everything difficult for everyone, including himself, but that's why he's so fun. Next chapter we get to see Yan and Sid talk to the Guild, which I can garuntee will be 100% a great time for all involved :p I switched the cover image- let me know if you prefer this one or the old one (old image by @bonepocket on tumblr, current cover by me). Just figured it would be nice to change things up for a while lol. This chapter is un-beta'd, so if you see anything egregious please feel free to shout it out and I will make the necessary edits. See you on Friday! [honestly, I love posting chapters, I wish I could post more than twice a week lol, but I just don't write that fast]Mon, 29 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-032/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-032/A slightly more meditative chapter today, before we get into the more diplomatic stuff. Let me know how you're liking things so far. Don't have a ton to say in the authors notes today lol. See you on Monday. update 9/7/19 - added chapter title. it's a bit of a joke. the eyes of dr eckleburg are from the great gatsby, and in one of the most over discussed pieces of symbolism in every american high school literature class, they perhaps represent judgement cast by god upon The American Wasteland ™. anyway in this chapter we find Yan terrified of this giant red moon hovering in the sky over this desolate cityscape, which she prays in front of as though it were the eye of god looking down on her. that's it that's the joke Is it making my symbolism more clear by adding references to other symbolism that does the same thing? does it make life more confusing for everyone? is it silly and or stupid to be refferential to other works constantly? mayhaps I've just got the great gatsby on the brain recently b/c my younger sibling (a high school student) refused to read it when it was assigned and I've been incessantly mocking them for it since update 10/15/19 - added fake anime screenshot illustrationFri, 26 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-031/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-031/This chapter was a really rough one for me to write, and I don't think it turned out as well as it could have. When I was editing it to post I changed around a bunch of stuff to try to make it better, but I'm not entirely sure if I succeeded. Anyway, here's ya monday chapter. Let me know what you think, b/c I'm very open to restructuring this one. We'll be back to Yan and Sid on Friday, but Sandreas is out here mind controlling entire cities so we do need to check in on that occasionally :p Hope you all had a good weekend!Mon, 22 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-030/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-030/This chapter is a bit of a rough one. In case you're wondering, no, Yan and Sid are decidedly not okay. They will be eventually, but they're going through a pretty rough patch right now. For obvious reasons. I decided to break from my normal song scheme, partially because I couldn't think of any lyrics, and partially because I wanted to really drive home why some of this is so hard for Yan. If you don't remember what happened to her mother, go ahead and reread ch4. Anyway, I'd say 'enjoy' the chapter but it's not super enjoyable. It also hasn't been beta read, so just shout out in the comments if you see any errors, I'll fix them asap. I know I said this like... what was it, 4 chapters ago in my authors notes, but I'm coming up on writing the end of act 1, for really real this time lmao. Act 1 is about 41 chapters long, and somewhere around 225k words. There's lots of exciting things in store for Act 2, so I hope you are all holding onto your hats for that lol. Hope you all have a good weekend, I'll see you on mondayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. edit 5/13/19- added title. references the skye boat song, which the sky boat is very obviously named after. carry the lad who's born to be king over the sea to skye etc etc etcFri, 19 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-029/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-029/It's Kino's Cave Adventure! How did Kino like her time in the caves? Did she get to visit the hot springs after all? It's a mystery because Kino isn't a POV character! ;D [actually, I know exactly what Kino was doing while lost in the cave. you're welcome to speculate on it, though] On Friday we'll be back with Yan and Sid as they cope with the fact that they just killed a TON of people. This journey has been real full of emotional revalations for just about everyone, hasn't it? Yan and Sid discover they're capable of murder, and Aymon discovers he's capable of caring about his apprentices. [Kino discovers she's capable of getting lost in caves. Halen discovers Kino is real good at climbing out of holes.] This chapter has been lightly edited by myself, but I'm really bad at editing my own work, so if you see anything funky happening here, please feel free to shout it out in the comments. Hope you all have a good week; I'll see you on friday!Mon, 15 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-028/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-028/Time for us to check up on what's going on with Sandreas, Kino, and Halen as they have some fun times at the front. If you're missing Yan and Sid, we'll be back to them with next Friday's update. It's important to remember that yeah, Sandreas might act nice most of the time, but he's also almost completely in charge of an empire that's committing a massive genocidal program. So. Like. Don't forget about that. : ) Anyway hope everybody's week has been good. It was my birthday yesterday! This chapter is un-beta'd currently, so if you see some typos or glaring errors, please feel free to shout those out in the comments section. update 9/3/19 - added chapter title. chauvet cave, for those who don't know, is one of the foremost examples of paleolithic cave painting. to scrub its walls would be a terrible loss for humanity, but genocide is a whole lot worse.Fri, 12 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-027/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-027/Monday chapter day. If you're someone who gets today off, I hope you have enjoyed your long weekend! Anyway, Yan's having a real classic bad time out here. It's pretty rough to go from being someone who had never been in a fight to someone who has straight up killed like thirty or more people. This chapter has not had a beta read, so if you see any egregious errors, just shout them out in the comments and I'll fix them!Mon, 08 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-026/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-026/Thanks to DrMaster8 on Snow's writing discord for giving me a beta read on this chapter. This is sorta the 'boom goes the dynamite' chapter for this arc. Here's an update of what my progress is in writing the story. I'm currently writing chapter 38, which is quite near the end of the first 1/3 of the story, in terms of plot events. The current manuscript is also about 200k words long (this chapter [26] is at the ~120k words mark of the manuscript, for the curious among you). From the past few chapters through to 38 is all one arc, then there's a mini arc that will take us up to the end of the first 'act' of the story. Hope you're all looking forward to that : ) See you on monday!Fri, 05 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-025/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-025/Lol I kinda forgot I put this chapter before the next Yan chapter. We'll be bouncing back and forth between them for a while, but Yan gets more chapters because, well, she's the main character. We just couldn't leave Aymon/Halen/Kino alone for like an entire month. They get to have drama, too. Anyway this chapter is fairly short and fairly chill, but hey, Aymon's tragic backstory unlocked I guess. I know it's like cliche or whatever, but I enjoy writing stories about how traumatized people find eachother and then either help or hurt the people close to them. Aymon is meant to have similarities with all three of the apprentices. I can't say TOO much about this because that's Spoilers but it's very intentional when characters say they have things in common- both for the in text reason of 'I literally used my fancy mind powers to find people whose souls would match best with mine' and the reason of 'these characters are meant to be foils to eachother for thematic reasons'. So keep an eye out for that if you care about that lol. Don't sleep on Kino. I know she doesn't get a lot of screen time and she fades into the background a little bit, but- again- there are reasons for that lol. Ok I have rambled very much here. Enjoy your week, see you on Friday when we get back to what trouble Yan finds herself in.Mon, 01 Oct 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-024/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-024/Spoiler alert, but this is the last time you'll see Yan happy for a while, so enjoy these fun times while they last lol. Just as an FYI, I've been uploading this story to sufficientvelocity , so if you feel like leaving me a comment there, go for it. Of course, you can also comment here lol, I just didn't want anyone worrying that this story was getting crossposted without my permission. This chapter has not been beta read, unfortunately, so I hope that there aren't any major errors. If there are, feel free to point them out and I'll fix em. Hope everybody had a great week, and I'll see you on Mondayyyyyyy~Fri, 28 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-023/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-023/It's monday again in america... Anyway this is a transition chapter between the previous arc and the next, but we do get to catch back up with Sylva, who hasn't been abandoned or forgotten about lmao. Trust me when I say that Sylva stays relevant to the story so it's good to check up on her once in a while. This upcoming arc is pretty long, I'm currently writing ch34 and I'm still in the middle of it. Place your bets now on what disasters will befall the poor Yan, Sid, and Kino as they venture out into the universe. Maybye I should try to speed up my chapter production so I stay more ahead of my posting here. I don't know if a 10 chapter buffer is good or not lol. Anyway thanks to my beta Lydia who checked over most of this chapter :pMon, 24 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-022/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-022/And thus ends the second mini-arc of ItSoH! How very exciting :^) Next chapter begins with a timeskip of about a month, and all the apprentices get to go out on missions, during which much drama ensues, so get ready for that. Go ahead and take your guesses about who's going where, doing what, and what's going to happen along the way. Also, you finally got to meet Iri in this chapter, who I love. She's very fun n flirty, and will be important in the story. I don't know if anyone picked up on it, but the way I do the little quotes in the beginning is that chapters that have only Yan PoV get spacer songs, Yan and Aymon sharing get (folk) songs from planets (usually Lonn, since that's where Aymon is from), and Aymon by himself gets religious texts. Unless I've accidentally messed up my scheme along the way, in which case, that hasn't been happening >.> . As for this one today, I figure it's a classic children's thing to have songs about eating nasty garbage. worms specifically as in the classic [nobody likes me / everybody hates me / guess I'll go eat worms / long thin slimy ones / short fat juicy ones / itsy bitsy fuzzy wuzzy worms] or maybe the one that goes [ they're serving great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts / mutilated monkey meat / little birdies dirty feet / all wrapped up in a super duper booper treat / and I forgot my spoon / but I have a straaaaaaaw ]. Anyway, I just thought that was a nice contrast to the ultra fancy dinner setting Yan finds herself in. I'd love to hear what everybody thinks of the story and characters so far, please leave me a comment telling me any thoughts you've got! To me it still feels like thursday, but technically i'm publishing this veeery early on friday. See you on mondayyyyyy. update 8/28/19 - added chapter title. it's mitski lyricsFri, 21 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-021/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-021/Habby monday everybody. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Lydia's comment while reading this chapter was that the outfits sound cool, and yeah, ideal. Also it's not sexist that Sid doesn't get a gold lil crown thing, it would just be weird because he's bald (well, he keeps his head shaved anyway) haha. I like to imagine that he was given one and he spent about ten minutes debating with himself what he should do about it. See you on friday for a continuation of the governor's dinner.Mon, 17 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-020/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-020/Hope everybody's week has been good : ) Snow, from the RR discord, gave me some writing advice about making sure all my chapters have an actual purpose, and to make my dialogue less.... this. Unfortunately, this chapter, having been written months ago, is still full of the type of slice of life nonsense that I love. It's a chronic fault of mine that I love to meander while writing. But to be fair to me, I also love to read other people's intensely meandering writing, soooooo ¯\\_(ツ)\_/¯ Thanks again to my beta, Lydia, who is endlessly patient with my nonsense. If you try to sing the birthday song to the tune of our own 'happy birthday', you'll be sorely disappointed. Try singing it to the tune of the verses in 'lord of the dance'. Here's a fairly upbeat version of this song if you're not familiar with it. As with many folk-ish songs, the tune was cribbed from an older shaker song called 'simple gifts', which generally lends itself to even less energetic covers. Anyway like I've said, I have no qualms about shamelessly ripping off the tunes of folk songs to give myself some structure while I'm writing these little exerpts. Usually I don't tell you what song I'm stealing from, but here I didn't want anybody to thing 'what the fuck this doesn't go along to happy birthday' so Now You Know. I'm rambling again. See you on monday for The Big Event. And have a random poll that will probably stay open indefinitely because everybody loves to vote in polls : )Fri, 14 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-019/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-019/As I kinda promised, here's an extremely infodump-y interlude. You all are lucky that I chose (really my beta Lydia suggested) to do it this way instead of the 29 (twenty nine!!!!!) word doc pages I had actually written of this. Anyway, it seemed only fair that since Yan is getting an actual infodump that you will see some of it. Drip feeding information is valid but sometimes the main character just needs to sit down and read a textbook for a while lmao. Though all this does definitely get detailed later, it's useful to understand at least what information Yan has access to. Anyway, since this is in character as Yan, all spelling and grammar weirdness is intentional because she's just taking personal notes. Though this has also NOT been beta read for coherency, but I think it gets across most of the salient information. If you do think this needs clarification, please feel free to let me know and I'll do my best to answer any questions that you have. Keep in mind that Yan raises a lot more questions here than there are answers, and there are plenty more questions that she doesn't ask that she probably should. [also, fun fact, the Edden Star (ship) is named after one of my friends whose middle name is Edenstar] Anyway see you on Friday for a real chapter!Tue, 11 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-018/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-018/Kino's fine. At least as fine as Kino ever is lol. The next chapter that I have written is extremely info dump-y, which I think is bad. So I might rewrite it in a different style and post it sometime in the middle of this week as like an interlude if I'm feeling particularly motivated. When I first wrote it I knew there were like... 3 pieces of information that I wanted to convey, but those spiraled out into a billion branches and it just literally became 10k (well, really 7890) words of a textbook. so I'm uh. not posting that as is haha. we'll figure something out. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. See you on Friday :^)Mon, 10 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-017/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-017/It's the holodeck adventures episode! Every SF story has to have one eventually lmao. Here's to danger and excitement, yeah? Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. Hope everybody's had a good week, I'll see you on mondayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.Fri, 07 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-016/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-016/happy labor day if you're in the US. happy monday to everybody else. anyway, Yan probably should have figured out that she was under constant watch ages ago, but she's just like, 60% oblivious. you may have noticed (or not noticed) that I'm just copping the tunes and structures of real (folk) songs for use in my little intros. this one is more blatantly obvious than most of the others. but you know, stealing a tune and making up your own lyrics is the bread and butter of folk singing, so can you really complain :p thanks to Lydia for the beta read! Have a great week, see you on Friday for some major drama, etc edit 5/5/19 - added chapter title. references gordon lightfoot's song high and dryMon, 03 Sep 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-015/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-015/Happy Friday everybody! Hope your week has been going well. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read. In case you're wondering what my backlog looks like, this is chapter 16, and I'm currently writing 29, so I seeee the future. Hopefully my writing pace keeps ahead of my publishing pace so that we don't ever run out of backlog haha. Anyway, on Monday you can look forward to Yan learning an uncomfortable fact, and in next Friday's chapter there's Major Drama. update 8/21/19 - added chapter title. it's a lyric from a song I enjoy called 'get lost kid' by the artist jitney, from the album 86-300Fri, 31 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-014/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-014/Bit of a shorter chapter today, but this is a pretty decent stopping point. Hope everybody's monday is going well. I've spent the last two days turning crabapples into jelly and apple butter, so that's what I've been up to. As always, thanks to Lydia for the beta read!Mon, 27 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-013/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-013/Happy Friday everybody! Returning readers may notice the banners that have been added to the chapters. My beta reader, Lydia, suggested that I add something to differentiate between the different points of view. So this banner signifies when the 'camera' is following Yan, and this banner represents when we're with Aymon. Let me know what you think about it. [I'm aware that they look a bit awkward on the dark theme, but does anyone actually use it?] Although you may not have known it before, I am a fairly competent artist. Would it add any value to your reading experience if I included the occasional illustration? If so, please tell me if there's anything in particular you'd like to see. It's also come to my attention that the names of ships should /probably/ be italicized, which I have not been doing. If I'm feeling particularly motivated at some point I might go back and fix that haha. Part of the reason they're not is that my first drafts are written using this app, which is great for productivity but doesn't have rich text features. That's my excuse anyway. Now I'm just rambling. Hope you're enjoying the story thus far, and see you on mondayFri, 24 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-012/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-012/Slightly shorter chapter than the past two today, and we get to have a little more insight onto what Kino's deal is. Next chapter is the actual meeting with Ungarti Vaneik, the leader of the trade guild. The thing about the trade guild is that they occupy a veeeery precarious position in the empire. They have a LOT of power and freedom, way more than anyone else, but on the flip side, they need to toe the line of what the empire wants them to do. If they decide to disrupt the planned economy, or start being too sneaky with drug dealing, or moving people between planets without authorization, or really stepping out of line in any way, it's up to the empire to come down on them hard. But beause they have so much power, they actually have the ability to cripple the entire empire, and not just in terms of their economy. Still, it's in everyone's best interests to try to get along lol. Please let me know if you catch any typos or have any comments/criticisms on the writing. Since this chapter is un-beta'd I just have to edit mistakes afterward haha. Hope you have all been having a good monday. See you on friday with the next chapter!Mon, 20 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-011/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-011/Happy Friday : ) Hope you all have been having a good week. Most of my chapters after like chapter 9? have not been beta read, so if you do see any egregious mistakes or have some commentary on the writing feel free to let me know and I'll make the necessary edits Anyway, Halen's kinda a mess of a human, but who isn't, really?Fri, 17 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-010/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-010/Long chapter today, and the beginning of the current 'arc', which will take a good 15 or so chapters. Plenty of exciting stuff coming down the pipeline. I define 'arc' fairly loosely, but we'll be following the beginning of Yan's apprenticeship with Sandreas here for a while. Though the spelling errors in Yan's text convo with Sylva are intentional, any others are sadly not. Feel free to let me know or any you see and I'll fix it up. And as always an open invitation for people to chime in on how I write Sid's sign language. I know that sign language isn't a 1 to 1 with spoken/written english and has its own grammar and structure, but for ease of reading, I've mainly written it out in standard english. Anyway, see you all on Fridayyyyyy 8/16/19 - added chapter title. reference to this art piece [ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4t-NtrLzgkE ], which I when I first saw this still from it [ https://66.media.tumblr.com/d3ebe18730153d4da99e0348907c9512/tumblr\_n65w6cxF3x1qguputo2\_1280.png ], I was like 'wow. what a yan image'Mon, 13 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-004/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-004/Thanks again to Lydia (@eternalsdeck on tumblr) for the beta read.Fri, 10 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-007/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-007/Bit of a shorter chapter, but since last one was long it evens out in the end. Thanks to Lydia for the beta read once again.Fri, 10 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-008/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-008/Thanks again to Lydia for the beta read. We're getting to the end of this story arc, and also to the end of my beginning chapters. One more will be posted today, then I'll be moving to a monday and friday release schedule. I have a fairly sizeable (16 chapter) buffer, but you know how these things tend to get away from you, so that's why I'm only putting up ch 1-10 at the beginning. Anyway, hope everyone is enjoying the story thus far : ) 8/14/19- added chapter title. reference to a claddagh ring, which was something my mother always wore. I have very vivid memories of its shape.Fri, 10 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-005/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-005/Thanks again to Lydia for the beta read.Fri, 10 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-006/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-006/A little note on the rotating rings of the Iron Dreams. The ship has a radius of ~1km, and if I've done my math right, the rings should give a centripital acceleration of ~9m/s^2 . You want to keep the RPM pretty low so that people don't get motion sick, though if you lived there your whole life you'd probably get used to it. Also: I'm aware that it's fairly impractical to have the rings on the outside of the ship, because why not take advantage of the shielding that the bulk of the asteroid that they're on provides. Well, it's all about the #Aesthetic haha. Another thanks to Lydia for the beta read!Fri, 10 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-009/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-009/Short chapter, and the last chapter of the first arc : ) Next time: Yan reunites with Sid and eats some pizza See you on Monday!Fri, 10 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-003/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-003/Hi! I don't know if I have any Deaf or HoH readers out there, but Sid is a fairly major deaf character who does use sign language most of the time. Not ASL because we're not on Earth at all, and I don't have the patience for true conlanging, but if anyone wants to chime in on sign language use feel free to leave me a comment on it. Yan knows pidgin sign, because it's a useful language on ships, but she knows more technical vocabulary than conversational. Sid doesn't show up again for like, uh, ten or so chapters, but He'll Be Back. Hope you are all enjoying the story so far! Thanks again to my beta reader Lydia (@eternalsdeck on tumblr)Thu, 09 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMThttps://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-002/https://nparis.co/works/itsoh/in-the-shadow-of-heaven-original-version/ch-002/Thanks again to the wonderful Lydia (@eternalsdeck on tumblr) for the beta read.Thu, 09 Aug 2018 00:00:00 GMT